


Only Half the Time

by phoenixyfriend



Series: The Tales of Shinobi and Superheroes [2]
Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Naruto, X-Men (Movies)
Genre: Characters/Relationships/Tags will be added as they become applicable, Childhood Trauma, Family, Fluff, Gen, Humor, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-12-03
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-02-28 00:35:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 53,912
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2712503
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/phoenixyfriend/pseuds/phoenixyfriend
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tony has a kid. Well... sort of. They're family, anyway. The problem is, he only sees the kid half the time.</p><p>So, obviously, he needs to make the most of what time he has.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prologue

**Author's Note:**

> This story will contain discussions of sensitive matters, such as familicide, loss of one's children, and torture. None will be shown in-story, but these matters will be referred to, and the consequences will be dealt with on-screen.

_Prologue_

o.o.o.o.o

They all noticed it, over the course of the scant few days they had been together. Stark was _twitchy_ , and while he denied that anything was wrong, the lies were… actually pretty transparent, compared to everything else.

Coulson just remembered how apologetic Pepper Potts had looked when he’d stopped by to pick up Stark.

 _“There have been a few…_ issues _recently. Don’t get too worried if he spends a lot of time asking JARVIS for updates on unrelated things. He’s just worried about something.”_

Bruce had personally noticed those requests, even if he hadn’t been warned beforehand about them. Given how JARVIS updated Tony hourly, it was hard to miss.

_“Still no sign, Sir. And yes, he’s three weeks overdue now.”_

Steve had mostly noticed the issues that Tony’s anxiety had caused in the teamwork.

“ _Listen, Stark, I don’t know what’s going on in your personal life, but we’ve got an entire planet to save, so you better focus, or I_ will _get Fury to kick you out._ ”

Fury had just paid attention for a few scant seconds whenever Tony blew up a bit, but didn’t bother addressing it.

_“If it’s not impacting his work, then he can have his computers running all the damn side projects he wants.”_

Natasha was the one that had noticed the baggy eyes, but didn’t comment. She’d seen Tony work himself through many a sleepless night back when she’d been Natalie Rushman. She was also one of the few that knew what the problem _actually_ _was_.

_“This wasn’t what I expected when you told me you wanted me to meet someone, Mr. Stark.”_

Barely an hour after Germany, once Thor had joined the group, things finally came to a head. It was a lucky thing that Bruce was running scans in the lab, or the Hulk may have just made an appearance at a very, very inopportune moment.

o.o.o.o.o

Tony swore loudly, clapping a hand to the back of his neck and stumbling against the desk.

“Stark?” Despite the arguments they’d had so far, Steve wasn’t one to miss the signs of something serious. “What are you—?”

Tony ignored him, doing his level best to tear off his shirt and catch a look at what appeared to be a glowing tattoo on his back, circular and roughly three inches across, with Japanese writing all over it. Everyone seemed confused and worried… except for one Natasha Romanoff.

“Is it him?” The question was a simple one, and though there was no information regarding who the ‘him’ in question was, Tony seemed to understand.

“ _Obviously_.” Tony ground out. “Do you have a knife?”

The question, of course, brought still more yelling.

“Stark, are you _insane—_ ”

“—that whatever you’re thinking of doing is _not—”_

“—anoff, what the hell is going on with—”

“—know that Midgardians are prone to such—”

Once again, there was only one calm response.

“Of course I do.” Natasha wasted no time in digging out a knife from some hidden place and tossing it to Tony. It was small, a pocketknife with an unusually sharp blade and nothing more. “I’m guessing he’s in trouble.”

“No shit.” Tony groused, and a second later he was using the knife to slit his thumb (and his subconscious told him that the back of his hand would be safer, less painful, but the thumb was one of those stupid traditions that he'd picked up, and besides, it was a little more accurate for what he needed to do). “Nine weeks with no communication, and then _this_.”

With an awkward movement, Tony pressed his bloody thumb up against the tattoo on his back, smearing it across. Natasha was still watching calmly, and Thor seemed to have realized something if the look on his face was any indication, but it didn’t really matter, because just a second later there was an unusually large puff of smoke that made Tony vanish from sight.

The smoke cleared quickly, but the clicks of approximately three dozen guns being drawn and primed were nonetheless clearly heard. Within the dispersing cloud of smoke were four new figures, and the guns stayed up even when the battle wounds were revealed.

“You _idiot_.” Tony stepped forward, and no one at SHIELD had ever seen him like this, all worry and anger, not even Natasha. “What the hell did you get yourself into?”

The tallest of them shifted uneasily (and a few people noted that the person was taller than even Thor, though thankfully not quite of the Hulk’s stature), and moved into a hesitant but resigned stance, most likely in preparation for some kind of brawling. One of the other figures could be seen leaning heavily on… on a _sword_ of all things, larger than any that most of the room’s occupants had ever seen. The final pair of the interlopers sat on the floor, and as the smoke dispersed fully, they were revealed completely: an unconscious girl in the lap of a boy with a look bordering on desperation on his face.

The boy on the ground had eyes only for Tony, who refused to falter, though his attention was now diverted to the girl that was quickly bleeding out over SHIELD’s floors, and covered in strange burns.

Tony’s voice shifted, and he began speaking a language only a handful of people in the room understood. “ _What do you need?”_

The boy’s eyes were bleeding red, but the color faded quickly. He suddenly looked exhausted, but his voice still rang with desperation.

“ _Help her.”_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story begins in medias res, and future scenes will jump between the main story and the backstory. As a rule, each scene will begin with a timestamp and a location for ease of understanding.
> 
> This story contains a minimum of original characters (a nurse providing exposition, a waiter asking for orders, etcetera).
> 
> This story will contain a number of characters from non-MCU Marvel franchises (such as various mutants, the Young Avengers, and the Inhumans). However, the majority of these characters will not be introduced for a number of years in-story, and those that are introduced early on will be introduced piecemeal so as to make things easier for MCU fans that are not general Marvel fans. Characters that are present in Marvel but not in the MCU are liable to have their personalities, histories, and possibly even looks tweaked, as per the pattern set up by other universes Marvel as set up (e.g. compare mainstream (616) Kate Bishop to Ultimate (1610) Kate Bishop).


	2. The Letter

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony needs to explain what happened. Now.

**May 12, 2012**   
**3:32 PM**   
**Helicarrier**

By the time everything was taken care of, the Avengers were all settled around a table, with Fury, Hill, and Coulson at the head, staring them down with varying levels of anger and exasperation.

"What the hell is that kid doing here, Stark?" Director Fury finally asked, after several minutes of rather _interesting_ looks had been passed around the table.

"And who is he?" Steve Rogers asked, if rather tentatively. Had Tony been hiding information from everybody, he would have pressed much harder. Given that Fury seemed to already know and not care about the fact that the information wasn't public knowledge, however... "Am I the only one that doesn't know?"

"No, I'm going to have to say that there are a few others that haven't met him either." Phil Coulson was looking around the table with muted interest, the usual bland smile on his face.

"Well, Fury, Natasha, and Bruce know him." Tony leaned back in his seat and ticked of his fingers. "So does Clint, but he's MIA for the moment, so he doesn't count."

"So Loki knows about the kid?" Fury demanded. "If he gets his hands on one of-"

"He won't. Three of them have defenses against his kind of mind control, and the last is too injured to bother with." Tony laughed, then, much calmer than he'd been at any point in the past several weeks. "And, well, back to what I said earlier... he's technically met everyone here except... I'm sorry, what was your name? Jill?"

"Agent Hill." The woman told him, unimpressed, but soldiering on. "If they've met, then why don't any of the people you mentioned-"

"Recognize him?" Tony interrupted, spinning a pen between his fingers. "Good question. Simple answer. He was disguised when he met Thor, Cap, and Agent. Made himself look like his older cousin. Curly hair. Weird eyeliner. Less of a stick up his ass."

Natasha pursed her lips, hidden behind one hand, almost hiding a smile.

"And yet you still do not deign to inform us as to who the Midgardian child is." Thor wasn't _glaring_ , per se, but he seemed a little unhappy.

"Well... he's my kid. Sort of. We're related, anyway." Tony spun in his chair. "His mother is my first cousin, and I've been raising him since he was seven, after the rest of the family was wiped out. Bruce and Natasha met him at my place because reasons, and Fury knows about him because Natasha needed to report to someone about his existence and I didn't trust SHIELD enough to let any files exist on him, so the deal was just hammered out that Fury would know whatever Natasha told him, and I'd get to keep my little cousin's anonymity so that I wouldn't have people trying to kidnap him for ransoms and the like."

"That still doesn't explain how or why he just appeared in the middle of the Helicarrier looking half dead with a team that _was_ almost half dead." Agent Hill pointed out.

Tony made a face. "Well, maybe it's better if I start from the beginning."

o.o.o.o.o

**2003**

Tony Stark hadn't ever _really_ thought about kids, beyond a few small things that generally went along the lines of:

1\. They were icky, gooey, snotty things that weren't allowed in the workshop unless they happened to be as much of a childhood genius as he was (very, very unlikely) and knew not to distract him or touch anything (even less likely).

2\. He should probably have one at some point, because having an heir for the company was apparently a "thing" that he needed to do for some reason. That would necessitate getting married first, because stocks would drop if he had an illegitimate child or hired a surrogate (and he didn't really feel like dealing with the board members bitching about the stocks _again_ ), and since he wasn't really interested in getting married anytime soon anyway, he was even less prepared for a child.

3\. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he was terrified that he would be as bad of a father as Howard Stark had been, and didn't ever want to subject a kid to that. For all his faults, Tony _did_ actually care about kids, especially the ones that hypothetically happened to be his.

Altogether, this led to Tony being extremely averse to the idea of having kids. This type of thinking lasted until he was roughly thirty-two years old.

That was because, in the year 2003, Tony somehow managed to gain custody of a relative he had only vaguely been aware might have existed at all.

...At least the board couldn't complain about that.

Especially when no one told them.

o.o.o.o.o

**March 24, 2003**   
**2:03 AM**   
**Malibu**

Tony was in Malibu, typing away at a computer in an attempt to clear his head so that he could get some sleep before working on a new missile, when the tapping started. Unfortunately, it was loud and strange enough that he could in no way mistake it for the noise of the keys he was hitting, as it could only be the sound of something hard hitting the window.

He turned around to look out at the darkness that was outside the glass, and couldn't find the source of the noise for several seconds. Then he spotted it.

A bird.

More specifically, a hawk.

Even more specifically, a hawk with a scroll tied to its leg.

"Uh... well, uh, that's new." Tony stared at the bird for a few more seconds, and then at the scroll attached to its leg. The bird, if possible, looked rather annoyed. The scroll, to Tony, looked like a possible bomb.

"JARVIS?" Okay, so he hadn't perfected the AI yet, but the scanners he'd installed could, hopefully, help him out here.

"Yes, sir?"

"The scroll on that bird, do you know if there's anything on it that might... explode? Can you check? I think I gave you infrared, right?" Tony was pretty sure the bird was looking at him with something approaching derision now, which was slightly ridiculous, because this was ridiculous.

"There are no detectable explosives in the scroll, Sir." JARVIS answered, sounding just the slightest bit exasperated. Well... that was probably Tony's fault for programming a personality in.

"Okay, so... _probably_ safe to open. Still a chance it could blow up." Tony thought it over for several seconds, and then hopped over the back of the couch and opened the window, letting the hawk in. "Well, being careful never got me anywhere before; let's see what this baby's packing."

There were several seconds of silence, and then Tony gave his in-house AI yet another order. "JARVIS, buddy, can you scan this in and translate it? I don't speak Japanese. Or read it."

"Of course, sir."

Tony's face had been set in a neutral expression when he grabbed and opened the scroll, and even a bit amused when he asked JARVIS to translate the letter, but reading the letter itself lead him into an expression of rare incredulity.

_Mr. Anthony Stark,_

_According to existing records, you are the sole child of the Maria Stark. The woman in question was once Mariko Uchiha, a citizen of the Village Hidden in the Leaves, of the Land of Fire. She belonged to the Uchiha clan, which was rather large and powerful._

"Yeah, okay, I know all this already. Mom didn't talk about it much, but she did mention it a few times. Why bother contacting me now?" Tony rubbed the back of his neck, turning violently away from the words that were still being projected on the wall.

(He really needed to spend some more time working on getting those hologram prototypes to work. He was near a breakthrough; he just _knew_ it.)

"Sir?"

"I'm fine, JARVIS." Tony muttered. "Just... not memories I wanted brought up. I'll keep reading in a minute." It took several moments, but Tony managed to force himself to continue reading.

_Due to a recent tragedy, the entirety of the Uchiha clan barring two has been murdered._

Tony blinked for a second. He blinked again. " _What?!"_

"Sir?"

"I'm fine, JARVIS!" Tony brought a hand up to his head. He kind of hoped this was some horrible prank gone wrong, but he doubted it. His mother hadn't exactly been _open_ about where she'd come from, considering... well, considering that the entire continent was supposed to be one big secret.

"Okay, okay, fine. So, everyone's dead except two. They're telling me because... next of kin, maybe? I might be more closely related by blood than the remaining two, but I don't really think they'd contact me just for that." Tony pressed his face into his hands, walking around aimlessly for a minute. He didn't want to look. He knew the answers were in the letter, probably, but... urgh. He turned around, steeling himself to continue reading.

_One of the two surviving clan members has fled the country and become an internationally wanted fugitive, as all evidence points to him being the sole perpetrator of the tragedy._

"...Oh, you have got to be kidding me." So, Tony probably only survived whatever this was because he was on the other side of the world and only, what, a quarter Uchiha? His mom had been half, and that half was what had lead to her being considered 'too weak' for the clan because of some stupid eye thing that had made her need glasses anyway, which was why she left _in the first place_...

Never mind. Back to the letter.

_The other, Sasuke Uchiha, is the son of your first cousin, Mikoto Uchiha. As he is currently only seven years old, and you are his sole living relative without criminal charges leveled against them by the Village Hidden in the Leaves, you have the right to claim the role of his official guardian, should you choose to accept such. Your answer would be appreciated as soon as possible._

_Sincerely,_

_Hiruzen Sarutobi, Third Fire Shadow_

Tony stared at the paper in his hands for a few seconds, and then spoke to JARVIS in a deceptively calm, but tellingly strained, voice. "JARVIS, pull up any old letters and pictures that my mom had of her family."

Within minutes, Tony had the 'tree' set up, or as set up as he needed it to be. Tony's mother had been Mariko 'Maria' Stark nee Uchiha. Her mother had been Ariko Uchiha. Ariko's mother and father had been Keiko Uchiha and Hansuke Kaneko. Ariko's brother, also a child of Keiko and Hansuke, had been Shuichi. Shuichi's daughter had been Mikoto. Mikoto had no recorded children in any of the letters, but that was likely due to the fact that Maria had died before any information on that front could be exchanged.

So, for the most part, the _information_ in the letter checked out.

Tony looked at the bird. He wondered how long it would stay around, because this was something he _definitely_ needed to discuss with Obadiah first. Maybe Rhodey, too. Even Pepper's input would be helpful. And the board would need to...

No.

No, the board could _not_ be informed.

Scratch that, _no one_ would be told about any of this other than Obie, Rhodey, and maybe Pepper. Pepper had been working for him directly for about five years now, but did he really trust her that much?

...Yes. Yes, he trusted her enough. Barely, but even that was an incredible amount, for him.

Okay, so, those three would be asked, and it would all be done in person, in the house.

o.o.o.o.o

**March 25, 2003**   
**5:14 PM**   
**Malibu**

"You can't adopt a kid, Tony. You can barely take care of yourself." Obadiah put a hand on Tony's shoulder, trying to get his point across.

"It's not an adoption, Obie. He's my cousin's kid, apparently, so that kind of makes him my responsibility now." Tony stared at the floor, fingers laced together under his chin.

"That doesn't change the fact that you have a company to run, Tony, and you don't have the time for a kid. That kid would be left alone all the time, and... come on, Tony, you remember what happened with your dad, right? It's just not a good environment for a kid." The older man drew back, but the words had already hit home.

"I am _not_ going to be like my father." Tony turned his glare on the man that had played the role of father-figure to him for the past decade and a half. "I've got plenty of bullshit I'm already wasting time on, I can cut back on that instead."

"I think it's a good idea." Pepper offered, though she bit her lip and leaned back in her seat a bit when the men in the room turned their gazes on her. "Look, it's obvious that Tony wants this, and I'm willing to help arrange for tutors or school or whatever needs to be done on that front, and I know I can work the extra time into his schedule. If Tony thinks he's responsible enough for this, then I'm willing to support him through it and force him into doing what he's supposed to do if he slips up. I'll even work on processing profiles for bodyguards and the like with as little room for rumors as possible, since Tony wants to keep it all quiet."

"Thanks, Pepper." Tony smiled at her. Well, that was a good choice in PA. The choice had been reaffirmed near daily since she'd started anyway, but this was a good reminder. "Rhodey, what about you? You've been quiet so far."

The man in question looked up, and Tony felt his heart drop a bit at the conflicted expression that was now visible. "I'd be on your side normally, Tony, but... if the kid's entire extended family was murdered, he probably saw at least a part of it. The rest, I'm sure you could deal with, but if the kid's got PTSD, then you might be out of your depth. You don't know how to deal with that sort of thing."

The man brought up a good point, Tony thought as his eyes went back to looking at the ground. Though, the kid would be seeing psychologists anyway, right? Might as well make sure they were the best psychologists money could buy.

"...Does anyone? I can make sure the kid gets better care for it than whatever orphanage or foster care they put him in if I don't, right? Hell, I'm one of the richest men in the _world_ , Rhodey. All that money ought to be put towards _something_ useful other than fast cars and new tech." Tony tried to explain, and by the look on Rhodey's face, he got through.

"If you really think so, Tony." Rhodey's words seemed dubious, but the tone made it clear that he was a bit more open to the idea now that Tony was trying to come up with solutions to the various problems they were presenting with actual ideas, and not jokes.

So, Tony counted: Obadiah no, Pepper yes, Rhodey on the fence but leaning towards yes. Obadiah's opinion counted more than Pepper's, but Rhodey's was almost equal to Obadiah, and that meant that, since Tony had decided that he definitely wanted to 'adopt' the kid...

"Looks like there's going to be someone new in Stark Manor. JARVIS, I've got a letter for you to write. Get ready to start translating."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been using an online timeline (which I later found out was faulty, but whatever) as a reference sheet for the Avengers universe, as well as my own knowledge of the Naruto universe to cobble together something that functionally works its way into both worlds while keeping all the preset conditions I introduced in the first chapter. Unlike every other story I've written, I actually have a structured timeline written out in a word document on file, and it is eight pages long and growing all the time as I make contingency plans and new decisions.
> 
> Basically, everything will be explained in time, including the Shisui-faking that Tony mentioned and some stuff that seems OOC (but is actually the result of different events taking place).


	3. The Masked Man

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Masks usually mean something dangerous or something grand. Sometimes, though, they just mean chronically late dog ninjas.

**May 12, 2012**   
**3:42 PM**   
**Helicarrier**

"So you've had the kid for... nearly a decade now?" Agent Coulson tried to clarify. "That's a pretty long time to keep a kid a secret."

Tony chuckled, though even that sounded sarcastic. "Oh, Agent, Agent, Agent... You really think he spent all his time with me? You saw what he looked like back there. Do you really think I would have let that happen if I'd been able to stop it?"

Agent Coulson blinked. "You said he was from the Elemental Nations."

"Yep."

"Shinobi?"

"Unfortunately."

"And you couldn't do anything?"

"By the time I found out, well..."

o.o.o.o.o

**March 29, 2003**   
**8:53 PM**   
**Malibu**

The letter was sent, and no reply received. Tony started worrying that maybe he'd been judged an unfit guardian because of the tabloid stories and other well-known issues. He'd never had any reason to properly want a kid before, but recent events had forced him to reevaluate a few things, including his lifestyle. If he was going to be raising a kid, he was going to have to cut back on his less reputable habits. Drinking and sleeping around were things that he had _fun_ doing, and it helped him forget all the shittier parts of his life, but such well-known vices were sure to be scored against him when it came to his suitability as a guardian. Tony was actually rather scared that he wasn't getting a reply because the people from the Village Hidden in the Leaves had decided he wasn't good enough.

Pepper reminded him that the communication method of choice appeared to be carrier hawk, and that any communication method that relied on a _bird_ was more than a little liable to be slower than he was used to.

Tony calmed down a lot after that.

(He wouldn't _stop_ drinking and sleeping around, but if he had to cut something out of his schedule in order to make time for the kid that would soon be his, then it wasn't allowed to be the inventing, and probably wasn't allowed to be the board meetings.)

(The kid came first; Tony would _not_ be his father.)

(Hell, Tony was even trying to learn Japanese, though languages were _not_ his forte. He could become an expert on new scientific fields overnight, but languages took a little longer.)

He was in the middle of working on one of his cars when JARVIS alerted him to the fact that someone unauthorized had managed to get into the house, and was invisible to some of his sensors.

Tony figured that was probably a bad thing. "Kill the lights, except one over wherever this person is. Let them know that we know they're here, and just... ask them to stay put until I get there."

"Yes, sir."

Tony glanced to his left at all the weapons that were laid out on the tables, some finished, others not, and then sighed and grabbed one of the finished pistols, loading it. "I hate using these."

"You are the one that created them, sir."

"I know, J, I know. Doesn't mean I have to like using them." He really preferred less... mundane weaponry. Remote-controlled and tracking projectiles were much better. He knew how to shoot, of course, and was actually an incredibly good shot, but... guns were just so _crude_.

Tony hefted the gun in his palm, making a face, and kept it lowered to his side as he made his way up the stairs.

The sight that greeted him at the top of the stairs was one that was rather... confusing. A person with silver hair, some sort of uniform, and a white mask with red markings on it.

The man, slouching where he stood in a single beam of light, raised a hand and waved it at Tony. "Yo."

Tony was still tense, but he thought he maybe knew what was going on now. "JARVIS? Bring up the translation program again, on the wall. English to Japanese and back."

"At once, sir." JARVIS answered.

The man in the light didn't visibly react in surprise as most people did when faced with JARVIS for the first time, which, even with the mask, Tony found impressive.

"So, man in the mask, who are you? Why are you here? Mind taking the mask off? Etcetera, etcetera, just talk to me a bit." Tony gestured lackadaisically with the gun, having turned the safety on and not nearly as worried about it to go off. The man followed the gesture to look at the wall, which had the translation projected upon it.

"Ah..." The man sighed, straightening up, and Tony looked to the wall to understand what the man was saying, still not quite confident enough in his language skills to try playing it by ear. _"I am here on behalf of the Village Hidden in the Leaves to escort you to the village to speak with the Fire Shadow. You may call me_ ANBU _Dog."_

"JARVIS, don't translate that title. The Fire Shadow thing. And leave the first-name-last thing as-is." Tony waved a hand almost dismissively at the ceiling. "So, have you been ordered to take me back no matter what, or is this just an optional thing?"

" _Optional. However, it is very difficult to gain access to the Hidden Continent without a shinobi escort._ " The man tilted his head at Tony. " _The Hokage and council refuse to allow Uchiha Sasuke out of the village unless he is escorted by an_ ANBU _guard and you have met with the Hokage himself for some discussions regarding Sasuke's future due to contracts that were signed by his parents when he was a child._ "

Tony froze. Contracts. _Contracts_. He hated contracts. A lot.

That was the moment that he decided that, if he was going (which he damn well was), Pepper had to come with him.

"I see. So, why'd you jump in through the window at..." he glanced at his watch. "9:02 PM?"

" _I only just arrived._ " The man's head tilted slightly, almost mocking. " _And the window is my preferred method of entry_."

Tony snorted. "Alright, Mr. Cloak-and-Dagger. Let's assume I trust you. So how about you answer me a few things? You're probably some kind of Black Ops, and I'm guessing you aren't here because _I'm_ particularly important to your country; there's something special about the kid. The question is: what's the big secret?"

The man in the mask tilted his head. " _Do you know of the Sharingan?"_

"...it's about the goddamn eyes."

" _Essentially_."

"Son of a bitch." Tony pressed a hand up against the side of his head. There was a _reason_ his mom left. "How did you get into the country?"

" _Completely legally, funnily enough_." The man's voice was mechanically altered, probably by the mask itself, but it still carried an air of certain amusement. " _Will you be coming with me?_ "

Tony smirked. "Let me bring along my own protection detail, and show me what's under that mask, and I might just think about it. Oh, and do you have some official correspondence from your... boss?"

If going along with a shinobi was his only way to get the kid, then he _would_ be going along, but he had to read through the other possibilities that JARVIS had looked up and research this guy's credibility first.

The man tilted his head, dug out a small scroll, and tossed it over to Tony.

Tony fumbled the catch.

"Gee, thanks."

" _I'm afraid that, while I have permission to take of my ANBU mask in this specific case if requested to due to personal reasons involving the Uchiha clan, you will likely be rather disappointed by what lies beneath._ "

"Humor me."

" _Heh_." The man reached up, grabbed the mask, pulled it away and revealed... another mask.

With a strip of fabric and metal covering one eye.

There was, maybe, fifteen percent of the man's face visible.

And from the look in the visible eye, the man (now seeming much younger without the mask) was smiling the most shit-eating grin in the world.

Tony stared.

"...I _like_ you." Tony decided.

o.o.o.o.o

**April 3, 2003**   
**11:18 AM**   
**Just off the coast of California**

"Tony, you do _not_ need me here. Happy would have come along too, if you asked him."

"Hush, Rhodey. No complaining now. Besides, Happy can act as a bodyguard, but he can't fly the plane" Tony patted his friend's hand, which was on the controls for the jet, and then looked up at ANBU Dog. "You look confused."

The man looked at him for a second, and then glanced down at the small phone that Tony had loaned him for the sake of translations. " _We were not aware of your financial status. It is rather... surprising. Several of the council were worried that whoever you were, you would attempt to gain custody simply for the money that was left to Sasuke by default after the clan's death._ "

"It's probably not even two percent of my net worth." Tony raised a glass in ANBU Dog's direction with a smirk. "Trust me, not a big deal."

"Tony, we are on your personal jet. I'm pretty sure he's realized that by now." Rhodey rolled his eyes.

"Down boys." Pepper reprimanded them, not looking up from the computer on her lap. "Rhodey, don't feed his ego. Tony, stop flashing your ego."

"I could flash something else." Tony offered, almost nonchalant.

"No, Tony." Both Rhodey and Pepper answered, sounding more bored than anything, a little too used to his antics.

"Hey, Pepper, aren't you supposed to call me Mr. Stark?" Tony tilted his head, probably in a way that he thought was cute.

"Tony, the number of times I've caught you with your pants down, quite literally, is far more than I'm comfortable with. The number of times I've tided over press scandals for you are astronomical. The number of times I've cleaned up your messes is ridiculous. I have the right to call you by your first name if I feel like it." Pepper never even looked up from the screen.

"...Thanks, Pepper."

"... _You are all very strange._ " ANBU Dog commented.

o.o.o.o.o

**April 4, 2003**   
**3:02 PM**   
**Hokage Tower, Konohagakure**

"So... that was a disaster and a half." Tony said brightly.

"They had nowhere to land the plane, Tony. It would have been nice if you'd checked in about it _before_ we took off." Pepper was still a little jittery from the problem that had arisen.

"They took care of it!" Tony insisted. "They managed to expand their little dirt road enough to let us land within minutes of us radioing in the problem!"

"Not our best moment, Tony. Not our best moment." Rhodey was rubbing the heel of his palm against his eye. "We might have ended up having to crash land if they hadn't been able to do that."

"But we _didn't_." Tony insisted. "So let's let bygones be bygones, and try to figure out how there are thirteen-year-old kids jumping across rooftops that easily instead. Are you curious? I'm curious. That doesn't science."

"Science isn't a verb, Tony." Pepper reminded him.

"It is now." Tony decided, crossing his arms, tapping one finger against his arm. "Hey, Doggy boy, when do we get to meet the head honcho?"

The man that had accompanied them, now back in the mask that he'd first showed up in, tilted his head as Tony dug his phone out for the translations. " _The Hokage will call us in when he is able to. I would not suggest entering beforehand, as you are nowhere near as influencial and immune to consequences as you are back in the Outer Contries. Our military heirarchy is rather different from your own, and your money is both unknown and irrelevant to us._ "

"...I call bullshit."

" _I thought you might._ " Even with his face hidden behind the expressionless animal mask, the man gave off the air of grinning. " _Your wealth is, in some ways, very relevant to your situation. If you were to become a patron of Konoha in any way, it would be very helpful to us, and to your own case in regards to cementing custody of Uchiha Sasuke. However, your wealth will not protect nearly as well as it did back in your home country, and any opponents you make on the political field will not be so easily cowed."_

Tony thought it over for a second. "Is this because you guys decide that whoever can bash the most heads is the one in charge?"

" _We do put a little more thought into it than that, but you are, essentially, correct. Very few positions of power are held by those who do not have large quantities of chakra-based power, or are at least knowledgeable enough about how to use their power on a battlefield to win against those who normally dominate the field. A candidate for any position must demonstrate power, loyalty, and intelligence, or at least a willingness to take counsel and consider problems carefully, and while the latter two are more difficult to measure, the first quality is liable to put you in danger should you insult the wrong person._ "

Pepper put a hand on Tony's shoulder, pulling him back down into his seat. "If it's still getting you angry, then you can do something about it later. For now, just play along until you can actually see the board instead of making moves blindly."

"Oh, Pepper." Tony smiled at her. "I never knew you were into chess metaphors."

"If you make one about sex, I'm not covering for you at the next board meeting you miss." Pepper anticipated his comment before he even made it. Damn. "Rhodey? Any thoughts?"

"I agree with you, honestly. I haven't really gotten much of a chance to see how this area works on that front, but what we know tells us that we're not exactly in a position of power right now. Playing it safe might actually save your life this time, Tony."

"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Hey, doggy boy, tell me some more stuff about how your wall-walking thing works while we wait."

"... _Well, chakra can be used as a binding agent when applied properly..._ "

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A helicopter cannot make it that far on a single tank of gas, and Tony's too impatient to go on a boat, so they used an airplane. Kakashi decided to be a little shit and not warn them about the lack of landing spaces. He definitely warned the Hokage (which is why it only took a handful of minutes to get the road expanded), but Tony? Nah.


	4. The Contract

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the Merchant of Death makes a deal with the ninja professor. Because that's totally how these things are supposed to work.

**April 4, 2003**   
**3:15 PM**   
**Hokage Tower, Konohagakure**

"Come in."

Tony straightened up from where he was peeking at Pepper's laptop over her shoulder, and stared at the door. Okay, so the guy in charge could speak English. Good to know.

"Well, time to see what kind of mess Tony's going to drag us into now." Rhodey muttered, though he didn't seem too concerned; he was just standing there, holding Pepper's bag as she packed up the work supplies she'd had out. "Hopefully, we aren't going to get into trouble over the plane."

"Eh, I can pay them off." Tony waved a hand dismissively and sauntered off, striding through the door like he owned the building. He didn't, but he could totally buy the place if he felt like it (which he also didn't, but that was neither here nor there, because the point, in Tony's mind, was that he _could_ ).

The man at the desk was old, but not _super_ old, to Tony's judgment, and he was usually pretty good at judging a person's age (he had to be, especially when it came to potential paramours that were young enough for him to have to ask for an ID first). This guy was older than the ages that Tony had the most necessary experience with, but Tony would put him at... mid-sixties, or possibly late fifties with a dose of unnecessary stress.

"So, you're the big man in charge. Nice to meet you. I'm Tony Stark." Tony, as per usual, dismissed most senses of decorum and simply walked up to the desk and held out a hand to the old guy to shake, despite being some ninety-two percent sure that Pepper and Rhodey were busy commiserating over how terrible a person he was or something like that behind him.

"Indeed." The guy's voice was heavily accented, but still quite understandable. He shook Tony's hand as if irreverence was a daily fact of life for him. "I am the Sandaime Hokage, and I believe my name would, in your order, be Hiruzen Sarutobi."

"Thanks for the thing with the plane, by the way. Some warning would have been nice from doggy-boy over there,"

ANBU Dog made a strangled sort of noise. He was probably looking at the phone for translations again.

"But thanks anyway. Crashing wouldn't have been fun, and people would start asking questions about how I managed to get one of my planes destroyed so soon after the last one."

Sarutobi raised an eyebrow. "And what, pray tell, happened to the last one?"

"North Korea decided to try shooting us down while we were in the air. We made it down South far enough to make an emergency landing in South Korea, but the plane wasn't... well, it wasn't really in the best shape. Repairable, yeah, but still pretty heavily damaged." Tony shrugged.

"...You have many enemies." Sarutobi observed. Tony didn't bother trying to contradict him, just sat down in one of the chairs provided, Rhodey and Pepper doing the same on either side. The information wasn't a secret, and if the ninjas weren't capable of figuring it out from the days that the ANBU had spent with Tony, then they weren't worth being called ninjas.

"I'm not dead yet." Not for lack of trying, but nine kidnapping attempts as a child and five as an adult, and Tony still hadn't suffered more than a few hidden scars and three broken bones (two ribs when he was twenty, and the leg when he was sixteen).

"Good bodyguards?" Sarutobi seemed almost amused.

"The best that money can buy." Tony nodded, and then clapped his hands. "So, I should probably tell you who these two are. The lady's Pepper; she's my PA."

"Hello." Pepper bowed her head for a few seconds, the closest she could come to bowing fully as she knew she should be doing in a country with a culture so heavily based on the Japanese while sitting.

"And that's Rhodey; he's my best friend and also protection-slash-pilot fore this little trip."

"Pleasure to meet you." Rhodey's voice was stiff, but they were in a military village, a place that was putting Rhodey back into Air Force mode without much trouble.

"And they're two of the three or four people that I'm going to trust with knowledge about the kid without having them sign about thirty feet of paperwork." He glanced at Pepper, who rolled her eyes.

"I've had the NDAs written up since Wednesday, Tony." Pepper assured him.

Tony grinned at her and turned back to Sarutobi, who was watching them with a calculating eye. "So, what exactly is it that I need to know about all this? I'm guessing this isn't going to be as simple as this sort of thing usually is, and I can't really call _that_ simple in the first place."

Sarutobi steepled his fingers, continuing to stare at them strangely. When he finally spoke, he was strangely hesitant. "Both your situation and Sasuke's make this much more complicated than usual. From what you have said thus far, I believe you mean to keep him out of the public eye. Am I correct in this assessment?"

"For as long as possible, or until he's eighteen." Tony nodded. "That's not a problem, right?"

"That's actually a rather good thing, I would say." Sarutobi leaned back in his seat. "Sasuke's going to have a lot of people after his head, and if he's both outside of the country and a living secret, then that can only make him safer."

"They're after the eyes." Tony had already asked ANBU Dog, yes, but... well, he'd like to hear some confirmation as well.

"Yes." Sarutobi said it simply, as though it wasn't _completely ridiculous_. "Given that he is both quite young and from a long line of Sharingan-bearers, as well the nature of his brother, he is going to be a prime target for many opportunists on the continent."

"Excuse me." Pepper interrupted with a smile on her lips and her usual air of _I have this under control, but do try to make my job easier before I pull out every last plug in the shop, so help me God, Tony._ "But what exactly is it that makes these eyes so special?"

Sarutobi raised an eyebrow. "The Sharingan is a _doujutsu_ passed down through the Uchiha over the course of several centuries, at least. It manifest as red irises with black comma-like markings, which spin in conjunction with their usage. The eyes, at varying stages, can copy physical attacks, chakra-based attacks, predict the movements of the enemy, provide perfect recall, and aid in the casting of illusions."

Tony's lips had pressed thinner and thinner with every word. Part of it was just memories of his mother and her less-than-fond memories of those eyes taunting her at every turn, and part of it was just... "I always hated hearing about all that. It shouldn't be possible. At all. Biology just doesn't work like that. Your chakra can explain some of it, but the color change just... really pisses me off."

"So it's a genetically-based super power?" Rhodey asked, glancing at Tony, who only took a second to understand.

"I suppose so," Sarutobi answered, leaning back in his seat. "There are quite a number of them here on the continents. Even within Konoha, there are still several other than the Sharingan."

"So... like entire clans of mutants." Rhodey seemed to be considering something, though Tony preempted his question.

"Don't go running to any of your superiors. I think I know someone else that'll need to know first." Tony did, actually, if only by reputation; he'd only really met the man once or twice at some gala or other. Professor Charles Xavier was technically just the principal of some private school out in the middle of nowhere, sure, but the man was pretty well known for his research into mutation-based superpowers, and pretty much the top of the field, which was pretty surprising, considering just how _rare_ mutants were, and how well most of them hid. Sure, there'd been that one extremist group that had cropped up when Tony was a kid, but there hadn't been enough to really cause much trouble before they'd gone underground.(1)

"You sure?"

"Positive. Now, are the eyes going to be something I have to worry about?" Tony fiddled with a pen that he'd somehow managed to dig out of Pepper's briefcase. Huh. He hadn't noticed himself doing that. "Other than the whole 'there might be people trying to kidnap the kid,' which I'm already preparing for because of the shit that went down when I was a kid."

Sarutobi tilted his head, considering. "There may be. If his eyes were activated during the recent tragedy, they were likely trauma-locked as well, considering that he doesn't seem to be under the impression of ever having them. However, if they _were_ activated at all, he will perfectly recall every second of what he saw."

Pepper was the one to ask the question that Rhodey and Tony didn't quite dare. "And what did he see?"

"I believe that he walked into his parents' bedroom just as his brother pulled a blade out of their mother. Prior to that, he walked past a number of corpses to arrive at the building at all." Sarutobi seemed to grow older with every word.

There was silence for several seconds before Tony swore, standing up and beginning to pace the room. "Son of a _bitch_ ," he spat, turning on his heel again and again as he went across the room and back. "Pepper, please tell me some of those shrinks you were looking at have experience with kids with PTSD."

"I think there were a few." Pepper fingers twitched towards her bag, as though to pull her laptop out, but the motion was aborted partway through. "I'll check again later."

"Shrinks?" Sarutobi asked, eyes alight with... something. Interest, definitely. Maybe hope. He'd probably thought that Tony would do the bare minimum, all things considered. Well, too bad for him. Tony wasn't going to play at being his own father in this respect. He was going to do things as best as he could, and he had people to help him.

"Psychologists. We knew he'd need grief counselling, at least, but it looks like we'll need someone experienced in something a little more... difficult." Pepper winced. "Even without the perfect recall, we'd have insisted on sending him to someone on that front. No kid that sees that sort of thing is going to grow up right."

Sarutobi nodded along, but there was a different look in his eyes. "Mr. Stark, I believe I mentioned some contracts that had been signed by Uchiha Sasuke and his parents in the letter that ANBU Inu gave you?"

Tony resisted the urge to look back at Dog. "Yeah...?"

"Uchiha Sasuke is currently under contract to finish his schooling at the Academy and become a Konoha shinobi, and while I am aware that contracts are dissolved upon one's death in your country, and that a minor, particularly one so young, a contract can be easily voided. However... this is not your country." Sarutobi had probably already figured out what their knee-jerk reactions would be. Well, too bad. He'd be hearing it anyway.

"The ninja school."

"Yes."

"The one where he'd learn about how implement violence, kill people, steal, lie, etc."

"Yes."

"After his entire family was murdered."

"...Yes."

"If I didn't exist, would you be giving him any psychological help?"

"We would offer it, yes."

"But not force the issue."

"We would not."

Tony eyed him for several seconds, ignoring the warning looks that he was sure Pepper and Rhodey were sending him. "If that's indicative of your usual policy on literally _anything_ else involving your ninja's mental health, I'm surprised that this is the first massacre you've had."

"Tony!" Pepper hissed, no longer trying to act as though she expected him to play at diplomacy properly. There was a strangled squawk from the back of the room, but by this point, Tony was kind of sure that the guy was just doing it for fun, not actually taken aback.

"It's true!" Tony pointed at Sarutobi, looking him in the eye as he spoke. "You're teaching a heavily traumatized kid how to kill and hurt people for a living and you just admitted that you wouldn't even make the kid try to go through at least some grief counselling, if not full-on _years_ of therapy. You sure the brother didn't have some kind of dark history like that either? 'Cause at this point, I wouldn't be surprised."

Sarutobi waited patiently for Tony to finish, almost as though this was a regular thing for him. "If you're quite finished, I would like to point out that there are some extremely restrictive laws instituted by my predecessors that I cannot break without causing civil unrest. If it were up to me, Sasuke would not be allowed back into the Academy until he had been cleared by a Yamanaka. Unfortunately, my hands are tied."

"Thought this was a dictatorship."

"It is, usually. If we were in a state of war, my word would be absolute, and even without a war to deal with, I have the final say on all matters. However, my decisions do have consequences. There are repercussions, and I cannot risk the possibility of a civil war for the sanity of a single child, no matter how much I would like to. You, however..." Sarutobi inclined his head towards Tony, and suddenly, Tony understood. The kid would still have to end up coming back to the Academy, probably, because _ninjas_ , and they'd probably kidnap the kid back if he showed signs of keeping the kid longer than they were comfortable with, but...

"Oh, you magnificent _bastard._ " Tony was outright _leering_ at the idea.

Sarutobi blinked. "Excuse me?"

"Sorry, it's... it's a compliment. Like calling you a mastermind. Ish. Sort of. You know, like playing chess with people's brains."

"Tony." The two reprimands came simultaneously.

"Sorry, Pep. Sorry Rhodey." Tony shook his head. "So, I'm guessing that part of why you decided to contact the decidedly not-ninja me to take care of the kid was so that you don't end up with another crazy Uchiha. They can't argue with an actual adult relative taking control of the kid's life."

"To put it bluntly."

"I know respect you more than I did three and a half minutes ago." Tony leaned back in his seat, smirking. "Anything else I need to know?"

"You'll be introduced to Sasuke tomorrow, but for the time being, I would like to speak with you on other matters. While the Shinobi Nations as a whole refrain from using advanced weaponry due to several international treaties that signed during the Second Shinobi War, there is nothing banning us from other forms of foreign technology."

"Opposite of a nuclear deterrent." Tony mused. "Rather than build bigger, more powerful bombs to destroy everything, you cap it off as low as possible."

"Not quite, as we focus our energies into other forms of destruction instead. Sealing and chakra-based techniques. I believe that the tailed demons can be nearly as destructive as a nuclear bomb, as are certain S-rank techniques." Sarutobi chuckled drily. "It is less a matter of not wanting to escalate in power than a matter of realizing that we cannot be trusted with this power on top of everything else we possess. The odd civilian may have a gun, and small-scale foreign bombs aren't unheard of, but anything too advanced is avoided."

"So what do you want from me, then? You should know that weapons is the biggest part of my company, considering how much Lassie over there was reporting back when he was at my place." Tony jerked his head in ANBU Dog's direction, just in case the reference wasn't understood.

"It was implied, I believe, that you have other parts to your company as well. I want to extend the offer of a contract with Konoha for certain supplies." Sarutobi leaned forward, his fingers steepled atop the desk. "Infra-red goggles, better radios, cameras, medical technology. We may choose not to use advanced weaponry, but the rest is free to exploitation."

"And other than the contract, what do I get out of it?" Something to the Elemental Nations would need to be largely secretive.

"It will go a long way to buying the goodwill of the more powerful forces in the village, and can be used as an excuse for you to take Sasuke away from the village whenever you need to, though I ask, of course, that you let him spend at least half his time in the village." Sarutobi smiled. "So, would you lend us your aid in caring for our sick, in supporting our security systems, in reconnaissance and keeping our borders safe?"

"Are you technically allied with the United States?" Tony bit at his lip. There'd been some shady dealings before he took over the company, and he didn't want a repeat of some of the things he'd seen. If he was dealing with shady governments, then they'd need to be on his side already.

"Konoha is, I believe, the United State's main contact within the Elemental Nations, and the closest of her allies here." Sarutobi explained.

Tony tilted his head, and then glanced at Pepper. "How quietly can we do this?"

She pulled up a new document. "We can route it through Japan."

"So..."

"As quietly as we did STRIKE and SHIELD." (2)

"We'll write it up as soon as we get back to Malibu, then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1\. Due to copyright issues, a lot of the comics characters and organizations do not and most likely will not show up in the MCU (at least, not for quite some time). However, their presence is something that is either needed or difficult to work around (for instance, Wanda and Pietro exist, but Magneto may never be mentioned due to FOX owning the rights). I'm playing around with this for now, with there being a smaller mutant population than in the comics, the mutant organizations being smaller and dissolving early on, and essentially just making them background, underground organizations that function well in human society, to the point where portions of the population aren't even aware that mutants are a thing. Similarly, the Fantastic Four exist, but they are out-of-focus and still completely human; that may change, depending on how I feel about them later on. Aliens exist, but do not involve themselves as much as in the comics. Spoiler alert: the first alien character from outside the MCU (so not a Thor, Thor II, Avengers, or GotG character) that we'll be seeing in this fic, if everything goes according to plan, is actually Teddy Altman, otherwise known as Dorrek VIII.
> 
> 2\. STRIKE is, in the comics, the British equivalent to SHIELD. SHIELD itself, I'm assuming, had quiet but completely aboveboard dealings with Tony after Howard died. Tony wasn't too bothered with what was being done with the weapons, since he knew that he was selling them to government organizations responsible for peace. He started paying a little more attention after Afghanistan, of course, but things still came in as primarily normal on that front. (It would, even if Hydra was getting its tentacles dirty with Stark tech. They had that well-hidden, after all.)


	5. The Hospital

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sasuke is suspicious, Steve is confused, the Hyuuga are racist (sort of), and Tony's just done with all the ninjas.

**April 4, 2003**   
**4:50 PM**   
**Hospital, Konohagakure**

The kid had weird hours. It wasn't that much of a surprise, but the kid was still in the hospital (officially to make sure there wasn't any lasting physical damage from the usage of the stupid eyes, and unofficially to keep an eye on the kid for psychological reasons and until they figured out what to do with him), and was sleeping through most of the day due to not being allowed to do any of his activities of choice, other than read.

Tony knew it would be stupid to wake the kid, so he pulled out a laptop, sat down in one of the (private) room's chairs, and started playing around with the designs for a new kind of missile. He wasn't getting any real flashes of inspiration, but there were at least a few little tweaks he could add to what he had laying around before he got back to Malibu.

He was midway through some adjustments on the fins of what was _technically_ an ICBM when he heard some rustling coming from the bed. He glanced up, but looked back down within the second, and didn't try to get the kid's attention; that would probably make the kid panic. On the other hand, if Tony ignored him and just acted like he belonged there (which he did) until he tried to get Tony's attention, the kid would probably be a lot more open to the idea of talking to him.

Maybe.

"Oi."

Tony ignored that.

"Teme dare?"

Tony finally looked up at the kid, and then waved rather lazily. "Hey, kid."

The kid didn't seem to understand that. Fair enough; Tony hadn't spent his time at seven on foreign language either; Tony had studied circuitry instead (and the kid had studied ninja killing techniques, because the Hidden Continent was completely ridiculous).

The kid repeated the question, demanded, really, and seemed to be gearing up to fight him, because ninjas.

o.o.o.o.o

**May 12, 2012**   
**3:51 PM**   
**Helicarrier**

"Because… ninjas?" Steve Rogers, the lauded Captain America, seemed rather confused.

"Yes." Tony nodded as though the answer made all the sense in the world. "Because ninjas."

"Steve." Bruce reached over and lightly put his hand on the man's shoulder. "Ignoring Tony's disregard for the rules of grammar, you know what a ninja is in most of media, right?"

"Yes?" Steve hadn't learned _everything_ about the modern era, but he'd picked up on a lot since Tony waltzed into his life with a sarcastic quip and absolutely no respect. "They're spies in ancient Japan. Or a special kind of spy, these days."

"Pretty much." Bruce hesitated. "These days, the only places where 'ninja' is really a standard job option is in the Elemental Nations on the Hidden Continent, and there… it's really more of a system of organized mercenaries."

"Nah, mercenaries are basically the freelance operatives with no ninja training." Tony butted in. "Though he's right in that they basically do anything they're paid to do, so long as it goes through the village first, and they function as the village's military, and also occasionally as the entire country's."

"The… village?"

"A centralized, city-wide military dictatorship that functions as a quasi-separate entity within the country that it exists in." Natasha explained, wry grin on her face; she had her own experiences with the system, some of which coincided with Tony's. "Imagine if a city or town, maybe the size of Staten Island, was 40% civilian and 60% military, and had an existing pact with the United States to function as a special ops force in case of emergencies, along with taxes and civilian laws in line with the rest of the country, but generally functioned as a separate entity, sending out operatives out on missions covering everything from agricultural help to reconnaissance to guard missions to assassinations. Due to the power of the denizens, the country can't get rid of them, and due to the money in the country, the village can't rebel."

"That sounds rather precarious."

"The villages are usually more concerned with each other and with their own rogue elements. No time for taking down the government." Natasha hummed a bit. "Very little interaction with the rest of the world as well. The Hidden Continent keeps to itself, as far as the shinobi go. Even the civilians mostly limit themselves to just trading by sea, rather than by plane or anything more modern."

"Hidden village politics are messy and ridiculous." Tony declared, and then tilted his head, considering. "I have an employee that understands it pretty well, though, and he can explain it if you ask him. You've met Mr. White, right?"

Steve nodded silently, because he knew _exactly_ who Mr. White was. As embarrassing as Steve's mistake had been, he wasn't likely to forget it.

"Well, great. He can explain shinobi politics to you at some point when I'm not telling my story." Tony spun his chair around in a full circle. "Right, so, where were we?"

o.o.o.o.o

**April 4, 2003**   
**4:51 PM**   
**Hospital, Konohagakure**

"I can't understand you." Tony said, though he though he understood most of what was being said; languages weren't exactly his forte. He could become an expert on new scientific fields overnight, but languages took a little longer.

The kid seemed to understand what was going on, and deflated, settling back into his seat, arms folded, and glaring moodily at Tony. Tony raised an eyebrow and passed a spare phone over, the translation program already running. "Here, try this." He held his own phone up. "Look, I've got one too."

The kid picked up the phone gingerly, as though expecting it to blow up at any second. After a couple of seconds, he seemed to realize what was going on, and then repeated his question again.

" _Who are you?"_

"Tony Stark." Wait… "Well! You guys put family names first, right? So I guess I'm actually Stark Tony here. Wow, that's weird to say. You feel like introducing yourself now?"

" _My name is Uchiha Sasuke._ "

Something _clicked_ at that moment. Tony had known the name before, of course, but actually hearing him introduce himself… that was the moment when he went from "the kid" to "Sasuke."

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Not exactly a man of many words, are you?"

Sasuke didn't even bother to say anything this time, just grunted.

"You're going to be trouble; I can tell." Tony had had a few phases like this of his own.

" _Are you supposed to be my new therapist?"_ Sasuke asked, almost wary. If Tony said yes, the kid wasn't going to be talking.

" _Hell_ no." Tony shuddered. "I'm not exactly good at the comfort thing, and honestly, I don't think anyone would trust me with their mental health. No, I'm here for a different reason." He snapped his fingers. "Hey, JARVIS, bring up the family tree on Sasuke's phone, and make sure it's in Japanese, though you should probably keep the English for my branch, or at least have it as a subtitle-y thing."

"At once, sir."

Sasuke didn't jump when JARVIS's voice came out of the machine, but he did stiffen and glare suspiciously as the picture was brought up. After a couple of seconds, he looked back up at Tony, eyebrows furrowed. " _This is impossible._ "

"Impossible? Impossible things sometimes pop up in front of me. Usually I get rid of them pretty easily. Tell me, though; what's so impossible about that?" Tony challenged.

" _You should be dead!_ " Sasuke hissed. " _Everyone is dead!_ "

"So… you think I'm lying? Or you're not letting yourself hope? Or you're bitter that it was me that survived and not someone you already knew?" Tony was pretty sure it was all three, and the uncomfortable look on the kid's face told him all he needed to know.

(The kid had a better poker face than most his age, but Tony was used to dealing with politicians and businessmen. He could read that kind of face without trouble.)

"Kid, listen. I live halfway across the world, in the United States, and do you know what that means? It means that, if your brother wanted to, at any point, come to kill me, he'd have had to travel for at least a few days, especially since you guys apparently don't do planes. On top of that, I had some genetic tests done when I was younger, and I didn't, or did, depending on how you look at it, win the superpower lottery, because I don't have the eyes that the Uchiha were so famous for. Besides that, I'm not even sure if I exist on your clan's paperwork, since my mom gave you guys the middle finger and only ever really kept in contact with her sister." Tony wasn't exactly sure that he'd breathed at any point, but oh well.

" _…Her sister."_ Sasuke looked back down at the phone in his hands, visibly swallowing as his eyes found the name in question. Tony didn't wince in sympathy, but he definitely felt for the kid; said sister was Sasuke's grandmother.

"So, yeah. I don't have your eyes, don't have any chance of passing on the eyes, and traveling all the way to the US just to kill me was probably more trouble than it was worth." Tony tried to distract Sasuke, tried to draw the boy's eyes away from the screen. "JARVIS, hide the family tree."

Sasuke's head snapped up when the tree was gone, eyes accusing and just the slightest bit watery. The kid was nowhere near done mourning, and while Tony didn't actually know anything about helping out a kid with issues this bad, it couldn't be healthy to wallow with just a chart of names in front of him. To his credit, Sasuke seemed to realize that something was meant to be going on, and got right back to business.

" _Why are you here, then? What is it that you want?"_ Sasuke's eyes were narrowing again. " _The clan had money, plenty of it. Is that why you're here?"_

Tony groaned. "Why does everybody ask that? No, it's not the money. That's all yours. I'm not touching it."

Sasuke kept glaring.

"Kid, trust me. I don't need that money. I'm one of the richest men on the planet, and when I say that your clan's money would barely be a drop in the pond, I mean it."

Technically, the Uchiha clan as a whole had somewhere around $170 million in various assets (Pepper had gone through the files for him), which was pretty well-off for a clan of less than four hundred, but not quite on the level of Tony's $8.6 billion net worth (and always growing). The Uchiha were worth a little more than two percent of his net worth, which was really closer to a couple gallons in the pond than a couple drops, but the exaggeration was acceptable.

Sasuke looked skeptical.

"I could quite possibly buy up your entire village's government if I felt like it." Tony declared, though he wasn't _quite_ sure how much Konoha was worth. He could definitely buy up all the land, and a good chunk of the buildings, at least.

Sasuke's face didn't change.

"Ever heard of TIME magazine?"

" _Yes."_

"I've been on the cover, multiple times, if that's something you think might be important in judging my net worth." Seriously, how to convince this kid that he really was richer than the majority of the world's population… "And once you get out of here, I'll show you my private jet."

"Y _our… what?"_

"Airplane. You know, the stuff people use to fly around outside your little ninja continent."

Sasuke pursed his lips. Okay, so Tony was getting through, a bit.

" _But why are you here at all?"_ There were some words, unspoken, behind that, but Tony wasn't sure quite what the kid was trying to say. If he was anywhere near right, though, then it was probably something along the lines of 'what kind of idiot is coming near here where Itachi might get them?'

Bah.

Tony had been on the receiving end of so many death threats and kidnappings and assassination attempts that almost nothing really fazed him anymore, not unless he was in the middle of the last of the three, in which case he occasionally panicked.

Itachi wasn't here, ergo there was nothing to worry about.

"Well, you see, I'm your only living relative, and I'm a legal adult that signed all the appropriate papers and stuff, so I'm basically your full legal guardian until you get your little ninja certification in this country, and your partial legal guardian until you turn twenty here. In the US, though, I'll be your full legal guardian until you're eighteen. Of course, this is if I don't accidently blow myself up or go off the deep end." Tony mused, lacing his hands behind his head and tilting his head back to stare at the ceiling. "So you can call me Uncle or something. Uncle Tony? That sounds okay to me. What do you think, JARVIS?"

"I have no preference on the subject."

"Right, forgot about that." Tony brought his gaze back down to look at Sasuke. "So you'll be coming to the US with me and going to grief counselors and therapists and all that fun stuff until you're declared mentally healthy enough to go back to your ninja school."

The anger that flashed over Sasuke's face was almost impressive. " _No! I have to stay, have to train, I have to be ready to kill Itachi when I see him again!"_

Tony raised both eyebrows and tilted his head forward. "Uh… no. Just that would have been enough to make me take you to some shrinks, even if I didn't know the whole story. You need to get your head screwed on straight before you go back to learning how to kill people. And before you ask, the Hokage agreed to all this. He's agreed with me that you need to go to some kind of counselling before you go back to school."

Tony left out the bit that the Hokage couldn't legally enforce Sasuke's leave from the Academy. However, Tony, being Sasuke's legal guardian, _could_ , and the Hokage could also grant several months of leave to Sasuke with no repercussions other than possibly remedial classes.

Sasuke didn't seem willing to give up on his need to go back to the school as soon as possible, and appeared to be trying to think up another argument. Sadly for him, Tony was king of rambling on forever with no real substance but lots of words and time and natter.

"You'll be able to go back eventually, brat." Tony tried not to make the last word sound like an insult, because being called 'brat' by the help when he was a kid had always been better than being called 'young man' by adults that didn't realize just how much of their condescension he understood. "You just need to get back into fighting condition _mentally_ before you can get back into fighting condition physically. You'll be allowed to exercise and learn and all that, you know. You just won't be allowed near any weapons or anything too violent for a while."

Sasuke still didn't seem willing to agree and just calm down already, but he wasn't trying to argue the subject anymore, so that was _something_ , at least.

Tony smiled, and it was so very, very soft compared to his usual smirks. "You're gonna be fine, kid."

o.o.o.o.o

**April 4, 2003**   
**6:07 PM**   
**Hokage Tower, Konohagakure**

"People keep glaring at me and asking me the same question." Rhodey complained as Tony sat down in a chair outside the hospital room. "And because you took both the translators, I don't even know what they're asking."

Even as he said that, a man with white eyes and one of the dirtiest looks Tony had ever seen passed by.

Tony shrugged and, in a move that many (including Pepper and Rhodey, who only groaned or sighed at him) would deem incredibly stupid, jogged after the man and tapped him on the shoulder. "Hey, buddy, can I ask you something?"

The man raised an eyebrow, though it did nothing to minimize the angry look from before. Luckily for Tony, _this_ guy seemed to actually speak English, even if it was rather heavily accented. "I am not your… buddy."

"Yeah, sure, whatever. Not the point." Tony waved it off without much interest. "Anyway, I gotta ask, why are there so many people glaring at my friend over there? As far as I know, he's never even been on the continent before—"

"I haven't." Rhodey chimed in.

"—so there's really not much he could have done to get you guys all to hate him that easily. Is it because he's Air Force?" Tony leaned in closer to stage-whisper the next bit, because making a person think they'd been mistaken for something they hated was usually the quickest way to get them to own up to what they were actually doing, and most people didn't want to be thought of as racist, at least not publicly. "Is it because he's black?"

The man, after several seconds of staring at Tony and Rhodey alternatively, shook his head. "We assumed he was from Kumogakure, and given the grudge that many in the village hold against Kumogakure after the event that occurred several years ago…" he trailed off. "As the only country in the Elemental nations to have citizens with that color skin is Kaminari no Kuni, we immediately thought he was one of theirs. We rarely get visitors from outside the continent."

"…So it actually _is_ because he's black." Tony couldn't keep the incredulity out of his voice, because _wow_ that had never actually happened before.

"I will see to spreading the information as necessary. I apologize for any discomfort we may have all caused you." The man inclined his head, and then turned and strode off.

Tony just turned to look at Rhodey and Pepper, neither of whom had a real explanation ready. Tony made a small noise of despair.

"Fucking _ninjas."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N: I'm starting to toss in some more hints in the "modern" scenes as to what happened due to Sasuke's presence in the story, and if you notice any discrepancies compared to the movies (like the whole thing with Steve)… well, blame the ninjas.
> 
> Yes, what Tony did/said in the last scene was not exactly acceptable behavior (bringing up someone's race when you're white and they're not in that kind of situation isn't really a good thing to do), and will be addressed in the next chapter.
> 
> Ja ne,
> 
> Phoenix


	6. The Plane

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which someone gets called out for last chapter's casual racism, Tony tries to decide on a nanny, Pepper continues to be hypercompetent, Sasuke is scared of flying, and the First Doctor fights some Daleks on Tony's flat screen.

**April 4, 2003**   
**8:39 PM**   
**Aka Hou-ou Hotel, Konohagakure**

"Hey, Tony?"

"Yeah?"

"Remember what I said about how, if someone brings up me being black, that someone better be me?"

"…Shit. Sorry, sorry, sorry. I… I fucked up, didn't I?"

"All those brains and you still forget this stuff."

"…Yeah."

A sigh. A clap on the back. "Don't worry yourself about it. Just try not to do it again."

"I…yeah. Sorry."

o.o.o.o.o

**April 6, 2003**   
**10:27 PM**   
**Outside the Gates of Konohagakure**

Sasuke stared distrustfully at the plane that was currently standing on Konoha's main road, tank full and ready for take-off.

"C'mon, kiddo, it's as safe as anything else out there." Tony couldn't, in all confidence, tell the kid that the machine was _completely_ safe, because nothing ever really was, but the plane was less likely crash than a car or even a boat, though slightly more likely to get attacked than the latter (though that had more to do with Tony himself than with the plane being a plane).

Despite Tony's oh-so-impressive attempts to reassure him, Sasuke didn't look convinced.

Part of that was _probably_ due to him not having the translator out and Tony not being able to say things like that in Japanese.

(Yet.)

(Languages weren't his forte at all, but he was _trying_ , dammit.)

"Well, it's better than Roxxon's planes, anyway." Rhodey threw in with a grin, ignoring the look that Tony shot him. Roxxon's planes were… well, they weren't _terrible_ , but comparing Tony's planes to theirs was honestly more of an insult than a compliment. "Now, we better hurry, because while I _am_ on leave, that time is going to end very soon, and I'd rather not deal with trouble from my bosses on that front."

Tony didn't wince, because Tony didn't _do_ things like that, but he was more than self-aware enough to realize that many of those previous instances of Rhodey getting into trouble with the Military were mostly his fault. At least, by this point, the guys in charge had realized that Rhodey was their best bet at keeping Tony on decent terms with them, and that Tony was essentially an invaluable resource, so it wouldn't be too much of a problem, but...

Well. Better to get a move on than keep on stalling.

"Kid, I know you're scared." Tony watched out of the corner of his eyes as the words scrolled down the translator-equipped phone. "But we really do have a schedule to keep, so…"

Tony glanced helplessly at Pepper. He was trying to curb his natural "asshole" tendencies, because that was kind of something to do around a kid with as many issues as Sasuke, but… how was he supposed to get the kid onto the plane without forcing him on?

Thankfully, Sasuke seemed to finally get over his hesitation about the plane and, however slowly, began making his way over to the stairs that folded out of the side of the craft.

Tony sagged in relief for half a second, and then bounded up the steps behind his… eh, nephew was close enough. He'd use that whenever he needed to explain something, though the frequency of such occasions would be low.

When Sasuke was settled in (steadfastly ignoring everyone around him and glaring out a window instead), and Pepper and Tony were buckled into their own seats, Rhodey came on over the intercom, cheerily announcing that they were about to take off, so buckle in before you slam into another wall, Tony, you can unbuckle once we're in the air.

"He promised not to mention that again." Tony grumbled, though he noticed that Sasuke had a ghost of a smile on his face now, the phone in his hands open to the translator again.

"He's just teasing and you know it." Pepper assured him, her hand on Tony's elbow. "Now come over here and go through these papers."

"Tell me what I'm looking at." Tony said, even as he pulled the stacks towards him.

"This pile is what you need to go through before the board tomorrow morning." Pepper pointed towards the left-most stack. "This pile is résumés and reviews for potential bodyguards we could hire for Sasuke, and this pile is the same for potential nannies."

Tony took one glance at the papers for the board meeting and handed it back to Pepper. "There's a pretty good chance that I either already know or don't care about everything in here, isn't there?"

Pepper gave him a thin smile and nodded, not quite letting her amusement show. "I'll pick out the few things that have actually changed without your knowledge since the last meeting then."

"Yeah, I'll start going through these." Tony waved the stack of nanny-résumés and settled in to read.

The thing was, most of the nannies were incredibly over-qualified for general work, and Tony could understand why. These women (and a handful of men) were all experienced, yes, but they also had other things appended to their papers, martial arts and field medicine and everything the nanny for a high-profile child could possibly have to offer. They weren't just nannies, but caretakers specifically trained for taking care of children at high risk for kidnappings and assassinations. Many of them _were_ former bodyguards or military personnel, and Tony quickly found himself struggling to weigh all the options against one another, focusing mostly on their capabilities in defense (because as wonderful as the original Jarvis had been when Tony was younger, the man had been a butler, not a defender). A capable nanny in that respect meant one less bodyguard, and one less bodyguard meant one less person in the know about Sasuke.

"If I could make a suggestion?" Pepper's voice broke through his thoughts, and Tony looked up quizzically. The woman smiled and pointed to a section on the résumé Tony was currently looking at. "Most of them have a section on languages spoken. It's not a be-all end-all, but finding someone who's fluent in both English and Japanese would be a good idea."

Tony closed his eyes for a second, slightly embarrassed. He really should have remembered that, genius or not, but that was what Pepper was there for; when Tony got too focused on the details, she was there to remind him to step back and take a look at the big picture (or at least get some sleep).

He quickly flipped through the files again, sorting them into four piles: knows Japanese, knows defense, knows both, and knows neither.

The last group, small as it was, he immediately removed. The first two he kept in mind, especially since the knows-defense-but-not-Japanese pile was the largest by far, but his focus was mostly on the "knows both" pile, which had three applicants: Annalise Hoover, Berthold Rhine, and Rachel Douglas.

"Pep? What do you think of these three?" Tony pushed the papers across the table between them. "Hoover's got more experience than the other two, but the reviews say she's not exactly the best with children. Rhine's got the best childcare skills and there are people that note his ability to keep his employers' secrets, but he's a bit jumpy and panicky in bad situations. Douglas is newer than the others, but she's got better fighting capabilities, from what I can tell, and, uh…"

He didn't finish the sentence, just pointed at a spot on the page and waited for Pepper to read it.

"Experience treating soldiers with PTSD." Pepper muttered. "And a college major in psychology, focusing on treating traumatized and abused children."

"I don't know about abused, but traumatized definitely fits the bill, right?" Tony's fingers were tapping out tattoo against the table. "I'm not sure if that weighs out against the lack of nanny experience, though. I'm not sure how most of these weigh against one another. I've never had to hire a nanny before."

Pepper smiled softly, eyes tracking over the three pages. "Who are you leaning towards?"

"Douglas." Tony answered without hesitation. "The trauma thing caught my attention. But I need a second opinion."

"No, no, I agree with you." Pepper nodded, looking over all three papers again. "Rhine and Hoover are good, but I think Douglas is probably our best bet. Still, you should probably ask Obadiah and Colonel Rhodes for their input too."

"He's told you to call him Rhodey, you know."

"I know." Pepper grinned at him. "Now, we'll keep Hoover and Rhine as second and third choices, in case Douglas's interview doesn't go well, and in the meantime, you can look over the bodyguards."

Tony groaned, but pulled the pile towards himself nonetheless. This, at least, he had some more experience with.

o.o.o.o.o

**April 7, 2003**   
**7: 34 AM**   
**Malibu**

"You can survive without me for one day." Pepper readjusted Tony's collar, patting down his shoulders and smoothing out the barely-present wrinkles on his chest. "And I'll still be working, I just won't be there physically."

"I know, but the kid is… should we be leaving Sasuke alone yet? I mean, I know you'll be here, that's _why_ you're not coming with me, but I don't want to be some kind of, some kind of absent…" Tony trailed off at the look that Pepper was giving him, all fond exasperation. After a few seconds, he sighed. "What do you think?"

"Well, what did you like doing when you were his age?" Pepper asked; Tony didn't doubt that she was already planning on other things that had to be done with Sasuke that day, like explaining JARVIS and probably most modern tech. Sasuke had fallen asleep by the time they'd gotten in last night, though with the delay caused by evading a tropical storm and the subsequent stop in Hawaii for more fuel (none of the adults had been particularly interested in letting turbulence make Sasuke even more worried), this wasn't exactly unexpected. Unfortunately, that meant that Sasuke had been carried in by Tony and just left in the new bedroom, rather than receiving a grand tour and an introduction to JARVIS and co.

Tony thought back. "I don't think programming is on his list of hobbies."

Pepper raised an eyebrow. "Okay, what did you do at that age that other kids might have been doing?"

"I… watched a lot of sci-fi?" Tony scratched the back of his head. "The sort of stuff where the science was so out-there that it passed the point of bothering me."

"So, what, Star Wars, Star Trek, Battlestar Galactica…" Pepper trailed off. "I'm sorry, I only remember those three, really. Someone drilled them into my head as 'the sci-fi trifecta' when I was in high school. Drilled them into _everybody's_ heads, really; she never really stopped talking about them."

"I mean I watched and read things that were either science in name only, or fiction in name only." Tony explained. "Star Wars was 'soft' enough that I could just tell myself to ignore it all because it was barely even pretending to be science, and the same thing went for Doctor Who. Battlestar Galactica and Star Trek were a bit more… they teetered. They tried to be science, and a lot of modern science plays around with things they imagined, but… not hard enough. Not soft enough. I love them now, but as a kid? Not a chance."

"Mr. Stark," Pepper crossed her arms. "While I'm glad to know more about your childhood preferences, given that I never know when such information could be useful—"

"Really?"

"For all I know, you'll ask me about this conversation one day when you're more paranoid than usual and want to make sure I'm me and not… I don't know, a shape-shifting alien or mutant or something."

Tony thought it over for about three seconds, and then simply shrugged and nodded. "Seems like something I'd do."

"In any case, all I needed was a suggestion of a show you wouldn't mind me looking up and setting up for Sasuke to watch while you're gone." Pepper reminded him. "All I'm getting right now is a suggestion of, what, Star Wars or Doctor Who?"

"If he's going to be introduced to Star Wars, I'm going to be there." Tony said immediately; there were few things better than watching someone first get introduced to the best of the classics. "Doctor Who will work, though. Just make sure to find it with subtitles."

"If there aren't any available, I'm sure JARVIS can take care of it." Pepper reminded him. "Now, you have a meeting, Mr. Stark. I'd suggest you go."

"Right." _Going to this meeting is not abandoning the kid; just make sure you talk to him once you get back, and don't ignore him, and you'll already be doing better than Howard._

Tony tried to believe himself.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Pepper may not know what Skrulls are, but she hit the nail on the head in that respect. And no, there will not be any Attack on Titan characters showing up in this story, because that's not what this crossover is (I have something else co-starring the Young Avengers and the crew of the Serenity from Firefly for that one). However, the names Annalise Hoover and Berthold Rhine are absolutely in homage to Annie Leonhardt, Bertholt Fubar/Hoover, and Reiner Braun.
> 
> I know absolutely nothing about Battlestar Galactica, and barely anything more about Star Trek, while my knowledge of Star Wars is from watching of the movies at a very young age and not particularly enjoying them (which means I remember next to nothing, but I do remember enough to make sense of what I read on the internet, and as such can usually fake my way). Similarly, my knowledge of Classic Who is all from friends and the internet, but given who said friends are, I'm fairly certain that's more than enough (and I'm planning on watching Classic at some point in the future anyway). However, TvTropes saw fit to inform me of where all these series sat on Moh's Scale of Science Fiction Hardness, and helped me come up with a way to avoid involving the full trifecta.
> 
> Also, please keep in mind that the MCU, unlike the comics, is not Science in Genre Only, but wavers between Physics Plus and World of Phlebotinum… you know, after Thor and the other weird stuff shows up. Tony still thinks he's living in something that's more or less Real Life (the Iron Man movies would count as either Speculative Science Fiction or One Big Lie, more likely the latter). This story will hover its way over to World of Phlebotinum as I involve more and more aliens, but I'd like to point out that anything on that front is thrown out the bloody window whenever the ninjas show up, because ninjas just don't science (Tony ignores anything ninjas do that doesn't involve him, simply as a result of that fact).
> 
> Ja ne,
> 
> Phoenix


	7. The Nanny

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke's settling in and watching things that are weirder than even ninjas. Tony's trying to science up the place. Pepper is as competent and discreet as always.
> 
> Oh, and the nanny's here.
> 
> (And while Tony and Pepper have their own suspicions, the readers already know there's something strange going on. Just who is she?)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because I'm aware that such a thing is a turn-off for many readers, I feel the need to add this:
> 
> Rachel Douglas is not an original character. She is using an alias, yes, but she is a native to the Marvel Comics.

**May 12, 2012**   
**3:59 PM**  
 **Helicarrier**

“You were planning on letting him watch Star Wars?” Coulson asked, arms folded where he stood across the table from Tony. Thor, seated near him, seemed bemused, not quite understanding what Star Wars was beyond a form of entertainment. “That doesn’t exactly seem like the best choice.”

“I thought better of it later.” Tony grumbled. “Once I realized how badly some of it could probably trigger him, I decided to put it off for… a while.”

“A while?”

“Year and a half at minimum.” Tony shot back, arms crossed. He opened his mouth to continue, but was cut off by a cough from the end of the table. Turning, he saw a SHIELD medic standing there, nervously clutching a clipboard.

“Do you have something to tell us?” Fury asked after several seconds of the medic opening and closing their mouth silently, clearly unsure of how to word something.

“We’ve gotten the girl stabilized, but one of the children is demanding a large tub of water, and while we would draw a bath if we thought it could be beneficial, his wounds are too heavy for that to be safe at the moment.” The medic finally let out in one big breath.

“Wait!” Tony cut her off, seeming far too excited. “I know this one! It’s the kid with the sword, right? White hair, purple eyes, pointy teeth, etcetera?”

The medic nodded slowly.

“He’s a Hozuki. The water will help. Some weird thing to do with his biology. Warning: he’ll look like he’s disappeared at first.” Tony knew that much, at least; he’d outright demanded information on Sasuke’s planned team when they’d first been collected.

“…understood.” The medic nodded and scrawled something across her paper, though she looked doubtful of the verity of Tony’s claims. “Also, one of the boys, Sasuke? He said he’ll be coming up to see you in half an hour or so, and the taller boy will be coming with him.”

“That’d be Juugo.” Tony nodded. “Yeah, we’ll be expecting him.”

“You better hurry your story up before then, Stark.” Fury ordered. “We don’t have enough time for the details.”

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll hurry up. Anyway, I think I was about to talk about Rachel? Wait, no, the aftermath thingamajig first.”

o.o.o.o.o

 **April 7, 2003**   
**3:04 PM**  
 **Malibu**

Tony got back a good six hours after he left, annoyed and socially exhausted, though he tried not to let it show as he walked up the stairs from the garage to the main floor. Behind him, Happy locked up the car and followed along; he’d been the first person to sign the NDA, after all.

Tony paused in the doorway to get a look at the situation before jumping in. Pepper was at the bar, laptop out and a glass of water (well, probably water; she was at a bar, yes, but she was also _Pepper_ , and there was a kid in the room, so probably water). Sasuke was sitting in front of the TV, legs folded underneath him, staring at the screen in what appeared to be consternation. His eyes were flickering along the subtitles at a respectable rate, certainly better than most kids his age, and Tony realized that he’d come in just in time for the end of “The Daleks.” Thinking back, Pepper had probably done some research and skipped the first mini-arc; “An Unearthly Child” _might_ not have been the most child-friendly of arcs, especially not for a child like Sasuke.

“Guess who’s back?” Tony said.

“Welcome back, Mr. Stark.” Pepper didn’t look up from the computer she was at, so Tony walked over to look at the files spread out next to her. They mostly looked like some kind of quarterly report, which Tony promptly ignored. Sasuke still hadn’t turned away from the screen, so Tony took a seat next to Pepper and leaned against the bar.

“How was he?” Tony said lowly, not quite whispering.

“He woke up about an hour after you left. I made him breakfast and explained where you were, and he seemed… well, not disappointed, but sort of… vindictively resigned? It was kind of an ‘I expected as much,’ look.” Pepper shook her head. “I looked up the first few episodes to make sure they were okay for him, and even though it said PG, I didn’t really think the synopsis was all that promising for the first few episodes, so I explained that and I _think_ he understood, given the way he rolled his eyes at me. The second… story? The story seemed better in that sense, so I had JARVIS put that on instead.”

Tony rubbed the back of his head. “Yeah, it’s been a long time since I saw these; maybe I can show him the first arc in a year or two. Did the clothing you ordered arrive?”

“Yes, and I made sure to order through a proxy like you asked. Anyone looking at where the clothing goes will see it coming to me, and I can pass it off as being for one of my younger cousins.” Pepper pulled out a printed list of clothing she’d ordered, most of it fairly plain and inoffensive, even to someone like Sasuke.

Tony grinned. “You’re a lifesaver, Pep. Anyway, uh, it’s not too late for lunch, right?”

“I’ll order in. Any preferences?” Pepper already had her phone out, her other hand flipping through some easily-accessed PDF take-out menus on her laptop.

“Uh…” Tony glanced at Sasuke, then back at Pepper. “I could ask him? That would be a good idea, right? Make him feel at home or welcome or whatever, right?”

Pepper stamped down a grin. “Yes, it should.”

“Right, um, I’ll… I’ll go get on that.” Tony turned around and walked over to the couch, unceremoniously flopping down next to Sasuke, who flinched and subsequently stiffened, which Tony took note of for later interactions, because making Sasuke uncomfortable wasn’t exactly on his list of fun things to do when bored.

( _That_ list included things like inventing, explosions, and one-night stands.)

“So, I’m back.” He said unnecessarily. “You have fun while I was gone?”

Sasuke glanced down at the phone that was still handling all the translations, then looked back up at Tony with what was probably supposed to be a dirty look, but on a seven-year-old, it just looked cute. Tony made a vague gesture with one hand, and the translation program showed up on the wall.

“ _This show is strange.”_ Sasuke said, which was, at least, not particularly negative.

“So you enjoyed it?” Tony started running through possible replacement shows in his head. He doubted Sasuke would like any actual _children’s_ shows, but there had to be something fairly child-friendly that wasn’t overtly condescending or—

“ _It was… acceptable. If I must watch something, I would not mind it being this._ ” Sasuke’s speech was stilted, even in Japanese (which Tony still only kind of understood and had to rely on JARVIS for full translation for), as though he was trying to sound older than he was. “ _When may I return to training?_ ”

“…When you’re not obsessed with training anymore.” Tony answered. “Seriously, kid, you can do all the jogging and sit-ups you want, but I’m not comfortable letting you near a punching bag, let alone any actual sparring or whatever.”

Sasuke’s face clouded over, anger and disappointment and resentment and maybe even a bit of derision radiating out from him.

“In the meantime,” Tony continued, “You can keep studying your other stuff. The reading and writing math and science and history stuff you brought with you? That’s all fine. And you’ll have time to learn English, too.”

Sasuke pursed his lips, but that seemed to appease him, if only a little. He still seemed put out about not being able to keep practicing how to kill his brother, but—

“Actually, though, I took a look at some of your things, and while I understand why they’d frame it like that, since you’re in ninja school and everything, I may be taking your math and science schooling into my own hands while you’re here.” Tony took in the look of indignation on Sasuke’s face and… brushed it off. Yeah, making sure the kid was comfortable was important, but keeping the kid _sane_ was a bit higher on the list. “Don’t give me that look. All your problems are related to how to kill or incapacitate people or troop inventories. Besides, science and math are the areas I’m best in, and I’m already a super-genius, so, you know, you’ll be learning from one of the best minds in the business.”

 _Prodigies and genii rarely make for good teachers,_ he’d once heard.

Fuck that.

He’d _make_ it work.

When Sasuke continued to just _look_ at him, Tony sighed and stood up. “C’mon, kid. I’ll show you my workshop. Maybe you’ll see what I mean by science _then_.”

Sasuke, for all his silent complaints regarding, well, _everything_ , followed him.

o.o.o.o.o

 **April 7, 2003**   
**3:27 PM**  
 **Malibu**

Technology, for all that Tony loved it, wasn’t everyone’s schtick, and as a kid who’d grown up with less advanced tech than most western countries (ignoring the fact that the country he came from had a _very_ healthy economy), Sasuke was pretty unused to all the stuff in Tony’s workshop.

That didn’t stop him from putting his angry glare back on after only a few seconds of astonishment. The plane and projectors and other tech were strange enough, but the robot arms really took the cake; that didn’t mean Sasuke was going to let himself get carried away and surprised by every little thing.

Hence the ever-present brooding and glaring.

(Years later, when Sasuke was better-adjusted and more acceptable as a subject of teasing, Tony would inform him of the fact that he had what was commonly known as a resting bitch face.)

“Hey, DUM-E. Have you met Sasuke yet? Say hi.” Tony rubbed a hand along DUM-E’s outermost parts, checking for any loose parts or overheating. The habit was an old and usually useless one, but he still did it.

The robot arm swept around and, beeping in a pattern that seemed to connote some level of happiness, reached out and hovered just in front of Sasuke.

The boy just stared at it as though it were possessed.

“Go on, shake DUM-E’s hand.” Tony gestured, and Sasuke seemed to get what he meant without understanding the words themselves, because he reached out and shook DUM-E’s hand anyway, an irritated look on his face.

“Great! Now, come over here, I’ve got spare paper and pencils and things because most people like that sort of thing for basic math, right? Anyway, show me what you got, and I’ll see how much I need to teach you.” Tony clapped his hands and rubbed them together, almost excited.

As it turned out, Tony had rather a lot to teach his nephew.

o.o.o.o.o

 **April 9, 2003**   
**10:00 AM**  
 **Malibu**

“Mr. Stark, it may be a good idea to stop fidgeting.” Pepper whispered, watching as the car rolled up the drive. Pepper herself had taken care of the interview, to deflect suspicion from Tony (because as known as Pepper was in some circles, she certainly wasn’t as high-profile as Tony himself).

“But what if the NDA isn’t enough? Or if she’s actually an assassin disguised as a nanny? Or if—”

“Breathe.” Pepper reminded him, her polite yet distant smile, the one that said ‘welcome to the mansion and please be aware of the fact that we can have you kicked out and sued to the moon and back if we need to,’ still perfectly in place.

“Right.” Tony muttered, his eyes tracking the woman that got out of the car on the drive. It wasn’t an old car, but it certainly didn’t scream money the way his did; it was a good car for casual outings with a kid that the public didn’t need to know was important.

The woman herself had a similar look to her: pretty and reasonably young, but unassuming and easily looked over. Tan, with dark hair, hazel eyes, and nondescript bone structure, the woman just straddled the edge of racial ambiguity (though Tony would have put his money on either white, Latina, or some combination thereof).

She smiled and held out her hand as she reached the top of the steps, and Tony cautiously shook it. “You’d be Ms. Douglas, then?”

“Yes, that’s me.” The woman nodded, letting go. “It’s a pleasure to meet you in person, Mr. Stark.”

“Right.” Tony glanced at Pepper, still wary. At a small nod from her, he mentally sighed and gestured at the door. “How about we go inside so you can meet my nephew?”

“That’s perfectly fine with me.” Ms. Douglas said, following several paces behind Tony and Pepper, hands clasped in front of her. Tony found her slightly creepy, but he found most people a little creepy when he first met them, because they were all artificially polite and smile-y and urgh.

(That was part of why Pepper had caught his interest at first, after all.)

Sasuke was sitting at the bar/kitchen counter, painstakingly filling out a language worksheet. He didn’t look up until he finished whatever line he was working on, and Tony could see the suspicion in his eyes, even from where he was.

“If I may?” Ms. Douglas muttered, and Tony took a step forward, the translation program automatically flickering to life on the wall.

“Sasuke, this is Ms. Douglas. She’s going to talk to you for a bit, and if you get along well enough, then she’ll be taking care of you while I’m at work from now on.” At work, which included inventing time and business trips and meetings with the government and board and, yeah, even the occasional night out.

Sasuke’s eyes tracked over to the woman in question, and he nodded, face carefully blank. Tony would have been surprised, but he didn’t doubt that the kid had been in situations where being polite to visitors was a necessity; Sasuke had been the son of a Clan Head, and in a place like Konoha, that was important.

“ _Hello, I am Douglas Rachel._ ” The woman spoke and moved slowly and carefully, every move carefully calculated. “ _You are Uchiha Sasuke, correct?_ ”

Sasuke was quick to recover from his shock, but not, Tony noted, quick enough to hide it. So, someone speaking Japanese was surprising enough to take Sasuke off guard? That… would need to be rectified.

In any case, Sasuke nodded as soon as he recovered. “ _You are going to be my… caretaker, yes?”_

Ms. Douglas nodded. “ _I am currently the mostly likely to receive the position. I’ve taken care of children like you before._ ”

Sasuke’s expression became guarded far, far too quickly for a boy his age. “ _Like me how?_ ”

“ _High profile children with memories of things no one should experience. Soldiers, too._ ” Ms. Douglas’s voice was low, and for all that Tony didn’t really think bringing up Sasuke’s traumas was a good idea, stating it so plainly and being so up-front about it was probably the best way to gain Sasuke’s trust. “ _From what I’ve been told, you fit all those criteria, or will in the future._ ”

Sasuke nodded, not taking his eyes off her. “ _I am in training to become a shinobi._ ”

Ms. Douglas smiled and sat down next to him. _“That’s a difficult career path, I hear. Say, why don’t you tell me about yourself for now? You can tell me all the things that numbers on papers and hearsay can’t.”_

Tony leaned against the wall, arms crossed and fingers tapping out a nervous rhythm against his elbow. “You think this is a good idea?”

“She signed the NDA, Mr. Stark.” Pepper reminded him, and it always amused him, how she kept calling him that even at the point where she’d been working for him long enough to have become one of his closest (only) friends. “And you need to hire a nanny if you want to get anything done. This is the best idea we have, and you _know_ that.”

Tony made a small noise in the back of his throat. Was it really _his_ fault that he was this paranoid? He’d been kidnapped plenty as a kid, and the entire reason _Sasuke_ ended up with Tony was because of the murder of hundreds of people. A little caution was _healthy_ , really.

“They seem to be getting along, at least.” Pepper noted, and Tony had to admit she was right. Sasuke wasn’t exactly _open_ , but he was talking about as freely as he did with Tony and Pepper, and that was a pretty good sign. He was actually talking _more_ , if only because Ms. Douglas could speak his language.

“So… trial period, then? A week? A month?” Tony didn’t know how long to make it. His own nannies had always quit pretty quickly, for a variety of reasons.

“I’d say two weeks.” Pepper told him, sifting through some papers. “The bodyguards will be coming by the main building for interviews tomorrow. You can take care of those yourself, I presume?”

Tony gave an exaggerated shiver, but nodded. “Yeah, I can do it.”

Pepper put a hand on his shoulder and smiled softly. “He’ll be fine. Just keep doing what you’ve been doing for the past few days, hang out with him for a few hours a day, maybe more on weekends, and you’ll be fine.”

“…God, I hope you’re right.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry about the little blurb about Doctor Who. There will be more references in this story (Sasuke will be closeted about it as he gets older, but he will be a Whovian at heart), but Doctor Who will remain entirely fictional within the context of this ‘verse; no Doctor Who crossovers here.


	8. The Therapist

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sasuke meets his therapist, and Tony gets to play the part of the concerned parent after a nightmare.

**April 12, 2003**   
**11:28 AM**  
 **Malibu**

“ _This is ridiculous._ ” Sasuke muttered, looking like the picture of a huffy seven-year-old.

“This is something you need.” Tony replied, scrolling down a page on his laptop.

“ _I do not_.”

“You’re a traumatized kid whose current main goal in life is fratricide. Yes. You need therapy.” Tony had tried explaining it more fully before, had tried to make sure that Sasuke understood fully just why this was so necessary.

Unfortunately, Tony’s patience was quick to wane, and Sasuke was too stubborn for his own good, so by this point, Tony short answers were mostly automatic by now. Sasuke wasn’t going to listen to him anyway, so the answers were no longer anything he put effort into.

Besides, Tony wasn’t the one that scarily efficient in getting Sasuke to go. Tony was the one trying to compromise, offering to talk to the therapist before Sasuke, offering to have the bodyguards do a full pat-down, offering different rooms for the conversation to go on in, offering to make sure Tony and Pepper were the only other people in the building when it was time to speak with the woman in question (that one had actually been agreed to by all parties; Happy, Ms. Douglas, Obie, and the bodyguards were all either outside or had the day off).

Pepper was the one laying down the law.

Sasuke didn’t hate Pepper. He respected and resented her, but he didn’t hate her. Nonetheless, the glare he shot her as she lead the therapist in was twice as venomous as the one that he shot Tony.

The woman was tall, blonde, and wearing a little too much make-up for Tony’s tastes. She was, however, one of the few licensed therapists with experience in helping children that were victims of unusual circumstances. Her most frequent clients, from what her résumé said, were either child mutants, the children or siblings of mutants, or even families of mutants.

(And as only Tony could tell, a handful of ‘escapees’ from the Hidden Continent.)

Given how rare any of those were, Dr. Frost was just about the only one in her field outside the Elemental Nations themselves, and even among the few others, she was the youngest.

“Mr. Stark, Ms. Potts.” Emma Frost nodded at him and Pepper, then turned her attention towards Sasuke. “ _And you must be Uchiha Sasuke._ ”

 _Intuitive multilingual_ , the paper had said, listing it as a subset of some strangely powerful telepathic mutant bla-bla-bla… Tony tried to ignore mutant abilities when they weren’t causing him trouble, because they really were almost as ridiculous as ninjas. At least telepathy was somewhat understandable, and a lengthy conversation with Dr. Frost over the phone had assured him that she would be limiting her abilities whenever she came to the house, for everyone’s sakes, unless someone asked her to do otherwise. Mind-reading was definitely _not_ something Tony wanted happening, but hey.

NDAs and the ability to sue someone into the ground if he felt like it had to come in handy sometime, right?

Sasuke nodded, eyes trained on Dr. Frost’s. “ _They said you were like a Yamanaka._ ”

“ _A… what?_ ” Dr. Frost tilted her head, a friendly look on her face. She clearly had a lot of experience with kids, not that she was all that old herself; must have graduated young. “ _I’m afraid I don’t know what a Yamanaka is._ ”

Sasuke frowned, thinking it over. “ _They’re a clan back in Konoha, and most of them are mind-readers, and some of them are… psychologists.”_ Sasuke stumbled over one of the words, but continued valiantly. “ _You kind of look like one_.”

Dr. Frost shrugged, and Tony made himself ignore the way her chest moved, staring at the wall instead ( _she’s twenty-three_ , his brain reminded him, and yeah, the difference wasn’t _disgustingly_ big, but messing around with his nephew/cousin’s therapist was _not_ a responsible course of action, so he had to refuse to even be tempted).

“ _For all I know, I may be related to them, way, way back._ ” Dr. Frost gestured at the couches. “ _Would you like to sit down somewhere more comfortable?”_

Sasuke stared at her suspiciously, and then nodded.

“It could be worse.” Pepper noted, and Tony couldn’t disagree.

He glanced down at the résumé he still held in his hands, and his eyes lingered on the address:

_Dr. Emma Frost, Psy.D._   
_Xavier's School for Gifted Youngsters, Room 105_   
_1407 Graymalkin Lane_   
_Westchester County, NY 10461_   
_USA_

o.o.o.o.o

 **April 23, 2003**   
**4:21 AM**  
 **Malibu**

Tony woke with a start as the sound of screaming pierced right next to his ear. He shot up in bed, and the screaming grew quieter.

“JARVIS?”

“You requested I wake you if Sasuke were to exhibit signs of a nightmare.” JARVIS answered in that stilted way of his. Tony was constantly working on JARVIS’s programming to make him more human and _wow_ now was _not_ the time to start thinking about that.

“So you projected his screaming here. Good enough.” Tony flung the covers off of himself and, only pausing for half a second to slip his slippers on, rushed out of the room.

(This wasn’t the first time Sasuke had had nightmares, but it was the first time that the nightmares had lasted long enough for Tony to get there in time to do anything.)

“C’mon, kid, wake up.” It honestly hit Tony _hard_ to see the kid this messed up, and the nightmares were the cherry at the top of the shitstorm cake. After several seconds of just trying to wake him up verbally, Tony finally just reached out and shook Sasuke’s shoulder with one hand.

The reaction was instantaneous, Sasuke’s hands flying out and gripping Tony’s arm in what probably would have been a good way to break his elbow if the hands had switched positions. After a few seconds of silence, Sasuke finally spoke, rasping and still teary and pushing Tony away as hard as he could (which, for a kid that young, was really, really hard).

“Nokose.”

Tony didn’t know what that meant, but he could definitely tell what the shove meant. Slowly, he started backing away.

“Nokose!”

He sped up a little, already planning on what to do once he was out.

“Ore o hottoite!”

Tony got out, closed the door, and leaned against it. Slowly, he slid down until he was sitting on the floor, the back of his head pressed against the door. Through the thin wood, he heard the sounds of Sasuke beginning to sob as silently as he could, probably into a pillow.

Tony knew, mostly, what taking care of a child entailed. He’d always been at least a little prepared, if only in case of an accident with one of his many one-night stands ended with a bun in the oven. If Sasuke had been a lot younger, or a lot older, or his family had died any other way, Tony would have been able to deal with him a lot more easily.

But Sasuke was a seven-year-old with trust issues and PTSD and revenge fantasies, and Tony wasn’t, in any way, prepared for how to deal with that.

(Thank god he hadn’t seen any hint of the eyes.)

Dr. Frost had been helpful, certainly, and they’d already set up a schedule for her to meet with Sasuke twice a week for the foreseeable future, and she’d given him tips and hints on how to help Sasuke through these problems, but that didn’t mean that Tony was ready to care for a child this broken.

But he tried. He tried, and that would have to be enough. It needed to be enough.

So Tony got up. He got up, and he went and heated up a mug of milk and brought it back to the room, because he didn’t know what to really do, but this, at least, couldn’t hurt.

He knocked on the door. “I’m coming in.”

There was silence on the other side, and Tony wracked his head for the right translation. “Um… Ore ga… dete kuru?”

This time, there was a sniffle on the other side, followed by an angry-sounding mumble that was too muffled for Tony to understand what Sasuke was saying. With a sigh, Tony pushed open the door.

Good news: Sasuke wasn’t yelling and throwing things at him anymore.

Bad news: Sasuke still had tear tracks on his face and was curled up in the fetal position, glaring at Tony.

“I’ve got milk.” Tony offered. “Ah… gyuunyuu.”

(This word, amongst others, had amused Tony far, far too much when he learned it.)

(He couldn’t find it in himself to even grimace, let alone smile, right now.)

Sasuke sat up, glaring at Tony, but resigned to the fact that he couldn’t make the man actually leave. Tony held the mug out, and, quite slowly, Sasuke reached out and took it into his own hands. He sat on the bed, staring into the milk, and Tony slowly sat down next to him.

“…Why?”

Tony looked at Sasuke, and mulled over the question. “Well… why what? Why did I bring the milk? Why did I take you in? Why did you and your family suffer the way you did?”

Sasuke curled in on himself, knuckles turning white around where he was holding the mug. “Why… milk?”

 _Avoidance_.

“Heard it helps with bad dreams.” Tony answered weakly. “Warm kids’ drink and all that.”

Sasuke didn’t respond, and Tony chose to think he was probably trying to translate, not just ignoring him for the sake of it. A few seconds later, the translator phone was out again, and Sasuke was looking at him in askance. Tony obliged, repeating his answer, and almost chuckled when Sasuke started glaring at him again. “It’s true.”

“Why…” Sasuke trailed off, frustrated, and switched back to Japanese; Tony didn’t blame him. “ _Why are you taking care of me?”_

“Because you’re family. Because you’re a kid. Because you’ve got no one else, and you’ve been through so much that I can’t leave you alone. Because people have tried to break you, and you’re barely holding on. Because you need someone, because I fit the criteria, because I have a duty, and because it’s been a long time since I’ve had a family. Because I’ve only known you for less than three weeks and my first though when I look at you is already ‘I gotta protect this kid.’ Because you’re my little cousin and you need me and I care.”

Sasuke didn’t speak for the rest of the night.

o.o.o.o.o

 **April 23, 2003**   
**12:20 PM**  
 **Malibu**

Sasuke wasn’t related to Tony on the Stark side, but that didn’t seem to matter; math and science were an adequate distraction that he chose himself anyway.

“ _I do not understand_.” Sasuke said, and Tony looked up from the blueprints he was editing, glad that he could at least translate that little without too much trouble, and gladder still that Sasuke was speaking of his own volition again.

“Can’t understand what?” The fact that he could understand that much didn’t mean he was going to start speaking Japanese himself, yet, though. He wasn’t quite _that_ confident in his language skills yet.

“ _This problem. The wording confuses me_.” Sasuke glared at Tony, as though it were his fault, which, yeah, it probably was.

“Okay, then, bratling.” Tony rolled over on the wheelie office chair he favored at the moment, sliding up next to Sasuke, who shifted away accordingly. “What’s up?”

It was a simple problem, and Tony had it figured out before he even finished reading it, but for a seven-year-old that had only had standard education so far… well, maybe multiplication happened a bit later in most kids’ educations than Tony had thought.

(Tony’d been there at the age of three, but basically everything he’d been told had said that bringing up something like that was a bad idea, personal experience included.)

As Tony tried to talk Sasuke through the concept of multiplication, he thought back to the little toys he’d been using to practice when he’d been learning the same concepts. He was fairly certain that he had used some little thing where, when you pushed the button with the problem on it, the answer showed up, and thought that might be helpful here.

Still, he had to talk to the kid about something, and while TV and Tony’s work were alright as far as shallow things went, Tony really wanted to know a bit more about Sasuke himself.

“You feel like taking a break?” He asked, tapping a pencil against the desk. “You like tomatoes, right? I think we have some cherry tomatoes upstairs, and salads aren’t too hard to make; even _I_ know how to make them, so we can have that.”

Sasuke’s stare was growing more and more deadpan, and Tony felt some part of him relax when the kid nodded. Getting Sasuke interested in anything the days after he had nightmares was a disaster in and of itself, and Tony really didn’t know what to do, other than, just maybe…

“JARVIS, get Ms. Douglas and Pepper down here. We’re going to the beach.”

Douglas could take care of the disguises (yet another thing on that super-nanny résumé of hers). And Pepper? Well, someone had to take care of company emergencies while he was gone. She’d get a bonus, or overtime, or something like that.

It was time to go to the beach.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I would like to mention that some things (like Sasuke’s nightmare and the beach episode) aren’t actually being told to the Avengers and SHIELD by Tony in 2012. We, as the readers, see all the pertinent stuff happening in 2003 and on, but Tony’s actually rushing through a bunch of the story, skimming and skipping information when necessary.
> 
> Emma Frost has a psychology degree in Earth-616, but in that universe, it is with a focus on sexology. During House of M, however, we’re shown that she could have become a child therapist under different circumstances, basically doing what she’s doing with Sasuke here (in House of M, she was working with Franklin Richards, whose parents had died in that timeline). Within the context of this story (which is Earth-199999, for the most part, with bits and pieces from other ‘verses and fused with Naruto), she graduated young, her powers making it easier for her to learn, and achieved her doctorate in children’s psychology by the age of twenty. At that point, she went into working with children that either had superpowers or were related to those with superpowers and had suffered from some level of PTSD. The Yamanaka thing was meant as a joke, but it will be brought up again when people call up certain questions regarding shinobi clans and the X-gene later.


	9. The Beach

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the plot takes a short detour into "Beach Episode" territory.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry about the little discourse about Doctor Who monsters; you can skim past it, since it's mostly just so I can make an Ultron joke. Which is barely a joke and more just a call forward to Tony's overcompetence in the field of robots and artificial intelligence.

**April 23, 2003**  
**12:52 PM**  
**Malibu**

"Stay still, please, Mr. Stark." Ms. Douglas had a tin of some weird white _stuff_ in her hands, and she was using it to white-out Tony's hair and eyebrows, already having bronzed his skin with some water-proof, SPF 15 make-up that Tony didn't know the name of.

He was going to look _old_.

"Your fingers are on my eyebrows, and it's weird." Tony didn't like having people touch him unless it was for sexy-times, and this was decidedly not sexy.

"I'm nearly finished, Mr. Stark." The manhandling continued for several more seconds, and then she stepped back and eyed her handiwork. She nodded. "That would be enough to divert suspicion, hopefully."

Tony looked at the mirror and pouted, his fears confirmed. "I look _old_."

"Yes, and as a result, people likely won't recognize you, especially not on a beach that isn't frequented by people outside your tax bracket very often." Ms. Douglas reminded him, packing up the special effects makeup she'd used for the "magic."

"So only other rich people, then. Other rich people that see me often enough to recognize me." Tony moaned, melodramatic to the last. "Now I'm going to be recognized, _and_ I'm going to look old."

"Would you like me to add some liver spots and false wrinkles?" Ms. Douglas offered, sugary sweet, and Tony decided that she was literally the devil, because only the devil could act like that and not be weird about it.

"No. No liver spots. No wrinkles." Tony glanced over at Sasuke, who was mostly just staring at them, nonplussed. Given that the translator wasn't out, he probably didn't understand more than the occasional article adjective, but… well, tone said a lot. So did facial expression. "You okay there, kid?"

Sasuke had learned that particular phrase rather quickly, and the expression his face twisted itself into in response almost made Tony laugh. "Yes."

Ms. Douglas smiled softly, picking up the bag that held the beach supplies (Tony wasn't sure where it had come from, but he'd long ago resigned himself to the fact that the women in his life were probably hyper-competent alien robots from the future or something, because Pepper was the same way). "Ready when you are, Mr. Stark."

"Yeah. Let's go."

o.o.o.o.o

**April 23, 2003**  
**1:24 PM**  
**Malibu**

"Lucky we're this close to the ocean, and so far South, too." Ms. Douglas mused. She sat on a beach towel next to Tony, the both of them wearing sunglasses and watching Sasuke pick around in the sand a few feet from the water, too far away for the waves to do more than tickle his toes. If Tony knew that look, though, and he was pretty sure he did, then the boy would be building a fortress-like sand castle soon.

Ninjas. Ninjas with Stark relatives. Ninjas with ninja-y ninja training. Ninjas with science. Strategy. Trauma.

Of _course_ a siege-resistant tower would be on Sasuke's to-build list on the beach.

"I wouldn't have suggested it if it weren't warm enough." Tony commented. He was wearing a shirt, to hide the fact that he was not, in fact, an old man, and Ms. Douglas was wearing some sleeveless knee-length dress that was really way too modest for the beach and probably just right for a nanny.

Meh.

"I suppose."

Tony looked over at the woman he'd hired, eyebrow raised. "I know that tone. What's got you all mopey?"

"Mm?" Ms. Douglas glanced over, a smile tugging at the edge of her lips. "Memories, that's all. Memories and buried dreams."

Tony waited a few seconds for her to continue, and then, when it became clear that she wouldn't, began talking himself. "I haven't really known you very long. Doesn't really sound like something you tell people after just a week or two."

"It's not exactly a secret." Ms. Douglas's voice was strangely empty. "I wanted children once. But that's not something that seems like it's likely to ever work out for me, so I do my best to make sure the children that do exist in this world are taken care of."

Tony didn't press the issue. He wasn't sure what exactly the sentence was supposed to mean, but whatever it meant (hysterectomy? Multiple miscarriages? Some kind of poisoning that rendered her infertile? 'History' catching up to her?), it was clearly not an issue he was supposed to press. For all that he was an asshole, Tony _did_ know when to stop, and this was a _very good place to stop_.

"Right."

There was silence for several seconds, and then Ms. Douglas broke it like a wishbone. "And, if you don't mind me asking, what was your stance on children prior to Sasuke?"

"Wasn't sure. Wasn't ready. Kind of a thing that I was considering but not completely." Tony shrugged. "Always kept my options open just in case all my precautions weren't quite enough the one time it takes, but that never really happened. Only had one thing in mind, really, before Sasuke showed up."

"Oh?"

"If I had a daughter, I'd name her Eloise." Tony said, as though it was some kind of grand statement. "Not sure about the middle name. I'd probably leave that to whoever the mother was. Or the other father. Whichever. I just… I think I decided on that when I was twenty-four? I just really like the name."

"It's a fine name." Ms. Douglas assured him, as though he needed assuring. "And I'm sure that, when the time comes, your nephew will take to it quite well."

Tony snorted. "Yeah?"

"You know his history with his family better than I do. If you think he would be anything other than extremely protective of whatever child you have, no matter the other parent, then you are more foolish than I thought."

"Watch it." Tony said, though it had no bite. "I sign your paycheck."

"Ah, yes. Indeed you do." Ms. Douglas stood, strangely graceful. "I suppose I should do my job and go help Sasuke with his sand castle."

Tony levered himself to his feet and followed along. "Guess I'll see if I can teach him anything about structural engineering."

"It's sand."

"Doesn't matter."

o.o.o.o.o

**May 15, 2003**  
**2:00 PM**  
**Malibu**

" _The blue looks better._ " Tony muttered, not quite comfortable with the words themselves yet. For all his discomfort, though, he got the annoyed look from Sasuke that had been half his goal, and watched as Sasuke switched colored pencils, fulfilling the other half.

"Better." Ms. Douglas commented, and when Tony looked up, he could see the amused look on both her face and Pepper's, and he mentally cursed them both. "But your accent is still rather glaring."

"At least it's understandable, right?" Tony groused. "That counts for something."

"If you say so, Mr. Stark." Pepper said in her picture-perfect-PA voice. "You have a meeting tomorrow, by the way."

"Can I skip?"

"No." Pepper smiled at him. "It's Research and Development, and even if you wanted to skip those usually, you've already skipped two meetings this week and skipping yet another would be a… very bad idea."

"Blargle." Tony muttered in lieu of an actual curse, mindful of the seven-year-old next to him. "Is Obie gonna be there?"

"I believe so." Pepper clicked through a few things on her computer, searching for something, probably an email. "There's a chance he might cancel, but he probably won't."

"Well, at least that's one good thing." Tony mumbled. It had been a while since he'd seen Obadiah, longer than Rhodey, even (and Rhodey was overseas and on duty at the moment, so that was quite some feat). If Tony wasn't mistaken, then Obadiah hadn't even met Sasuke yet, and that was obviously something that had to be fixed. "I can bring him by the house later and finally introduce these two."

"That'll be nice." Pepper, at least, knew how important Obie was.

"Should I stay here tomorrow, or leave you to your family events?" Ms. Douglas asked, though it was mostly a question of whether she should stay out of the way or not; she was, technically, an au pair, living in the house with Tony and Sasuke, even if it was on the other side of the building. Granted, Tony hadn't ever imagined that his first offer to let a woman live in his home would be for an employee and not a life partner, but hey. Things always happened.

"Eh… Obie and I will probably end up drinking for a bit later on in the night, so you're free to come back around seven-ish." Tony ran the numbers in his head, estimating. Yeah, that sounded about right. He turned his attention back to Sasuke, who seemed very intent on filling in the diagram he was drawing. Tony was pretty sure it was a map of country boundaries detailing some decades-past war in Ninja Land, but he really didn't know, and so long as Sasuke cared to learn and it wasn't about killing people, then Tony figured it was probably alright. Still, though, all work and no play…

"Hey, Sasuke. Can you draw? Not just do this sort of stuff, but have you ever tried drawing?" _Like a normal kid_ , Tony didn't add.

Sasuke blinked at him, glanced at the wall with the semi-permanent translation projection, and then eyed Tony with that half-lidded derision that a child should _not_ have been capable of but somehow _was._ After a second, said kid was pulling out a blank sheet of paper, grabbing a silver colored pencil, and…

Huh.

Not bad.

Definitely not a masterpiece by any means.

But not bad.

"A cyberman head?"

Sasuke nodded, slowly.

"They're your favorite monsters, then?"

Sasuke paused, and then shook his head, faster.

"Which villains do you like best, then? Or which ones do you think are the scariest?"

If Sasuke suddenly became nonverbal (was that a thing? PTSD could make people lose their ability to speak or refuse to do so, but Tony didn't know if it could happen a good two months after the traumatic incident itself), then Tony was going to have even more trouble communicating than with just the language barrier.

Maybe Sasuke was just naturally quiet. Or… well, maybe the quiet wasn't entirely bad.

(He'd have to research that.)

"What was it? The Sensorites? The Daleks? The Great Intelligence?" Sure, the Second Doctor enemies were _weird_ , usually, but the Great Intelligence was… creepy.

"WOTAN." Sasuke answered, cutting Tony off before he could go any further.

"Huh." Tony scratched his chin. "And why's that?"

Sasuke sent him a baleful look and pointed at the ceiling.

"…You think JARVIS is going to try to kill us? He's a pretty good program, but I haven't quite gotten him to the point of actual AI-ness yet. I mean, I'm trying, but even when I do, I don't think he's going to try to take over the world."

" _A different one might_." Sasuke muttered. " _You make a lot of robots. One might go crazy and take over the world._ "

"Bah. If I make a robot with enough access to weapons that it can take down the world on its own, then I'll have something like that of my own, and I'll be really proud because at that point, it'll be _self-replicating_ because any conquering overlord needs minions."

"… _I'm going to ask Pepper to not let you near evil scientist things anymore_." Sasuke muttered, going back to the cyberman drawing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Really bad Ultron reference via Cybermen and WOTAN.
> 
> Also, I started with the 2005 series, so it kind of took me by surprise to see the Great Intelligence popping up as a Second Doctor monster. Didn't realize the history reached that far back.


	10. The Birthdays

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the adults have a _discussion_ , Tony has a party, and feels reign supreme.

**May 23, 2003**  
**2:00 PM**  
**Malibu**

Tony flopped down on the couch, and leaned back, whining. " _Pepper…_ "

"Yes?" Pepper was looking through some paperwork. _Boring_.

"The Board is being annoying again."

"Hm." Pepper didn't look away from the paperwork she was flipping through. "How so?"

"They want me to find someone and get _married_." Tony whispered, as though it were some great secret. "And I don't want to."

"Well, I've never been married, so I can't say if it would really be as bad as you think." Pepper passed him the clipboard and pen. "Read it and sign here. Initial here, here, and here."

"Fine." Tony pouted as he did as he was asked. "Rhodey's not married. _Obie's_ not even married. Why do I have to get married?"

"Because you're a public face, Mr. Stark." Pepper answered, already going on to the next set of papers. "Getting married would look good for the company, and if the CEO looks good…"

"Then stocks go up, I know." Tony stuck his tongue out, and then tilted his head back to look at the ceiling. After a few seconds, he changed gears and turned to look at the kitchen. "Sasuke! _Do you plan on getting married when you're older?_ "

Sasuke looked up from his 'homework' with a look of surprise and, Tony was a bit dismayed to see, a hint of nervousness.

"…Yes." Sasuke bit his lip, thinking hard as he tried to find the right words in English. "I need to… make my family bigger?"

 _I need to continue the family line/restore the clan_. Tony translated mentally. " _You don't seem to like the idea._ "

Sasuke made a face. "Girls are…"

Words failed him.

That was okay.

Tony could fill in the blanks, and those blanks mostly involved a bunch of cooties. Sasuke was a little young to know anything else yet.

" _That's okay. You have time_." Tony grinned, then scanned the room for his last victim. "Ms. Douglas! What about you? You ever get married? Engaged? Anything like that?"

"I'm a widow, actually." Ms. Douglas's smile was frosty. "And I spent a very long time in a committed relationship that could not be legitimized by the government."

Sasuke was frowning up at her, no longer paying attention to the work in front of him. When he spoke, Tony welcomed the distraction from the awkwardness. "Widow? Le…le-gi-ti-mize?"

Ms. Douglas repeated the sentence in Japanese, and realization dawned on Sasuke's face. "You mean you could not marry him?"

"Her." Ms. Douglas corrected. "And that little word was the problem. There aren't many countries that have legal same-sex marriages."

Sasuke tilted his head, nose scrunched up in a look midway between confusion and disgust. "But… there are plenty of people like that in Konoha? And they are married."

"Well, I was not capable of traveling to the Elemental Nations at the time, nor was I aware of that law." Ms. Douglas smiled down at Sasuke and carded a hand through his hair. "It's been a number of years since she died, anyway. There's not much that information could do for me, now."

As though feeling the silent question, Mrs. Douglas spoke shortly, refusing to look in Tony and Pepper's direction. "She died of cancer. My husband was…" She trailed off, lips pursed.

"You don't have to tell us," Pepper said gently, though she didn't look up. Tony's eyes had fallen to the papers in his hands, vocal chords seemingly paralyzed. He was _not_ good at awkward situations unless he had free reign to insult everyone in the room.

The people currently in the room were _not_ people he wanted to insult.

"It's fine. It was just a very complicated situation, and I'm not altogether proud of how I handled my part." Ms. Douglas's smile was brittle, but at least she didn't seem very angry.

"Right. So. Moving on. The board." Tony paused. "It's composed of idiots."

"I'm aware, Mr. Stark." And then Pepper just shoved another paper under his nose.

"No, Pepper, you don't _understand_ —"

"My apologies, Mr. Stark, but I appear to have contracted a case of involuntary selective hearing. I'm afraid you'll have to tell me later." Pepper smiled down at her work, well aware that Tony wouldn't even frown at her, let along consider firing her as so many other bosses would have.

They really did make a good team.

o.o.o.o.o

**May 29, 2003**  
**5:52 PM**  
**Malibu**

"He'll be fine." Pepper handed Tony his tie as he came out of his room, mostly-dressed. "This is something you do every year, and even he understands that you need to do this to keep people from getting curious about what you're doing."

"It still makes me feel guilty." Tony pursed his lips as he knotted his tie. He remembered being that age, having to deal with being left at home during events. Granted, there had been plenty that he'd been forced to go to as well, and he'd hated those, but being left behind had been even worse.

"You already promised to spend all of tomorrow with Sasuke." Pepper reminded him, holding up his jacket so that he could slip in. "And as much as you care for him, you need to remember that Sasuke's still very… reluctant to grow close to you."

Tony hid his wince. Hell, the situation was plenty understandable. "Yeah, I get it. It's still… not something I'm all that happy about."

"Mr. Stark, this is just another party, and you've gone to plenty of those since Sasuke started living here. I don't think you need to worry about him quite that much. Just make sure you're free to spend time with him tomorrow. Besides," Pepper smiled, "Do you really remember caring about anyone's birthday other than your own at that age?"

"Don't remind me. I'm getting old." Tony made a face. "I'm getting _old_ now."

"Sir, if I may point out that you're only thirty-three?" Pepper smiled, even though she was eyeing him rather critically. "You aren't very old."

"It's okay, Pepper. I'm old. I'm going to be, like, a silver fox or whatever." Tony fiddled with his cuff-links. "You're sure I have to go?"

"Obie will be there, and so will Justin Hammer."

" _Hammer?_ "

"The board decided that, since this party was a more public event, it would be helpful to bring in some of the people we do business with. Besides, I've seen you around Hammer before. You two just take pot-shots at each other the whole time. Well, you do, at least, and you seem to enjoy it." Pepper smoothed out one of the wrinkles on Tony's lapels. "Now, Happy's waiting outside with the car."

"Right. I'll see you there?"

"Yes, you will."

o.o.o.o.o

**June 14, 2003**  
**8:05 AM**  
**Malibu (Office)**

"I just don't know what to get him, Pep." Tony dithered as he paced around his office. "I mean, I know what he _likes_ , but I still don't like the idea of giving him any weapons, and I get the feeling that he wouldn't _let_ himself play with any of the toys that we can get based off of the books or shows he likes, and science-y stuff is basically just 'ask and ye shall receive' at the moment."

"You have over a month to decide, Mr. Stark. Which, might I remind you, is a month longer than you have to put together a proposal for next month's R&D budget." Pepper tapped a pen against her clipboard. "And if I may make a suggestion? Dr. Frost mentioned that Sasuke was doing well. While I doubt anyone would be happy with giving him weapons right now, it may not be a bad idea to start easing him back into his shinobi lifestyle."

"Pepper…?"

"I'm not saying you should give him weaponry or get him back into outright learning how to kill, but maybe just something to show him that you're starting to trust him with his own life again." Pepper shrugged.

"That… actually, that makes a lot of sense." Tony leaned back in his seat and thought it over. "I… this is going to sound a bit weird, but what about Sun Tzu's 'Art of War'? It's not that violent, I think, but it could teach him strategy and life-lessons, and I know a lot of people use it for everyday things and not warfare."

"That sounds like a great idea, but I would suggest running it by Dr. Frost first." Pepper finally handed the clipboard over, and Tony began skimming through it. "Good intentions don't change the fact that, as much as something may seem like a good idea, you are not qualified in that field, and making decisions based on vague information will eventually lead to some mistake."

"Yeah, but you were _right_ , though. It's actually a pretty good idea." Tony bit his lip. "I guess I could ask Dr. Frost the next time she comes over."

As it turned out, she approved wholeheartedly.

o.o.o.o.o

**July 7, 2003**  
**8:05 AM**  
**Malibu**

"Pepper, can you please handle whatever kind of party we're going to have for Sasuke, because I'm pretty sure I'll end up getting it wrong and you're the only one I trust with this sort of thing." Tony babbled this out very quickly and without much breath.

"…Mr. Stark, while I am sure I would be able to handle this, wouldn't Ms. Douglas be a better choice? She does spend more time with him than I do. She's closer to him than I am." Pepper spoke hesitantly. "She's spent more time with him over the past three months than anyone barring perhaps you."

"I don't know how to ask her without insulting her, and I know that's not something I'm usually worried about, but I don't want to have to hire another nanny."

"Because the less people that know about Sasuke, the better?"

"Yeah." Tony rubbed the back of his neck. "I just… I remember the kinds of parties I had as a kid, and I hated them, because they were mostly just friends of my dad's that got an excuse to come over, and some of them were okay, but there was never anyone my age there, and the other parties were all publicity stunts, and I couldn't do either of those for Sasuke even if I wanted to, so… I don't know how to host a birthday party for an eight-year-old."

"I'll talk to her." Pepper said, and then raised a hand before Tony could thank her. "But, if I can make a suggestion? Ask her to walk you through the process so that you can do it yourself once you need to."

"…That's probably a good idea." Tony admitted. "Though I can't say I'll be any good."

"All you need to do is try. Aren't you supposed to be the Da Vinci of our time? You can figure out a simple party, right?"

"Science-y smarts are not the same as social-y smarts. Or family smarts." Tony reminded her. "But I _can_ try."

"Yes you can."

o.o.o.o.o

**July 23, 2003**  
**7:13 AM**  
**Malibu**

"Happy Birthday!" Tony opened the door to Sasuke's room, then deftly dodged the small toy (a rubber ball) that came hurtling at his head. Well, ninja genes bred true or something. Oh well. "You're eight years old now! Aren't you glad?"

Eight wasn't exactly a significant age in most places, but it was still another year to add to Sasuke's count, and surviving another year actually _had_ been something of an achievement for the boy. Given the dirty look he was giving Tony right now, he wasn't appreciating being reminded of that fact.

"It is early. Why are you not asleep?" Sasuke scrunched up his nose. "Or working? It is… Wednesday."

"It is also your birthday, so I'm calling in sick today." Tony put the wrapped present on Sasuke's bed with a grin. "So, happy birthday, and here's your gift."

Sasuke blinked at Tony, but rather than eyeing him in suspicion, just turned curious eyes on the package. "Gift?"

"Gift. Present. A thing that people give you on holidays." Tony gestured at the shiny wrapping paper. "Go ahead. Open it."

Sasuke shook his head as though to get rid of the cobwebs, and then picked the package up. "…later. Food first."

"You're not getting cake for breakfast." Tony immediately said, because that was something he remembered seeing in books and TV shows and stories from Pepper and Rhodey about younger cousins.

"…Bacon?"

"Not just bacon. Bacon and eggs work?"

"Yes… if there are tomatoes."

"Bacon and eggs and tomatoes it is!" Tony held a hand out to Sasuke with a grin. "You want a piggy back ride? I won't complain about it wrinkling my clothes, I promise."

Sasuke rolled his eyes (success!) and pushed his way past Tony, present held loosely in his hands.

Tony outright whistled as they made their way down, and waved hello to Pepper and Ms. Douglas as he got to the kitchen. "Bacon and eggs today! Oh, and tomatoes."

"I'll take care of that." Ms. Douglas said, already moving about to fry the meal. She pulled out a package from her pocket and placed it on the counter at Sasuke's usual seat. " _Happy Birthday, Sasuke._ "

" _Thank you_." Sasuke sat at the counter, staring at his hands and swinging his legs where they hung from the stool.

"Happy birthday." Pepper added, and passed over a parcel of her own. "How does it feel to be one year older?"

"…It is a…" Sasuke screwed his face up and looked as though he was trying to remember a difficult word. "A miracle."

Pepper's smile stiffened, but she patted his shoulder and sat down next to him. "Well, you've got your whole life ahead of you, right? You got a chance, and now you can make the most of it."

"I guess." Sasuke looked down at the presents, and then pulled Pepper's towards him. He began picking at the wrapping paper, and pulled out a book. It was in English, but visibly children's literature. He looked at the title and began sounding it out. "H… Harry Potter and the… Phi-lo-so-pher's Stone?"

"A few of my cousins have been reading this series." Pepper began explaining the choice. "It started coming out a few years ago, and that's the first book. There's also a movie, but I figured it would be good for you to have something interesting to practice reading English. It's not exactly similar to the things I've seen you watching before, but I thought you might enjoy it."

"Thank you, Ms. Pepper." Sasuke put the book to the side, but his eyes lingered, and Tony was glad to see the spark of interest in them.

"Nice choice." Tony whispered into Pepper's ear. He watched as Sasuke pulled Ms. Douglas's gift closer and began slitting the paper to get it off. "I haven't read it yet, but I've heard a lot about it. Isn't the end a bit…?"

"I read it first to make sure it was child-friendly, or close to, and asked Dr. Frost as well. There's some violence towards the end, but the enemy is pretty clear-cut and the morality is still pretty black-and-white." Pepper answered. "It should be fine."

"Huh." Tony watched as Sasuke opened the black box that had been inside the paper, and pulled out a circular metal contraption and a string. He looked rather confused, but Tony could feel some childish glee rising up in him.

"What is this?"

"It's a gyroscope!" Tony darted around the table and sat down next to Sasuke with a grin. The room was filling with the smell of eggs and bacon by now. "Do you want me to show you how to use it?"

Sasuke nodded silently, and watched as Tony threaded a string through the hole in the axle, wound it up, and then set the centerpiece spinning. Carefully, he set the whole thing down on the table and let it stand upright on its own, and then handed the string to Sasuke. "Hold this out and keep it taught."

Sasuke did as he was asked, eyes staring at the spinning metal. Tony picked the gyroscope up and, ever so carefully, put it down on the string, where it stayed, balancing upright perfectly.

"How?" Sasuke asked, tilting the string from one side to the other.

"Physics! I'll teach you about centripetal forces and all that later if you want." Tony clapped his hands and rubbed them together. "Seriously, though, the physics that's based on spinning and other circle-y stuff is weird but interesting."

"Aa." Sasuke continued to stare at the gyroscope, seemingly entranced.

"Wait, one more trick." Tony took the gyroscope, which was still spinning, then held it sideways and looped the string around one end. He lifted it up off the table, and watched as Sasuke's eyes widened at the way that the gyroscope didn't fall. Sure, he'd seen plenty of weird tech in Tony's lab… but the gyroscope _wasn't_ complicated; it was just a wheel, axle, and frame, and that made it all the more impressive. Tony was actually pretty impressed by the gift: it was both childish enough to be fun for a kid Sasuke's age, yet also science-y enough that it didn't seem like an insult.

"Breakfast is served." Ms. Douglas laid out a pair of plates for Sasuke and Tony, then went and got her own and Pepper's as well.

" _Thank you, Ms. Douglas._ " Sasuke said, and there was warmth in his voice, even if it sounded a little stilted and awkward.

" _You're welcome_." Ms. Douglas smiled and pointed at Tony's gift. " _There's one more, though, so as soon as you're done with your breakfast, you can see to it as well."_

Sasuke nodded, then glanced over at Tony and down at the red-wrapped present on the table. He quickly dug into his food, ignoring the adults as they talked about plans for the rest of the day. The food was polished off quickly enough (well, there might have been a bit of egg left, but the bacon and tomatoes were _totally_ all gone), and then Sasuke started fiddling with the packaging, not particularly willing to draw attention to himself, just waiting for the conversation to peter out and turn back to him.

(The conversation did end quickly enough, if only because the adults had all been watching him out of the corners of their eyes the whole meal.)

Sasuke opened the paper as slowly as he had with the other two, and then blinked in surprise down at the object he held in his hands. Well, two objects. Two books, one in English, and one in Japanese.

" _The Art of War, by Sun Tzu_." Sasuke stared. " _I've heard of this book, but… you said I'm not supposed to look at anything involving fighting or war until Dr. Frost says it's okay._ "

" _She did_." Tony answered. " _You're not going to start training again or anything, but I trust you enough to let you start looking at this sort of thing and some of your gorier history stuff again._ "

Sasuke looked at Tony, and then down at the book again, and finally just got up from his chair and came closer. Tony raised an eyebrow as Sasuke didn't look up from the book in his hands, but completely froze up, face stuck in an expression of complete surprise, when Sasuke (slowly, hesitantly, stiltedly) leaned forward and wrapped his arms around Tony's waist.

Oh.

Sasuke was hugging him.

Tony looked down and carefully brought his hands up to hug Sasuke back, one hand petting his head like a particularly large cat. He looked in askance at Pepper and Ms. Douglas ('is this really happening?'), but that surprise was nothing compared to when Sasuke spoke.

"Thank you, Uncle Tony."

Uncle.

Sasuke had called him _Uncle_.

Three months, and he finally…

Tony grinned, wide and slightly silly, and hugged Sasuke as tightly as he could without it hurting his nephew. "Happy Birthday, kiddo."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ended up much longer than expected. But hey! Sasuke's finally eight, and there are at least a handful of people that might be starting to figure out who the mysterious nanny is.
> 
> And look! A whole chapter without any mention of Doctor Who. Be proud of me.


	11. The Return

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sasuke has to go back 'home.'

**August 4, 2003**   
**10:07 AM**   
**Los Angeles**

"Are you sure?"

Tony wasn't worried. He wasn't anxious or dismayed or put out or anything like that, seriously. He was an adult. An adult-y adult. He knew what was necessary.

"While I'd prefer it if he never went back to that lifestyle, he's certainly arrived at the point where it wouldn't be any more detrimental to his mental health than if his previous trauma hadn't occurred." Dr. Frost's voice was calming over the phone line, and Tony forced himself to take a deep breath. Right. Okay. That was a thing.

"Are you sure he doesn't need a few more months?"

"Attached, are we?" Dr. Frost laughed, though not unkindly. It was a strange sound, especially over the phone, like clinging diamonds. "Like I said, it would be best for him to never go back to that sort of work again. Unfortunately, what little you've told me about the situation, that doesn't seem to be an option, so I'm telling you that he's as ready as he'll ever be to get back into the game."

"…I don't want to let him go back." Tony leaned back in his chair, hand up to his temples. "I really, really don't want to let him go back to that life. You've heard what it did to his brother, and I grew up with a lot of stories from my mom on the subject… it's just… it's not…"

"I get it, Mr. Stark, I really do." Dr. Frost sighed. "You're his legal guardian, so it's really all down to you. You're the one that has to weigh the risks and make the decision."

"No pressure or anything." Tony muttered.

"I do have some unrelated good news, if you want to hear it." Dr. Frost offered, sensing that there was nothing left for her to say on the previous subject.

"Go for it." Tony sat back in his chair, twiddling a pen in his hand.

"I've spoken to Professor Xavier, and Sasuke is free to visit in a few months' time." Dr. Frost told him, and Tony had to agree that that was probably good news. "We've been dealing with some legal trouble with a certain student recently due to the fact that he was an unregistered German minor when we picked him up a few years ago, and still is, but that should blow over fairly soon, and Sasuke can visit once it has."

"That's probably a good idea. I'd like for him to have some friends his own age here in the States." Tony made a face. "I certainly didn't have any 'til college, and look how I turned out."

"Well, you didn't turn out terribly bad, but some friends would be beneficial to Sasuke's mental health, yes." Dr. Frost, Tony guessed, was probably smirking right now. "In any case, I think some of the students would benefit from his stories of the Elemental Nations and their shinobi clans."

"I can imagine." Tony levered himself up from the slouch he'd sunk down into over the course of the conversation and switched the phone to his other ear. "So, is there anything else I need to know?"

"Not at the moment. I'll see you on Saturday, Mr. Stark."

"See ya then, Doc."

o.o.o.o.o

**August 4, 2003**   
**12:27 AM**   
**Malibu**

"I want to go back to… the Academy." Sasuke's answer was immediate and resolute. "As… _as soon as possible."_

Tony didn't let his disappointment show, though Pepper did no such thing. Ms. Douglas didn't react much at all; her contract stipulated that wherever Sasuke went, she would go as well. "No chance of staying here in the States with Uncle Tony, then, huh."

Sasuke shook his head, though he seemed pleased that Tony wasn't forcing the issue. " _I need to go back. I need to be able to fight Itachi._ "

Tony's thoughts ran somewhere along the lines of: _well, at least it's not 'to kill Itachi' anymore._ "You'd be just as safe if you stayed here. Safer, even, given what the fallout of hurting you would be."

" _If Itachi were to decide to kill me now, I would not be able to defend myself, and the bodyguards you hired would do no better. They are very good at defending against non-shinobi threats, and likely against ninjutsu and taijutsu users, but genjutsu is totally different_." Sasuke had clearly been working on these arguments for a while. " _I need to learn how to be an effective shinobi before I can do anything else. I need to be able to defend myself against Itachi, and then take him out whenever possible so that he doesn't do anything bad like that again._ "

Aaaaand there was the 'need to kill Itachi' bit again.

"All things considered, I can't start a war between the US and the Elemental Nations by refusing to let you go back. I also can't afford to let you stay defenseless against your brother." Tony shook his head. "As much as I hate doing this, I'm letting you go back."

Sasuke's face brightened. "Tha—"

"But!" Tony held up a hand to pause him, and Sasuke froze in place, awaiting the caveat. "You have to come back and visit every once in a while, alright? Long weekends, holidays, vacations, whatever. You tell me when you have free time like that as soon as possible, and I'll have a plane ready whenever necessary, okay?"

Sasuke nodded slowly. "Is there… anything… more?"

"Anything else." Ms. Douglas quietly corrected him.

"Is there anything else?" Sasuke repeated, this time with the correction.

"I'm giving you a phone and a laptop to take with you." Tony said, now quite serious, and switching to Japanese to make things easier for Sasuke to understand; Tony's Japanese was nearly fluent by this point. " _I want you to keep the phone on, charged, and with you whenever possible. You can set it to silent when you're in class, but if there's ever an emergency, Pepper or I will call you as soon as possible, and you'll need the phone for that. Ms. Douglas will have one, too, though the only Stark Tech that one has is an enhanced battery life and signal. The computer has a built-in camera, and I want you to call me with video chat every night, alright? You'll also keep meeting long-distance with Dr. Frost on Saturdays the same way."_

Sasuke nodded slowly, and glanced at Ms. Douglas.

" _I'll remind you_."

"Oh, and I'll also be sending along some books on science-y stuff for you to read." Tony switched back to English and the light-hearted tone he usually used. "I want you to have some non-ninja stuff to entertain yourself with whenever possible, and to practice your English, okay? I'll get the rest of the series you've been watching downloaded onto some DVDs so you can watch that when you want to, and some more sci-fi books, too."

Sasuke tilted his head, eyes narrowed. "How much science… do you want for me… to learn?"

Tony shrugged. "As much as possible? Seriously, whatever your chakra does or whatever you want it to do, knowing _some_ science is gonna be helpful. Like, a lot. If you understand how something works, making it work is going to be a lot easier."

Sasuke rolled his eyes. " _You just think math and science are the most important subjects._ "

"I'm biased, so sue me. Actually, don't. We're related and that would be messy, and you're a minor, so that would be weird for everyone. Also, I don't want you in a court because that would mean people knowing who you are and that would be bad." Tony made a face.

"Right…" Sasuke shook his head. "When do I go?"

Tony winced. " _I think your school semester is halfway done, so really, whenever you want. I'm thinking of having us ship out in a week. You were ahead before we left, right? You should still be fine to get back into the game once you get back to the Village Hidden in the Leaves_."

Sasuke nodded. "I… cannot wait."

"Yeah… you're the only one, kid." Tony muttered, audible to no one but himself.

o.o.o.o.o

**August 13, 2003**   
**2:42 PM**   
**Konohagakure no Sato, Hokage Tower**

Tony, for all his hesitation to let Sasuke go back, was pleased to see how happy the kid was at seeing his home again.

He wasn't quite as pleased to see the Hokage again, but the man had his respect, so Tony held out a hand to shake as soon as they were within distance, not quite sure whether he should be doing this or bowing, but it didn't seem to matter either way, considering how that the Hokage shook his hand in return.

"I see that Sasuke-kun is doing better?" The Hokage nodded down at the boy.

"Well, I'm pretty sure he can answer that for himself." Tony said, remembering all the times he'd hated people speaking for him when _he_ was a kid.

" _I think I'm doing better."_ Sasuke said, looking away, down and to the side. " _But I'm going to keep talking to Dr. Frost._ "

The Hokage quirked an eyebrow and looked up at Tony.

"Psychologist. She's been working with him for the past few months." Tony shrugged, though he paid careful attention to the Hokage's reaction, even if the whole ninja thing probably meant he was hiding his real thoughts on the issue.

"I see. I take it she's good at what she does, then?"

"Top of her field." Tony assured him. "So, I think you remember Pepper, and I'd like to introduce you to Rachel Douglas, Sasuke's nanny/caretaker/whatever you'd like to call her so long as it's applicable and not going to get anyone killed."

The Hokage and Ms. Douglas both raised eyebrows at that, but Tony was pretty used to that expression at this point; he got it from just about everyone he knew personally.

"Miss Douglas, then?"

"Ms. Douglas, yes." The woman corrected him as she shook his hand. "I'll be staying with him until such a time as Mr. Stark sees fit to release me from my duties, or my contract runs out."

"I see. Well, you'll have to fill out some paperwork to stay in the village. It would normally take much longer, but due to the circumstances—"

 _Because Sasuke's the heir to one of the most important clans in the village and Mr. Stark has incredibly large amounts of money,_ Tony mentally filled in.

"—one of the shinobi downstairs should be able to get you set up within a few hours." The Hokage looked over at Sasuke again. " _Now, as to your living situation…"_

" _I want to live at my old house."_ Sasuke said, face set in as stubborn an expression as he could make it. Tony and the Hokage glanced at each other.

"Not happening." Tony said.

" _Maybe in a few years."_ The Hokage allowed. " _There were a number of empty homes in the Uchiha compound before, so you can continue to live there, but I would prefer it if you didn't live in a house with too many… memories._ "

Sasuke pursed his lips and crossed his arms, but didn't argue outright, so Tony supposed that was good enough.

" _Other than that, I believe we only need to get you reassigned at the Academy, and that can be done the morning you begin classes again."_ The Hokage nodded slowly, as though reaffirming the decision to himself. " _Anyone have any other concerns?_ "

"A working schedule for when I can drag him away back to the States?" Tony noted the Hokage's amused smile, shrugged, and moved on. "Like, can I get an academic schedule or something, so that I know when the long weekends and the holidays are?"

"I believe that would be doable, yes." The Hokage smiled. "Now, is that all?"

"Yeah, I think so." Tony looked around for a second, gauging the expressions of everyone in his party. "Yeah. That should be it."

"Then I suppose this is goodbye."

Tony's throat was suddenly very, very dry. "Guess it is."

o.o.o.o.o

"Don't forget to call me." Tony had his hands on Sasuke's shoulders, and was looking him in the eye, quite serious.

"I will not forget."

"And keep your phone charged and with you at _all times_."

"I will."

"And have your computer open and hooked up to the internet on Saturdays so that you can meet with Dr. Frost."

"I will."

"And—"

"Mr. Stark." Ms. Douglas came and put a hand on Tony's arm, very, very lightly. "I can assure that, should Sasuke forget to do anything you've asked, I will be there to remind him."

"Right." Tony took a deep breath. "Right, I just…"

"You worry. I understand." And she did, Tony later found out; she understood far more than he thought.

But _that_ is a story for a later time.

"Yeah. I just… take care of yourself, alright, kid?" Tony's hands tightened minutely on Sasuke's shoulders.

"I will be fine, Uncle." Sasuke shifted awkwardly, and Tony guessed, or at least thought he might know, what the problem was.

Tony pulled Sasuke into a tight hug. "I'm gonna miss you, kiddo."

"… _I'll miss you, too, Uncle._ "


	12. The School

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Tony and Sasuke finally visit Xavier's. Finally.

**August 14, 2003**  
**9:34 PM**  
**Malibu**

"Hey, kiddo." Tony grinned down at his laptop. Sasuke was framed on the screen, looking supremely bored, and Ms. Douglas was sitting behind him, reading a book. "So, first day back at school. How'd it go?"

Sasuke made a face, and Tony chuckled. Most kids had a reason for hating school, so he hadn't expected Sasuke's to be any different. "Okay, clearly not as well as I'd hoped. I thought you'd enjoy going back to your ninja training?"

"School is fine. The problem is my…" Sasuke paused, made a frustrated noise, and had a quick, hurried conversation with Ms. Douglas. Tony waited patiently. "The problem is my classmate…s."

Tony raised an eyebrow. "Go on."

"They ask where I was."

"And you said…?"

"That… I was with a… re-la-ti-ve in the Outer Countries." Sasuke made a face. "Then they ask more questions."

"You tell them it was none of their business?"

"Yes." Sasuke said bluntly. "They also ask about Ms. Douglas, but she can handle that herself. I just say that she is, ah…nanny?"

"Yeah, nanny." Tony tapped a pen against the desk. "If that's all, then it's better than I expected."

Sasuke muttered something, voice low and using Japanese, so Tony didn't actually understand any of it. "Mind repeating that?"

"…the girls are… _kimyouna_." Sasuke seemed frustrated, though whether that was due to the girls or not being able to remember the word was up for debate; Tony would have put money on both.

"Strange or weird," Ms. Douglas said, and Sasuke nodded, face still scrunched up funny.

"Strange _how?_ " Tony asked, though he had his own suspicions; eight was about the right age for, well—

"They go…" and then Sasuke clasped his hands together, pasted a sickly sweet smile on his face, and squealed, "Sasuke-kun! Sasuke-kun!"

His face dropped back down to its usual deadpan in such a nonchalant way that Tony took a few seconds to process it, at which point he began laughing uproariously.

"It's not funny!"

"It is absolutely funny, and you'll understand why in a decade or so." Tony wiped at his eyes. "Nah, just tell them you're not interested in girls that come on too strong. Or just girls in general."

Sasuke stared blankly at him, and Tony remembered that idioms weren't exactly the sort of thing people picked up immediately when learning a language, and while four or so months completely immersed in the language was definitely going to lead to some language skills, especially at Sasuke's age, 'coming on strong' was still a bit out of his way.

Ms. Douglas, as usual, came to the rescue and translated for them.

Sasuke, as usual, sent an unimpressed look Tony's way, and shook his head. "I will just ignore them."

"That won't work," Tony warned him.

Sasuke, as per usual, just rolled his eyes and went on with his life.

o.o.o.o.o

**October 11, 2003**  
**1:03 PM**  
**Malibu**

"You can understand why I don't want any unnecessary visitors," Professor Xavier said, smiling pleasantly at Tony through the screen; he'd already signed the NDAs. "And while I understand that you would prefer to have your own security with you, I must ask that you leave behind everyone barring yourself and your nephew."

"I get it, it's just…" Tony rubbed the back of his neck. "Ugh. I'm not all that fond of the idea of running around New York without some kind of guard."

"This is a school, Mr. Stark." Prof. Xavier reminded him. "And due to its nature, we have plenty of our own protection as well."

Tony pursed his lips. Prof. Xavier had been hinting at what was so special about the school for almost as long as Dr. Frost had, and Tony was getting a little annoyed by it. "I'm getting pretty curious about why you guys have such good security. Dr. Frost's been hinting at something weird about the students, and I've got my suspicions, but…"

"Just as I signed an agreement with you to keep your nephew's existence a secret, and just as you asked that the other permanent residents of the school do, I will ask of you to do the same concerning the school's secrets." Prof. Xavier's pleasant smile never wavered, and Tony's eyes narrowed in the same suspicious they always did when it came to this man.

Prof. Xavier looked far too young to have been born in the earlier half of the twentieth century.

The man was almost out of his sixties, and, while completely bald, he was barely wrinkled. It was suspicious, and unnerving, and Tony needed to know what was going on.

"Nothing illegal going on there, I hope." Tony hedged, feigning disinterest.

"While unaware of our exact location, the government is aware of our existence and purpose, yes. Or SHIELD is, at least." And there it was; the name of the weird-as-hell alphabet agency that Howard had worked with for the better part of four decades. Tony rarely dealt with them directly, but he'd been involved in selling them tech and weapons since he'd taken over Stark Industries. He still wasn't completely sure what it was that they did, but they were sanctioned by the UN, and the tracking of where the weaponry went all seemed solid, so he kept it up. The fact that Professor Xavier was associated with them was… interesting. "We're a _school_ , Mr. Stark, not a military training facility."

"I get it, I do. Just… I hope you don't mind if I _do_ bring something to defend myself with anyway." Tony could deal with going somewhere without bodyguards, especially a school that was hiding secrets.

"I should warn you that there are a handful of teachers here that will happily eviscerate you if you hurt any of the students." The pleasant smile was still there. Creepy.

"Okay, two things: one, I'd never hurt a kid. Anyone who would deserves whatever nasty stuff's coming for them. Two, I've _met_ Dr. Frost. Quite a few times, actually. I know what she'd do to me if I hurt a kid in front of her, and none of it's nice. I wouldn't be surprised if you had a few more like her stashed away in that grand old building of yours." Tony held back a shudder at the thought of what those other teachers might be like.

"Some of them are worse." Prof. Xavier informed him, all nonchalance. "But so long as the children, including your nephew, are fine, neither of us should have reason to cause trouble with the other."

"Yeah." Tony's fingers tapped away at the desk. "No trouble."

o.o.o.o.o

**May 12, 2012**  
**4:05 PM** **  
** **Helicarrier**

"Excuse me." The voice wasn't incredibly deep, but it was clearly male and definitely on its way to some level of maturity. It was also coming from right at the end of the table that was currently occupied by various high-level SHIELD agents and operatives, and their… associates.

Tony's face lit up, and he spun around with his arms thrown wide. "Sasuke! Give Uncle Tony a hug!"

Sasuke blinked once. Twice. "No."

"Manly hug?"

"No."

"Handshake."

"…Fine." Sasuke held out his hand, and allowed Tony to grab it and pull him into a one-armed hug anyway. He didn't seem surprised by the move at all. The tall, orange-haired boy in what seemed to be a curtain silently stepped up behind him.

Tony turned to look at the rest of the table. "For those of you who haven't been properly introduced, this is my brat, Sasuke."

Sasuke closed his eyes, took a deep, fortifying breath (as many needed to do around one such as Tony Stark), and then opened his eyes and nodded around the table to the people he hadn't really met as himself yet. "Hi."

"Rude." Tony jabbed an elbow into Sasuke's side, completely ignoring the hypocrisy of his statement.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Pleasure to meet you. I'm Sasuke Uchiha. This is Juugo. Sorry for getting blood all over your floor."

Natasha held a hand up to her face, hiding a small smile, one of the few she'd had since the news about Clint had come to her over the phone in a the middle of a run-down apartment building in the middle of Russia.

"Already cleaned up." Fury said, the words low and slow and slightly growly. He gestured to Tony's chair, as well at the empty chairs that had been left next to Natasha, most of the room too scared of her to dare sitting there. "So, you two going to sit down, or are we going to have to wait even longer for explanations?"

"Explanations?"

"I'm explaining you and all our adventures since we've met, including how you met the others and what the _hell_ you were doing to get yourself injured like that." Tony's face dropped into a scowl during the second half of the sentence, and Sasuke seemed a tiny bit taken aback by it.

"I'm too old for you to gr—"

"As soon as your business for Konoha is done, I'm dragging you back to the US and grounding you."

"…Fine." Sasuke sat down next to Natasha, Juugo opting to stand behind him instead of taking the other seat. "Where are you in the story?"

"Our first visit to Xavier's."

"It is probably best to mention as little of that as possible, Uncle."

"Other than Thor and your friend here, and you've told me he can't speak English yet, is there even anyone at the table that doesn't already know? And I'm guessing that Thor is cleared on the basis of SHIELD being involved."

"…True enough. But the details—"

"—can be skipped over, kid. We're on a bit of a time limit."

o.o.o.o.o

**January 10, 2004  
10:53 AM  
Westchester**

"Why do we need to visit this school?" Sasuke asked from the backseat; he'd wanted shotgun, but Tony had given that a no; the front was a dangerous place for a kid in case of a crash, not that Tony _would_ crash, but… well, Sasuke's safety came first.

"Because we've been talking over some things regarding genetics, and I want to talk to the Professor in person and look over his notes with him." Tony explained, fingers tapping against the wheel. The school was supposed to be a large, old-fashioned building, that _should_ be the next building in sight, but Tony had been driving without any such buildings in sight for the past few miles.

"And I have to come?"

"Yeah, we're interested in whether or not X-genes and the, uh… _kekkei genkai_ have anything to do with each other."

Sasuke made a face, one that Tony saw in the rearview mirror. "What's wrong, kiddo?"

" _Do I have to give blood?"_ Sasuke still had a habit of switching back to Japanese whenever the words or turns of phrase escaped him in English.

"Not if you don't want to. You don't have to give anything if you don't want to, but we could use something to analyze if you're willing. Blood would let us see stuff like hormone levels and other stuff, but even then, you're a single, underage kid. We'd need a lot more people to get any comprehensive data. Nah, all we'd really take is a cheek swab for DNA so that we can see if there's anything resembling an X gene in your DNA, and even that's up to you." Tony explained as well as he could, fully aware of how much Sasuke hated it when people talked down to him or acted like he was too young to understand them.

"Cheek swab?"

"Uh… take a Q-tip, swipe it along the inside of your cheek to collect a few cells, and that's about it." Tony shrugged, squinting down the road. "I think I see the school now."

"That is all? Just some… stuff from my mouth?" Sasuke seemed surprised.

"Yep, uh, that's about all it would take for us to see what's so funky about your DNA." Tony turned into the drive, relaxing. "We're here. Don't unbuckle 'til I've parked, okay?"

"I know, Uncle." Sasuke rolled his eyes in the rearview mirror, and Tony grinned as he parked.

"Alright, kid, let's get going." Tony pulled himself out of the car and held the door open for Sasuke, hiding a smirk at the way the little kid had to bounce over the seats to get close enough to the door to actually hop out.

"You said this is a school. Where are the students?" Sasuke asked as they walked up to the front doors, the grounds eerily silent.

"Saturday in early January. Most of the kids are probably still home on vacation and not coming back until tomorrow or Monday." Tony knocked on the door. "But there are a few permanent residents, which apparently includes a couple of the students for some reason, so there's probably someone your own age here for you to hang out with when the grown-ups get all boring.

Sasuke made a face, but didn't reply, as the door opened at that very moment.

"Dr. Frost! Good to see you in person again." Tony shook her hand, mind scrambling to come up with a suitably Stark-esque joke, but figured he could put off the insulting humor for later. "So, do I finally get to see what's so special about this place?"

"Indeed, you do." Dr. Frost nodded at him, and then leaned over a little to shake Sasuke's hand. " _It's good to see you again as well, Sasuke._ "

"… _You too, Dr. Frost."_ Sasuke said after Tony nudged him with one foot.

"If you'll both follow me, then?" Dr. Frost turned around and strode off, beckoning for them to follow her in turn.

"So," Tony began as he fell into step beside her, "Why are you the one answering the door? Don't you have TAs or whatever the school equivalent of an intern is to do that for you?"

"We don't have a tendency to take on more staff than necessary, for reasons that will soon be clear to you. We also figured that it would be easier for you if the person to meet you at the doors was someone you already knew." Dr. Frost lead them up a flight of stairs, not slowing down at all. Tony appreciated that, and Sasuke didn't complain, at least.

(Down the hall, he spied a pair of old-fashioned elevator doors, but didn't bring them up. If Dr. Frost preferred the stairs, he didn't really have any reason to complain.)

"Hopefully." Tony muttered. "You've all been dancing around the subject for a while."

Dr. Frost smiled, stopping by a door. "For good reason, Mr. Stark."

She knocked on the door.

"Come in."

Dr. Frost's smile only grew, as did Tony's apprehension. She opened the door and gestured inside. "After you, Mr. Stark."

Tentatively, hand ready to go for his 'protective measures' if necessary, Tony stepped in.

The first person he saw, he recognized. Bald and wheelchair-bound, Prof. Charles Xavier was someone he'd video-chatted with enough over the past few months to recognize.

The second person he saw, he didn't recognize. Short, muscly, and with a set of impressive sideburns, the man was scowling at Tony from the outset.

The third person he saw, he somewhat recognized. Middle-aged, redheaded, and still gorgeous, Jean Grey was someone that Tony had been accustomed to seeing at 'special functions' when he was younger, though they'd gradually entered different circles as they'd entered adulthood themselves.

The fourth person he saw, he most definitely did not recognize. This person likely would have been the first person he'd seen, had they been in his line of site upon entering, but had been hidden behind the door until Tony had taken a few steps in.

This person was very large, very furry, and very blue.

Tony took three very long seconds to stare, eyebrows slowly rising, and then stopped, telling himself that continuing to do so would be rude in ways that he wasn't.

(Tony was _rude_ , but generally only in a 'general asshole' way, to anyone and everyone, with particular attention to people that he didn't like. There were things that were out of line even for him.)

Tony turned back to Prof. Xavier, who was smiling genially in his direction.

"So, I'm going to go ahead and say that my 'the school is at least partly populated by mutants' hypothesis was the right one."


	13. The Students

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sasuke meets a handful of _interesting_ teens and children.

**January 10, 2004**  
**11:34 AM**  
**Westchester**

Sasuke had done the cheek swab thing after some introductions and a short lecture on why he should or shouldn’t agree to it (he agreed), and then Dr. Frost had ( _telepathically_ ) called for one of the slightly older students to come and show him where the permanent child residents were playing so he could hang out with them for a bit. Sasuke would have complained a bit, had his understanding of their conversation extended any further than every fifth word. As it was, he didn’t really understand what was being said, let alone the implications (he was eight, after all), and agreed to go see the other kids as a result.

Ororo looked _a lot_ like the Kaminari no Kuni residents Sasuke knew about. Unlike when he first came to the US, Sasuke now knew what racial diversity meant to the rest of the world, and how it worked (not that it explained anything about racial diversity on the Hidden Continent, but Tony said nothing made sense at home, so Sasuke didn’t bother worrying). But Ororo had both naturally pale hair _and_ really dark skin, which wasn’t common outside Kaminari no Kuni at _all,_ and Sasuke had to keep reminding himself not to ask her about it, because it might be a thing that had to do with her being a mutant or whatever, and asking people about that sort of thing was apparently rude.

(Tony hadn’t been completely clear on why, but he had told Sasuke to be careful about it.)

“So, Sasuke, right? How old are you?”

“Eight.”

“Huh, okay. I’m fifteen, if you wanted to know. If you’re eight, then… well, Anna Marie and Kurt are about your age. Anna Marie’s eight, and Kurt’s only a year older than her, so you shouldn’t have too much trouble on that front.” Ororo thought it over for a few seconds. “Mm… don’t touch any of Anna Marie’s exposed skin, okay? And don’t stare at Kurt. Those are the only special rules for them.”

“…Exposed skin?” Sasuke asked, having no idea what the first word meant.

“Just don’t touch her skin. She wears gloves and long clothes, so it shouldn’t be a big problem, but just so you know.”

“Why not?”

“Because you might die.” Ororo said lightly, smiling down at him. “Some mutant powers have some unfortunate side-effects. Anna Marie can’t control hers well enough yet. That’s part of why she’s here. That’s part of why _any_ of us come here.”

“Because you hurt people?”

“Not on purpose, but yes, part of it is because we sometimes hurt people. Mutant powers are almost always dangerous somehow. Sometimes the danger is to other people. Usually, though, the danger is to us. People see a mutant, they get scared, they get angry, they get dangerous. Most of the kids here are here to avoid getting hurt in the outside world, to learn to control their powers, or both.” Ororo still faced forward, but kept Sasuke in her peripherals, enough that she evidently caught sight of his expression. “What’s wrong?”

“That sounds a lot like what happened to the kekkei genkai clans in Mizu no Kuni.” Sasuke said, biting his lip.

“The what clans in the what-now?”

“Kekkei genkai is, ah… bloodline limits, I think? Mizu no Kuni is Country of Water.” Sasuke kept rolling with the first bit; he knew this sort of thing. “Kekkei Genkai are why Uncle Tony is here, ‘cause he thinks they might have something to do with mutant powers.”

“Uh-huh. And how do they work?” Ororo checked inside one of the rooms. Empty again; worse still, the windows were heavily curtained. She quickly closed the door

“Kekkei Genkai? Um… every ninja can use chakra to do things that civilians can’t, but there are special things that only certain families can do. Some of that stuff is just because they pass down secrets, but some of it is impossible without being part of that family. Like… like doujutsu. Eye techniques.” Sasuke didn’t want to talk about the Sharingan, but it wasn’t like there were many secrets about Konoha’s _other_ major doujutsu, not anywhere that knew about ninjas, anyway. “There’s a clan back home, the Hyuuga. Their eyes are completely white, but if they push chakra in their eyes, they can see through things, and… and other things. I don’t really know the other things. I think they might be able to see how chakra moves inside people’s bodies, though.”

“That’s… interesting.” Ororo probably thought it was weird too, Sasuke guessed, just like Uncle Tony and the rest of the adults. “And what does this have to do with this Country of Water?”

“There were some kekkei genkai clans that people were scared of, because they were very dangerous in the war. The civilians eventually got angry and blamed them for all the bad stuff that happened, and there were a few clans where everybody was killed because of that.” Sasuke hadn’t ever _met_ anybody that had lived through this sort of thing, but he’d asked in school about other clans that might have gone through that sort of thing, because of what had happened to his family.

The library had told him everything that Iruka-sensei wouldn’t.

(The Yuki. The Kaguya. The Hozuki. Obliterated, all. No known survivors for any of them.)

“That’s… pretty similar, yeah. That why you’re here with your uncle? You got one of these powers?”

“Yeah. It does not work yet. It is called Sharingan.” Sasuke shrugged, trying to pretend it didn’t mean anything to him. “I can do other things, though. Other things that need chakra, that any ninja can do if they try to learn.”

“Yeah? Like what?” Ororo stood in the middle of the foyer, hands on her hips, glad that Sasuke hadn’t gotten bored and started complaining yet. Seriously, where were those kids?

“I can breathe fire.” Sasuke said, quickly drawing Ororo’s attention because _what._ “And I can look like other people, but that is just illusion, and I can only do it for a short time.”

“You’re saying any ninja can do this?” Ororo asked, doing her best not to turn it into a demand. If there was an entire _continent_ of people that could do that sort of thing...

“Most ninjas can do henge. Only people with chakra that is already like fire can do Katon jutsu.” Sasuke did not know how to say ‘technique’ or ‘transformation’ or ‘nature.’

“That’s kind of scary, kid.” And it really was.

“Not a lot of people leave.” Sasuke said, seemingly figuring out why Ororo was saying that. “Everybody’s too busy fighting each other to fight people from the outside.”

“Fair enough.” Ororo finally gave up. “Okay, let’s try outside.”

Once outside (Sasuke didn’t volunteer any more information, and Ororo didn’t bother to ask), Ororo cupped her hands around her mouth and yelled. “ _Kurt! Anna Marie! Get over here!”_

The pitter-patter of feet on cement could be heard, and around the corner popped three kids. One was visibly a few years older than Sasuke, and was wearing a pair of sunglasses and a dungy brown leather jacket. The two kids that followed him were closer to Sasuke’s age. The girl in the green dress had brown hair with weird white bangs, and long sleeves and gloves (Sasuke guessed this was Anna Marie, based on what Ororo had said). The one that drew his attention quickest, however, was the boy in the yellow shirt, who was covered in blue fur and had eyes that were a bright, bright yellow.

“Ah, petite prêtresse, I thought I heard your dulcet tones.” The boy in the brown jacket said, grinning. “A new student, then?”

“No, he’s just visiting. Stark’s kid, remember? We both signed the papers. I didn’t know you were taking care of these two.”

“You know the rules. They wanted to go outside, but knew the professor would get mad if they didn’t have an older student or a teacher there with them. I didn’t mind, so we’ve been playing in the snow for the past few minutes.”

“Still, I rather wish someone had told me where you’d gone. I spent too much time looking for you guys.” Ororo gestured at the three permanent residents to come closer. “Sasuke, these are three of the students here at Xavier’s. The one in the jacket is Remy LeBeau; he’s a few years older than you—”

“Twelve, specifically.” The boy in question interrupted, easy grin never leaving his face.

“—so I don’t think you want to bother with him. The other two… kids, introduce yourselves.”

The girl waved at Sasuke. “I’m Anna Marie. This is my brother Kurt.”

A blue tail flicked into view, and then just as quickly out of sight. Sasuke tried not to glance at it.

“Sasuke.” Last names weren’t important here.

“You a mutant?” Anna Marie asked, head tilted.

“I am a ninja.” Americans knew that word much more than ‘shinobi.’

“So you do the sneaky stuff?”

“Not yet. But I can fight, and throw kunai and shuriken, and I can do some ninjutsu.”

“What’s that?” Anna Marie seemed to be the mouthpiece for the siblings, while Kurt hung around behind her, watching Sasuke with careful eyes. Ororo and Remy had drifted off, having a discussion about a class the two shared, but staying within sight.

“Um… things that use chakra. Like… like an illusion that makes me look like someone else, or breathing fire.” Sasuke stuck his hands in his pockets. It was warm for January, but it was still a little chilly. Still, he had gloves and a thick coat; it was (mostly) enough.

“Really?” Anna Marie asked, eyes widening. She glanced at her brother, and then turned back to Sasuke, eyes narrowing. “You sure you ain’t a mutant?”

Sasuke blinked once. Twice. “What is… ‘ain’t’?”

“It is a way of saying ‘isn’t’ or ‘aren’t’ or ‘am not’ that is used in certain American dialects.” Kurt said, his accent standing out even to Sasuke, who hadn’t been living with Tony all that long. Then again, the other three students all had accents of their own (not that Sasuke could tell what they were, yet), so this wasn’t a particularly odd development.

“Ah. I… no, I am not. Any ninja back home can learn ninjutsu if they bother to try.”

“That’s weird,” Anna Marie declared after a second. “But it’s kind of cool. Can you show us?”

“Ano…” Sasuke’s brain shorted out. He wasn’t allowed to use Katon at Tony’s place, due to the risk of drawing attention (and setting something on fire). It was colder here, though, and he was pretty sure he’d seen enough open spaces that a technique aimed at the sky wouldn’t be too much of a risk. Still, he didn’t want to risk annoying the people here. “I can show you henge?”

“’Kay.” Anna Marie nodded, and promptly sat down on the thankfully dry ground. Kurt did the same after a second, sitting behind her like a particularly odd shadow, like the independent one in that movie Tony had showed him, _Peter Pan_.

There were only three handsigns, but Sasuke was still pretty new to this technique, so he had to focus, and choose someone to imitate. After a few seconds, he decided on a dead cousin (of course he was dead; they _all_ were, except Uncle Tony). Shisui had been nice, and had always given Sasuke little chocolates and such when they’d seen each other. “Henge no Jutsu!”

The image stayed in the air, more or less opaque for about three seconds, and then fell apart. Dutifully, Anna Marie and Kurt clapped from their places on the ground, loud and fast. From the other side of the courtyard, Ororo and Remy did the same; they’d apparently been watching as well.

“Now the fire!” Anna Marie ordered, hands pressing down on the ground beside her.

“I would suggest the basketball court for that.” Ororo called. “And maybe wait a while so that we can ask one of the teachers to be on hand in case something goes wrong?”

“I can make it go up instead of into the grass!” Sasuke argued. Even though he’d been planning on suggesting something very similar, the fact that someone older was now the one suggesting it made the suggestion almost immediately distasteful. “And I can make it small or big, if I need to!”

“That’s great, but it’s still _fire._ ” Ororo reminded him. “You might have awesome control, but you’re still a little kid, and as much as I may seem like one to some of you kids, I’m still not an adult, and all the adults are busy right now. And no, Anna Marie, not even if I can make it rain so that the fire goes away. So no fire until later. How about you explore the school instead. Show him the library?”

“I don’t want to go to the library right now. Kitty’s not here, so… oh! We can go see David!” Anna Marie suggested, eyes lighting up. Kurt brightened next to her and nodded along vigorously “Can we go see David? Please? We’ll wear the neat-o helmets and everything, honest!”

Ororo bit her lip, visibly resisted the urge to glance at Remy (the only person even near her age there), and sighed. “Fine. But you have to wear the helmets, okay?”

“Uh-huh. C’mon, Sasuke. I’ll show you where it is.” Anna Marie scrambled to her feet and ran off. Sasuke was thankful she hadn’t grabbed his arm the way the girls back home in Konoha would have, though he realized, after a few seconds, that it was probably because she didn’t like touching people because of the whole death thing.

“David’s room is over here.” Anna Marie lead them inside and over to a sturdy door with a keypad next to the handle. “There’s another door inside. The neat-o helmets are really important, so there’s two doors to make sure people don’t steal ‘em, but we can’t see David without ‘em, because his mutant powers came in too early.”

“What do you mean?” Sasuke watched as Anna Marie typed in a code and pulled the door open with Kurt’s help. There was a small room beyond it, seemingly empty save for the door at the other end, and a keypad set into the metal wall.

“David can read minds, anyone in the room, like the ‘fessor, but he does something like me, where he sees _everything_ a person’s ever known, and gets all their skills, and everything they know. But he’s too little for all that to fit in his head, like I am, and he can’t make it stop just by wearing clothes and gloves, so we gotta wear neat-o helmets when we’re in the room with him, and he’s gotta wear a special inside-out neat-o helmet when he goes out.” She closed the door on herself, Kurt, Sasuke, and Ororo; Remy waved goodbye and left to go to the library, whistling all the way. As soon as the door closed, several compartments in the walls opened up and revealed the helmets they’d been talking about. Anna Marie handed one of the funny-looking helmets over to Sasuke, and he carefully put it on. “Ororo, I forgot; why do we call ‘em neat-o helmets?”

“Because the first person to wear a helmet like this was the Professor’s old friend, who went by the name ‘Magneto’ at one point.” Ororo explained, slipping on one of the helmets as well. “Remember, we can’t leave the room until we put these back where they came from, alright?”

“I _know_ , Ororo.” Anna Marie rolled her eyes.

“Sasuke doesn’t.”

“Yeah, yeah, okay.” Anna Marie pressed a button on the second door, bouncing on her toes as the door opened. “Hey David!”

David, Sasuke observed, was _small_. His skin was brown, like Ororo and Rhodey and people from Kaminari no Kui ( _‘You_ can _just say that a person is black, or African American, you know_ ,’ Tony had told him, but it hadn’t really sunk in). He was small, maybe five years old, and had very short hair. His room was darker than Sasuke had expected, and there were no windows, which probably meant that the walls were lined with something like the neat-o helmets. There was a computer in one corner, and judging by the wearing on the space bar ( _Shinobi must pay attention to everything around them, no matter how small the detail, even in a non-hostile situation_ , Iruka had lectured), it saw a lot of use, as did the worn books on the shelves.

“Hello, Anna Marie, Kurt, Ororo. Who is this?”

David’s eyes were also scarily intelligent, and looked like they belonged on someone much older.

“Hey, David! This is Sasuke. He’s here ‘cause his uncle wants to talk to the grown-ups about X-gene stuff and ninjas.” Anna Marie threw herself onto the bed, kicking her legs back and forth. Kurt sat down on the floor next to her. “He’s just gonna be here for a couple hours, and I didn’t want to go to the library, so we decided to come here.”

David nodded, and his eyes slid over to Sasuke. He pursed his lips. “I think I can… Konnichiwa, Sasuke-san. Ogenki desu ka?”

Sasuke blinked, surprised, but then calmed down. It was probably just part of the power, right? David had met someone that knew Japanese, and now he knew it too. Right. That made sense. “Daijoubu.”

“Guys, don’t do that, please?” Anna Marie pouted. “C’mon, it’s not like Kurt and I talk in German to confuse _you_.”

“That is because I know German as well.” David countered.

“They don’t do it to me, either, and I don’t speak German.” Ororo pointed out.

“But you do it to make yourself feel better sometimes, right?” David pressed, leaning forward where he was seated in the computer chair. Ororo had taken up a position by the door, while Sasuke had chosen to take a seat on the floor by the bookcase. “Or because English is too difficult?”

“I do, yes.” Kurt answered with a nod, voice soft again. It was funny, because Sasuke was pretty sure that Kurt spoke English better than Anna Marie did.

“Yeah, but we do it when we’re alone and it ain’t botherin’ nobody.” Anna Marie continued to protest.

“Maybe.” David allowed, and then swung from one side to the other in his swivel chair. “You’re here, now. What do you want to do?”

“Uh…” Anna Marie apparently hadn’t thought that far ahead. “You got Battleship, right?”

“I do.”

And the rest of the afternoon was wasted away on playing board games with a boy that Sasuke was pretty sure was ten times smarter than even _Itachi_.


	14. The Disguise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time flies when you're hiding from the world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As of this chapter, this story includes some elements of the X-Men movies, namely Mystique and Professor X's sibling relationship. However, there is much more divergence from canon compared to the MCU and Naruto, as exemplified by Emma Frost's earlier presence.

**January 10, 2004**  
**5:23 PM**  
**Westchester**

“So,” Tony said after they’d pulled out of the school’s drive and started heading out. “I’m guessing you had fun?”

Sasuke kicked his legs back and forth for a bit, staring out the window. “Yes, Uncle.”

“You can give me details, you know.” Tony glanced away from the road just barely long enough to poke Sasuke in the shoulder. “And you can’t talk about it once we get back home, because Pep and Ms. Douglas and JARVIS are there. So if you want to tell me anything, now’s the time to do it.”

Sasuke made a face. “Um… I showed them Henge and my Goukakyuu.”

“That’s the big fireball, right?” Tony knew it was, of course, but he tried to be involved with Sasuke’s non-traditional schooling, to make it obvious that he was paying attention. He remembered what Howard had been like growing up; he didn’t want to be that kind of parent.

“Mm-hm.” Sasuke nodded. “But we had to wait for when Mr. Howlett came outside while you and the other adults were talking. Ororo said we could not do anything that dangerous unless there was an adult there.”

“Smart girl.” Tony commented. “What about the other kids? You get along with them pretty well?”

“I think so.” Sasuke frowned a little, as though going over the day’s events and trying to decide for himself.

“Well, tell me about them, then. Were they nice? Were you nice? What did you talk about?” Tony tried to draw an answer out, though he felt like he might have been a bit too pushy.

“I… Ororo is nice, and so is Remy, but they are both a few years older than me.” Sasuke bit his lip and turned to look out the window. “Ann Marie talks a lot, but her brother doesn’t. And David is… smart. Very smart. He knows Japanese, and other languages. Remy left, but the rest of us played games in David’s room. He has a game that I like. I think it is called… Battleship?”

“I think we can pick that up on the way home, if you want.” Tony offered. “Or JARVIS can pull up a digital version.”

“Mm.” Sasuke kept staring out the window. “Kurt is blue. And, ah, he has fur?”

“Seems to be a common enough mutation, since Hank’s the same way.” Tony shrugged. “Is there anyone in Konoha that’s blue?”

“No.” Sasuke shook his head. “But there might be in other villages. I think I saw a picture in a Bingo book one time. It was on my father’s desk.”

“The world gets a little stranger every day.” Tony commented, pulling onto the main highway. “But, just to be sure, you did like it there? You wouldn’t mind going back once in a while?”

Sasuke looked at Tony for a second. “Yes. I would like that.”

“Good. You need friends on this side of the Pacific.” Tony grinned over at Sasuke. “Gotta have someone, right?”

“I already know you and Pepper and Ms. Douglas and Obadiah and Rhodey and Dr. Frost.” Sasuke pointed out, primarily out of a desire to argue.

“And none of us are the same age as you, and I _know_ you aren’t close to anyone except Ms. Douglas back in Konoha.” Tony sighed, and switched to Japanese. “ _Listen, kiddo, I just want to make sure you’re okay. I didn’t have any friends my own age when I was a kid, and I know how bad that can hurt. I’m just glad to see that you’ve got friends, okay?”_

Sasuke frowned and looked out the window, refusing to answer, but there was something warm in his chest again.

He didn’t entirely hate that feeling.

o.o.o.o.o

**July 23, 2003  
France**

Sasuke’s ninth birthday was spent in Paris and the surrounding countryside, sightseeing.

o.o.o.o.o

**September 14, 2004**  
**8:52 AM**  
**Stark Industries, Queens, New York**

“Okay.” Tony closed his eyes and took a deep breath. “Okay, this is happening.”

“Uncle?” Sasuke tilted his head. He was sitting at the counter, watching his uncle pace around the room and mutter to himself in worry. “Why are you…?”

Tony made a face, guessing the end of the sentence. “Worried?”

“Yes.”

Tony’s expression didn’t change. “Listen, kiddo, I’ve been doing my best to make sure no one knows you exist for a year and a half now. And you’ve proven that you can keep that illusion thing up without any trouble for a couple hours, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t something that could go horribly, awfully wrong at some point and destroy all that work to keep you out of the public eye.”

“I’m good at Henge.” Sasuke protested, though only half-heartedly. “You do not need to worry so much.”

“Just because you’re good at it doesn’t mean you’re going to have zero trouble with it if a situation pops up.” Tony told him, if only because it felt necessary to have the words said out loud. “If you’re put into a dangerous situation, you might lose hold of it, and then I’ll have to deal with people knowing about you _and_ questions about why you have powers like that.”

“And they will think that I am a mutant and might try to have me taken and ex… exa… tested?” Sasuke hedged, stumbling on the last words.

“Examined, and possibly, though I doubt it. I’m too big of a name in most political circles for them to risk that. But I grew up in the spotlight and it’s… not healthy. Not safe. Not for a kid like you.” Tony rubbed a hand down his face. “I don’t need the media’s spotlight on you, for multiple reasons, and most of them are to keep you happy and safe, okay?”

“I _know_ , Uncle.” Sasuke like the fact that his uncle cared, but he could be a bit… overbearing, even if it wasn’t as often as Sasuke’s parents had been, sometimes. “But I can do this.”

“Yeah, yeah you can.” Tony put a hand to the back of his head, scratching lightly. “I just… I can’t come with you, because then people might notice, so I’m just…”

“You can trust Ms. Douglas.” Sasuke frowned, kicking his feet a little. “She’s taken care of me so far.”

“She can’t save you from everything.” Tony muttered, once more pacing around. “You’re sure you can do this?”

“ _Yes_ , Uncle.” Sasuke rolled his eyes when Tony’s back was turned. “Even Iruka-sensei told me that I was good enough for this when I asked him.”

“Okay,” Tony stopped pacing and put his face into his hands, breathing out slowly. “Okay okay okay okay okay.”

There was a knock from the entrance to the kitchen. “Sasuke?”

“Ms. Douglas!” Sasuke hopped down from his chair and ran over to her, skidding to a stop a few steps away. She smiled down at him. “I am ready, but Uncle is worried.”

“Of course I’m worried.” Tony muttered. “Okay, you guys are just going to Madison Square Park and I’ll do my thing and go to the Shake Shack and we’ll all have excuses to be there and I’ll wear sunglasses so that people can’t tell I’m watching and this will all be fine.”

Sasuke exchanged a glance with Ms. Douglas. She smiled softly and shook her head. “Yes, Mr. Stark. Ms. Potts will be with you, correct?”

“Yeah. We’ll be talking business so that people don’t bother us.” Tony rubbed his hands together and huffed out a breath. “Right, this is happening.”

“Yes, Uncle, it is.”

o.o.o.o.o

**September 14, 2004**  
**10:34 AM**  
**Madison Square Park, Manhattan, New York**

“Calm down.” Pepper muttered under her breath, pen scratching over the surface of the paper on her clipboard.

“I am calm.” Tony mumbled around a mouthful of burger, followed up immediately by a slurp of the smoothie he’d also gotten. Neither one was anything amazing, but they were decent and also fairly famous, so he had an excuse.

Also, he just really liked burgers.

“Your leg is shaking.” Pepper pointed out, gesturing just barely with a nod of her head.

Tony swallowed and looked down, his sunglasses obscuring the glance, and noted that yes, his leg was indeed bouncing up and down at a rather rapid pace. He forced it to stop.

“Right.”

Pepper looked up at him again, this time with a quirked brow. She leaned over and whispered as quietly as possible, with as little movement of her lips as she could manage. “He’s right over there, right in your line of sight, and Happy’s keeping people far enough away that they can’t see what you’re looking at. You can sneak glances once in a while, Mr. Stark. That’s why you’re here.”

Tony leaned back in his chair, slouching and resting his laced hands on his stomach, and ‘casually’ looked over at where he knew Sasuke and Ms. Douglas were.

Ms. Douglas looked the same as ever, proper and young and olive-skinned, clean and unblemished. Overall, slightly intimidating for some unspoken, unknown reason, but respectable and business-like.

She almost distracted people from the man beside her.

Clearly an Uchiha, with curly hair and winged eyeliner, Sasuke’s Henge was recognizable as the figure of an older cousin he had pictures of in the family album he’d spent the past few years putting together. Shisui, if Tony wasn’t mistaken. A pretty young man, but given that Sasuke had altered the Henge to wear more typical New Yorker clothing rather than a shinobi outfit, he’d somehow managed to make the Henge even prettier. He was attracting the attentions of a few younger women that weren’t more distracted by Tony.

He also looked a bit uncomfortable, but he was more interested in drinking his shake and talking to Ms. Douglas than paying attention to the girls. Tony couldn’t quite relate, but he could understand, mostly. Besides, Sasuke was nine. Whether he eventually became interested in women or not, he was still very young.

“Are they having fun?” Pepper asked quietly, not looking up from her papers.

“Yeah. Yeah, I think they are.”

This could work.

o.o.o.o.o

**January 16, 2005**  
**11:36 AM**  
**Malibu, Tony’s basement laboratory**

“—and that’s how you finish it off, okay?”

“I can do this, Uncle.” Sasuke pushed his way to the table, slightly annoyed by the fact that Tony didn’t seem to think he could do this.

“I know, brat,” Tony ruffled Sasuke’s hair, probably because he’d spent the day with Ms. Douglas in his Shisui henge instead of at home, and Tony had a habit of ruffling his hair when he did that. Or maybe he was just doing it to be annoying. “But you’re not used to this after all your time in Konoha.”

“Ah, yes,” Sasuke switched to Japanese, “ _I will be the genin best suited to fixing the telephone wires.”_

 _“Okay, your city has a dangerous amount of unprotected wiring just lying around.”_ Tony wagged a finger at him and walked around the table. “ _Seriously, it’s just dangerous, especially with all the ninjas jumping all over the place._ ”

Sasuke rolled his eyes, and then sat down on the bench and looked at the components before him. He glanced over at what Tony had made.

“You can do it; it’s just a toaster.”

Sasuke shot Tony a glare, not softening at the cheery grin that he got in return. “ _You’re not helping_.”

“ _C’mon, I’ve been teaching you how to do the sciencey stuff for almost two years. I know you know how to do this.”_

Sasuke moved his glare back to the pieces before him and took a deep breath. He could do this. Right.

He began pulling parts together, wires and heating components and structural parts. He’d just seen Tony do it and he knew how each part worked individually, so it was just a matter of some memorization paired with logic.

“ _I bet David could do it.”_ Tony teased, batting away the small screw that Sasuke tossed at him. “ _Now, now, no throwing things_.”

“ _I’m not David’s kind of genius._ ” Sasuke said, fingers deftly twisting a wire. “ _He is in a caliber of his own_.”

“ _His genius is partly mutant power; of course he is.”_ Tony sat down on one of the lab chairs and swiveled in place. “ _In a decade, even I wouldn’t be insulted by someone telling me he’s smarter than I am, and I’m one of the smartest people on the planet and almost thirty years his senior._ ”

“ _Very humble._ ” Sasuke muttered, most of his attention on the pieces in his hands. He wasn’t entirely sure which one to use where at the moment, but if he placed them _just so_ , it wouldn’t matter. Probably. He’d solder it down anyway to make sure it didn’t rattle about.

“ _I have every cause to be.”_ Tony declared, picking up a pen. After a few seconds, he began to spin it through his fingers, the sound of it loud in the quiet air of the lab.

“ _Right_.” Sasuke snorted, and finished screwing in what he thought was the last piece. After a few seconds, he nodded and pushed it towards Tony. Switching back to English, he asked, “How did I do?”

“Well, I watched you make it, so I know where you went wrong and right, but…” Tony reached under the table and pulled out a plate of bread. “How about we test it out?

Sasuke was tempted to bite his lip in anticipation, but tamped down the impulse and watched impassively instead. Nothing seemed to go wrong when Tony pressed the lever down, and there weren’t any sparks or the smell of burning.

DING!

Out popped two slices of bread, very lightly browned; they weren’t quite toast, but they were certainly on their way.

“So?” Sasuke leaned forward onto the table and kicked his legs back and forth. Tony took a bite of the bread and seemed to think it over.

“…Tasty.” Tony declared.

“Uncle!” Sasuke didn’t pout. Of course not.

“Alright, alright!” Tony laughed. “Okay, so you didn’t do things quite the way I showed you. You kind of bungled a few things, _but_ you still got it to work, even if it’s a bit weaker than expected. So there’s room for improvement, but you passed or whatever.”

Sasuke took a minute to translate it all in his head, and then nodded. So he hadn’t done it entirely right, but it was close enough to sort of work.

“ _Okay, so what did I do wrong?_ ” Sasuke asked, all business.

Tony grinned. “ _Come over here and I’ll show you, step by step._ ”

o.o.o.o.o

**July 23, 2005  
Konohagakure no Sato**

Sasuke’s tenth birthday passed mostly without incident, in Konoha. He avoided fangirls and Naruto, but was otherwise alright. Tony brought far too much food and shiny new toys, but he also brought Pepper and Happy and Rhodey and Obadiah, so Sasuke was happy.

o.o.o.o.o

**October 5, 2005**  
**3:34 PM**  
**Madison Square Park**

Sasuke liked going out into the city with Ms. Douglas. The activity was interesting and, unlike going around with his uncle and pretending to be yet another security guard, he could actively pursue interesting things. Museums, parks, tourist attractions, all of them were within his reach when he went out with his caretaker instead of his uncle.

Sasuke did love Tony. He was family and he was good at being family, but he was also very famous and it wasn’t easy to go places with him because of that. With Ms. Douglas, he could move around almost freely.

(Not completely freely, because as old as his henge looked, he was still legally a child and needed supervision and boundaries.)

Sometimes he even got to go out _without_ a disguise on, though that was rarer, and got to go to children’s museums and playgrounds, though that wasn’t always as fun, given that most of the children there were incredibly… well, civilian. And so were their parents.

“Billy Kaplan, you get down from there right now!”

 _Very_ civilian.

“ _Ms. Douglas, I don’t understand why they are so protective._ ” He said as he sat next to her on the bench, sipping on a box of juice. “ _Most of those places aren’t high enough to be dangerous._ ”

“ _You’re a ninja, Sasuke. Your chakra allows you to heal faster than them, and makes you more durable as well._ ” Ms. Douglas reminded him, pulling out a bag of celery sticks and handing them to him. “ _It’s easy to forget, but they are much more breakable than you are._ ”

Sasuke made a face at that, but relaxed. “ _Things would be much easier if they made the ground softer, then_.”

“ _Yes, but that costs money, and people prefer to spend government money on other things._ ” Ms. Douglas mused, “ _Like subway repairs._ ”

Sasuke though it over for a second. “ _Those are probably pretty important_.”

“ _Yes, most people would agree with you.”_ Ms. Douglas laughed. “ _They need those to get to work or school, and would have to use much more expensive transportation methods if those didn’t exist, and many people can’t afford that._ ”

“ _I guess_.” Sasuke kicked his legs back and forth. _“Can we go to the Natural History Museum later?_ ”

“ _I don’t see why not. I’ll tell your uncle and well see what he says._ ”

o.o.o.o.o

**January 25, 2006**  
**8:52 PM**  
**Stark Industries, Queens, New York**

“I see. Yes, we can do that. I’ll work on it myself. You can discuss the contract with Ms. Potts.” Tony hung up and shoved his face into his hands, groaning quietly. His desk was a mess, but… well, when wasn’t it?

“Mr. Stark?” Pepper asked from her own desk. “Is something wrong?”

“You ever get the feeling that the world is turning into a really weird place?” Tony asked, pulling his face up and resting his chin on one palm. “Just… like all the weirdness that was in the Hidden Continent is, like, slowly leeching out?”

“Not really.” Pepper answered slowly. “What brought this on?”

“Just got a call from the Secretary of Defense and… oh hell, Pep, it’s crazy.” Tony shuddered a bit. “This scientist at Culver was working on some project for Thunderbolt Ross, you know, the asshole? It was something about recreating the Supersoldier program from the forties, because _that’s_ worked out so well in the past, and they were playing around with gamma rays on the project, and the feds threatened to cut the funding so one of the scientists working on it decided to test it out on himself and… it changed him Pep. This was _weeks_ ago and they’ve kept it all under wraps somehow. Come look at this.”

Pepper stood slowly and made her way over, stepping delicately around some of the things Tony had lying around on the floor. She was quiet while watching the videos, save for a small gasp here and there, and quiet when it ended.

“So they want me to build something to take this guy down.”

“You don’t want to.” Pepper guessed.

“The man was a brilliant scientist, Pep. I’ve read his papers, the man’s a genius and he only means the best. But right now he’s a massive threat to a lot of people and if he shows up in a populated area like that again, it could mean a lot of deaths.” Tony pinched the bridge of his nose. “And for some reason he’s immune to most physical weaponry so I’ve got to come up with something powerful enough to take him down that _doesn’t_ somehow rely on bullets or explosives or anything like that.”

“You can do that, Tony, easily.”

“But I don’t _want_ to, Pep. A mind like that? It’s… it’s almost a _sin_.”

“You don’t have much of a choice, Tony. Not this time.” Pepper looked at the screen again, at the two pictures side by side, of a kind-looking man with a soft face and rage-filled green monster. “Maybe he’ll stay away from people or keep it under control somehow.”

“Maybe.” Tony sounded doubtful. “But they’ve got Ross on this. Whether Banner tries to be safe for people or not, Ross will hunt him down.”

“I know.”

_But there aren’t many options._

o.o.o.o.o

**March 12, 2006**  
**2:32 PM**  
**Westchester**

“I saw a picture on the Professor’s desk today.” Sasuke said, moving a piece forward on the chess board in front of him. David was sitting on the other side, wearing the reverse neat-o Helmet, while Anna Marie and Kurt were sitting off to the side. “He was with a woman in it. She was blue, like Kurt.”

Kurt nodded. “That is my mother. She and the Professor grew up as brother and sister.”

“You do not call him uncle.” Sasuke noted, watching the board as David moved a piece.

“We just like calling him the Professor better. It sounds more cooler.” Anna Marie crunched down on an apple slice. “We still call him Uncle Charles sometimes, just not when we’re talking to people who don’t know we’re related.”

“You never told me.” Sasuke said, trying not to sound like he was complaining.

“You never asked.” Kurt replied, grinning.

Sasuke stuck his tongue out at Kurt in retaliation, but gave in to his curiosity a few seconds later and went back to asking questions instead of being bratty. “If your mother is blue, and so is Kurt, why is Anna Marie not?”

“I was adopted.” The answer came easily, matter-of-factly even. “Mom found me after some bad stuff happened at my old home, and then left me here when she needed to do other stuff. Uncle Charles found Kurt a year later after some stuff happened at the circus he was living in in Germany.”

Sasuke nodded slowly. “A circus? What is a…?”

 _“A circus is a group of travelling entertainers._ ” David translated, which was more than he’d said for most of the afternoon. “ _There are animal performances, clowns, trapeze artists, acrobats, magicians, and so on._ ”

“I… see.” Sasuke thought he may have heard of such things in Moon country, but not in many other places on the Hidden Continent. He thought he might like to see one. He turned back to Kurt. “You were raised in one?”

“They were good people.” Kurt said, smiling. “But the authorities found out about me and wanted to take me away, and that is when Uncle Charles stepped in.”

“Why did he not before?”

“He saw that the family I had was good, and thought I would be happier there than with a man I barely knew.” Kurt shrugged. “When that changed, he came to find me and brought me here. I still write letters to the people I know in the circus, but I cannot live with them anymore.”

“Oh.” Sasuke looked down at the ground and frowned. “That is… not good.”

“It is what it is.” Kurt shrugged again. “They are alive, and they love me, and we can speak with one another when we want to. It is enough.”

“I just wish Mama would come back.” Anna Marie said, and her voice, normally quite chipper, was suddenly much sadder. “She hasn’t been by since she left me here, and I miss her.”

Sasuke frowned. “Why not? Why does she not come?”

“She does not know that I am alive.” Kurt said. “Uncle Charles says she stays away due to grief and anger, and that he has known her to leave and not communicate for far longer.”

“She was already sad when she found me.” Anna Marie confided. “But she tried not to be, I think, so that I wouldn’t notice, but I did. She left me with Uncle Charles because she didn’t think it was healthy for me to be around her when she was like that.”

“At least, that is what he told us.” Kurt said quietly.

“I’m sure she will come back eventually.” Sasuke said, mostly telling the truth. “And she will be very happy to know that you are alive, right?”

“Right.” Kurt smiled at him, and Sasuke could tell that neither of the siblings really thought Sasuke was any surer than he did, but ending the conversation on a hopeful note was a good idea.

“Checkmate.” David said, drawing Sasuke’s attention back to the board. He shrugged at Sasuke’s indignant look. “You weren’t paying attention to any of your plays.”

“Again.” Sasuke demanded.

o.o.o.o.o

**July 23, 2006  
Tokyo**

Sasuke’s eleventh birthday was spent in Tokyo, seeing one of the largest cities in the world and enjoying the fact that he could speak the local language far more fluently than his uncle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I promised to add a scene about who Ms. Douglas actually is here but I ran out of steam and I hit a decent word count anyway, so… maybe next time.
> 
> Also, please comment! I know it takes time that not everyone has, but I like seeing what you think and it's great motivation.


	15. The Reveal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess which character finally revealed their real identity?
> 
> Hint: she's a nanny.

**September 18, 2006**  
**3:43 AM**  
**Malibu**

Sasuke liked to think he was good under pressure.

He was, sort of, in the sense that he didn’t panic.

He just sort of… lost himself.

There wasn’t any _thinking_ involved when he woke to find a bunch of random goons trying to kidnap him from Tony’s house.

He just moved.

Sasuke hid a kunai under his pillow at all times, since the day he’d been allowed to have weapons again. He didn’t sleep with it clenched in his hand, but it was a close thing.

The first man got stabbed in the shoulder.

The second got a kick to the throat while he was still cursing in surprise at the fact that a kid had just sent his partner screaming.

The third got a kunai to the chest, since he was on the other side of the room. Sasuke’s throwing aim wasn’t good enough to slip it between the ribs, so it caught on bone instead of diving deeper, but that was probably for the best.

By this point, the first man had regained his faculties enough to make another grab for Sasuke, and managed to actually catch hold of an arm.

Sasuke’s leg connected with his face a second later.

The third man had pulled the kunai from his throat, and was now swinging it wildly.

So he got a face full of fire.

After several seconds of being surrounded by nothing but groaning, and not attacks, Sasuke’s mind came back, and he took a look around him.

Blood, and wheezing, and charred flesh, and nothing he’d thought he’d be able to do after what Itachi had—

No. Better to avoid that train of thought.

There were grunts coming from the hallway, and after one last fearful glance around the room (they were alive, but that did little to comfort him), he left.

It was carnage.

It was a different kind than inside Sasuke’s room, of course. There wasn’t any fire here, for one. Less blood, too. There were also more people, and guns.

And most importantly, the one fighting wasn’t Sasuke. It was Ms. Douglas.

Ms. Douglas fought like an artist. She fought like a taijutsu master, one of a specific form that seemed more ballet than fighting style. She was all legs and blank fury, with her arms seemingly reserved solely for supporting her in her violent dance. She avoided the gunshots, few as there were in such a crowded space, disarmed the men and _broke_ them with what would have been cold, calculated efficiency, had it not been for the snarl that graced her face.

She was terrifying.

She was inspiring.

She was… protecting him?

“Sasuke!” Tony came up from behind him, and Sasuke only barely managed to stifle his startle reflex enough to _not_ stab his uncle when he grabbed him around the torso like that.

“ _She’s killing them._ ” Sasuke whispered.

“ _Maybe_.” Tony admitted. “ _But she’s doing her job, and she’s even better at it than I expected her to be. I might need to give her a raise after this, or at least a bonus_.”

“ _She never_ …” Sasuke trailed off. _She’d never shown this side to him._

“ _That’s because before, she didn’t need to, or she did it out of your sight.”_ Tony pulled Sasuke away from the fight as more of the goons started to notice them. “Panic room, now.”

“ _But…!_ ”

This was the moment at which one of the men finally got a lucky shot, and managed to put a bullet through Ms. Douglas’s leg.

She didn’t make a sound, but she didn’t need to for the room to take notice. Not with how the rest of her body reacted.

Sasuke noticed the blood first. It seeped through the thin pants Ms. Douglas wore to bed with ease. The rest of the change spread from there, hidden beneath the draped cloth until it reached bare skin.

Flickering blue scales.

They folded their way across Ms. Douglas’s skin, over her arms and legs and even her face, changing the shape of her body wherever it crossed. Her eyes bled an acidic yellow, and her hair shortened and stuck to her head, turning a glistening red.

Ms. Douglas spared one look for Tony and Sasuke at the end of the hall.

“Go.”

With that one word grunted out, she snapped her good leg out into the gut of a nearby attacker and resumed the fight, losing only a portion of her grace.

“Let’s go, Sasuke.” Tony bustled him out of the room. “She’ll be fine.”

Sasuke wasn’t sure.

(Besides, he found something hauntingly familiar about the woman that may have once been Ms. Douglas.)

o.o.o.o.o

**September 18, 2006**  
**4:18 AM**  
**The Panic Room, Malibu**

“Sir,” JARVIS interrupted the game of jacks that Tony and Sasuke had been playing while waiting for their time in the room to end, “Ms. Douglas is requesting entrance.”

“How do you know it’s her?” Sasuke asked.

“The entrance code used was hers.” JARVIS answered. “Shall I set up a line of communication instead?”

“Yeah,” Tony said, rubbing a hand over his face. “Do that.”

“Stark, let me in.” The screen next to the door began to stream a live video feed of the person outside the door. The voice was Ms. Douglas’s, but the face on the wall was that of the blue woman. She looked annoyed. “The attackers are all incapacitated, and you and I both know the best medical care is in the house is in that room.”

“Police aren’t on their way?” Tony asked, as though testing the waters.

“Like you’d risk Sasuke that way.” The woman snorted. “And like I’d risk letting them take me prisoner after everything. I called Pepper and Obadiah. Let me in, Stark. I’m bleeding here, and I need to get this bullet _out_ before it does more damage than it already has.”

Tony considered it a moment. Sasuke could see him doing it.

“Alright. J, she’s cool. Let ‘er in.”

“At once, Sir.”

The blue woman limped in, and the look on her face was the same long-suffering look that was always on Ms. Douglas’s, but less hidden.

“How kind of you.” She drawled, setting herself down on a chair and pulling out the medical supplies. “This might get a bit gory, so feel free to look away.”

“I’ve seen worse.” Both of them said at once. They glanced at one another (Sasuke with a raised eyebrow, and Tony just reproving) and then back at Ms. Douglas.

“Sure.” She agreed easily, pulling out a pair of long tweezers. “Still, don’t stay on my account.”

“Feel like I better keep an eye on you until you explain things.” Tony said, leaning back in his chair and putting on a relaxed air, but tense as a bowstring.

“I’m a mutant. I did some things I’m not proud of, and I’m trying to make up for it by protecting people. Figure I might as well put my skillset to good use, and playing bodyguard for children seems like a good option.” She yanked the bullet out of her leg with a hiss. “That’ll take a while to heal.”

“No shit,” Tony said, ignoring the dirty look she shot him; Sasuke wasn’t sure if it was due to his insensitivity (as she had on occasion) or due to cursing in front of a kid (as she had with alarming frequency), but he figured it was a mixture of the two. “Quick question: is Rachel even your real name?”

“No. It’s rather close, but no.” She was wrapping the wound, now; it bled less than Sasuke expected it to. “My name, back before I dropped it, was Raven Darkholme.”

That name, much like her face, tugged at something in the back of Sasuke’s mind. He knew it, somehow, but he just couldn’t remember _how_.

“Pretty name for a pretty lady.” Tony remarked, earning himself an eyeroll from both Sasuke and Ms. Dou… Ms. Darkholme. “Any reason why you chose to do high profile body-guarding instead of doing security at a children’s hospital or something?”

Raven stilled for a moment. “I could… see what kinds of assignments I was getting. I tried to make sure I ended up with children that were particularly high-risk. Mutants, mostly.”

“There are mutants in high society?” Tony asked, though he sounded far from incredulous to Sasuke’s ears. Rather, he seemed resigned. “That why the Worthington kid stopped showing up at his dad’s parties a few years ago?”

“…I’m not at liberty to divulge that information.” Raven said, though that was enough to assume that the answer was a ‘yes.’ “But there are more mutants in high society than you think. In all society, really, but the economic extremes seem to collect them more.”

It hit Sasuke with a sudden clarity. “You’re the Professor’s missing sister!”

Raven twisted in her seat, nearly falling off her chair. “How did you hear about that?”

Sasuke thought quickly. “I… Anna Marie told me. After I saw a picture on his desk.”

 _She thinks I’m dead_ , Kurt’s words echoed back to him. No, that wasn’t Sasuke’s information to share. She deserved to hear it from family. From the Professor, or Anna Marie, or Kurt himself.

Something in Raven’s eyes softened. “You’ve been visiting the school, then.”

Sasuke nodded, figuring there was no harm in telling her. “She misses you. So does the Professor.”

“They’re better off without me.” Raven shook her head and went back to tending to her injury. “I’m surprised she hasn’t forgotten me.”

“At least visit.” Sasuke tried to convince her, feeling the weight of Tony’s (weirdly non-interfering) eyes on his back. “I mean, if you really think you’re better off that way, then you don’t have to stay forever, but at least visit.”

Raven stared at him, a calculating look in her eyes. “How would you feel if Itachi came back? Just to visit?”

“That’s different.” Sasuke said immediately. “I don’t _want_ Itachi to come back. I’m terrified of that happening. Anna Marie _misses_ you.”

“People _die_ around me, Sasuke.” Raven told him sharply. “Whether I want them to or not, they do. My husband and son died, and Charles was left crippled, largely due to me. Dozens of mutants and humans, just by known association.”

“That won’t happen. Not just if you visit.” Sasuke tried again, pressing the issue. He’d tell her Kurt was alive if he had to, but he didn’t want to be the one to do that. He didn’t have that right.

“It’s a bad idea.” Raven said again, and her face was clouded. “I shouldn’t have even stayed here with you long enough to tell you this. I should have left the minute I finished up the business in the hall.”

“Five minutes.” Tony interrupted. “Visit for five minutes, just to let them know you’re okay and that you still care.”

 _Just long enough to see Kurt_ , Sasuke’s brain translated. He nodded vigorously.

Raven stared at them suspiciously. “There’s something you’re not telling me.”

“Not really.” Tony shrugged. “I know as much as you do, probably less. But I can tell Sasuke’s just bursting to tell you something that he thinks he can’t say, for whatever reason.”

Sasuke shot his uncle a glare. Now wasn’t really the time.

Raven folded her arms over her chest and stared at Sasuke, just daring him to try to lie to her.

“There is more information.” Sasuke admitted, and then switched languages. “ _But I think you would be best off hearing it from Anna Marie or the Professor, not me_.”

Raven pursed her lips, but seemed satisfied that they weren’t hiding anything more from her.

“Three minutes.” Raven finally said. “Any more than that, I’ll stay of my own volition, but three minutes is the most I can promise.”

“Can I call ahead to tell them you’re coming?” Sasuke asked hopefully.

Raven took a deep breath. “Fine. Just don’t let them make a big production out of it.”

“Great!” Tony clapped his hands, startling both of them. “I’ll call up Happy and tell him to get the jet ready soon. We should be there in about… five hours?”

“We _do_ need to take care of the unconscious men in your hallway.” Raven reminded him. She then winced and rubbed at her shoulder. “And women. At least one of those fighters was a woman that knew what she was doing.”

Tony frowned for a moment, deep in thought. “I… think I know who to call. Give me a few minutes and I might be able to get a clean-up crew down here that can keep secrets. J? Remember Aunt Peggy’s niece? Sharon? Blonde and kinda frigid to me after the thing with the ice cooler?”

“Indeed, Sir. She _is_ our SHIELD contact, after all.”

“Bingo, call her.”

Raven stared at Tony with wide eyes. “SHIELD? You trust SHIELD?”

“I trust ‘em about as far as I can throw them.” Tony answered promptly. “But I know Sharon well enough to know that she can keep this as quiet as possible and get it cleaned up in no time with a crew that won’t talk.”

Raven shook her head. “You’re going to get us all killed.”

“Haven’t yet!” Tony called as he left the room.

Sasuke chewed on his lip for a few seconds, and then pulled his legs up onto his chair and crossed them. “JARVIS? Can you send a text message to the Professor for me? I don’t think they’d let me go get my phone right now.”

“I certainly wouldn’t.” Raven informed him. “Ninja or not, you’re still a child. I can’t say the same for Tony.”

“I can send a text message to Charles Xavier.” JARVIS confirmed. “What would you like it to contain?”

“Um…” Sasuke thought about how he could word it to keep it vague. “Tell him… ‘We found your sister, and we are going to bring her to the school in a few hours because you and Anna Marie miss her. She’s only promised a few minutes, but that should be enough to tell her… the thing.”

He finished lamely, well aware of Raven’s eyes on his back.

“This surprise of yours better be a good one, Sasuke.” Raven told him. “I don’t appreciate people keeping secrets from me.”

“Then you’re a… a…” Sasuke struggled for the word, “A hypocrite.”

“Really now?”

“Yes!” Sasuke turned around to face her again. “And you’re meaner like this, too!”

“Sasuke, it is currently four-thirty in the morning and I have been shot in the leg and talked into doing something I avoid whenever possible. I have every right to be grumpy.”

Sasuke floundered for a second, and then just huffed and turned back around, arms folded. “Whatever.”

o.o.o.o.o

**September 18, 2006**  
**1:15 PM**  
**Westchester, New York**

Sasuke shifted in his seat in the back of the car that was, at least currently, being driven by Raven herself. Tony, conversely, was in the back with Sasuke. Raven usually looked strangely prim in her day-to-day clothing, but she seemed even more severe with her new, stranger coloring. Sasuke’s phone kept going off with texts from Kurt and Anna Marie, asking him if he was _sure_ this was their mom, and that she really was finally going to come visit, and asking just how he’d found her, and so on.

The school came into view, and Sasuke could see, even from this distance, the dark grey and green splotches that were the Professor and Anna Marie. There was also a large blue splotch, much too big to be Kurt, which Sasuke assumed to be Dr. McCoy.

(He thought he remembered someone mentioning that Dr. McCoy and Raven had been friends once, but he hadn’t had enough reason to pay attention to back then to be sure now.)

Raven sat stiffly, and Sasuke was pretty sure her eyes were fixed on Anna Marie, even if she couldn’t see as well from this distance as he could. Undeveloped or not, an eye with a Sharingan was almost always better at sight distance than any non-Doujutsu eye, barring mutant-enhanced senses.

Tony put a hand on Sasuke’s shoulder and squeezed, just hard enough for Sasuke to realize that he’d been tensing up in anticipation himself. He forced himself to relax, and leaned into his uncle’s touch, turning it into an actual hug that he was _maybe_ a bit too old for now, but Pepper and Ms. Do… _Raven_ had both told him that he was never too old for hugs.

As they came to a stop in front of the school, Raven clicked something on her watch, took a deep breath, and stepped out of the car.

“Hello, Raven.” The Professor greeted her with a level of warmth that Sasuke didn’t think he’d ever seen before. The Professor was always nice, but… not like this.

“Charles. Hank.” Raven nodded stiffly at each of them, and then turned her attention to Anna Marie, who was now shying away into the shadow of Charles’s wheelchair, and seeming much more timid than usual. She was staring at Raven with wide eyes, her lip trembling.

“Mom?”

Raven’s stance and expression softened, and she knelt down to be closer to Anna Marie’s height. “Hello, Marie. I’m sorry for leaving you alone all this time.”

“Mom!” Anna Marie broke away from Charles and ran over to Raven, who engulfed her in a tight, soothing hug.

Sasuke looked away, suddenly feeling like he was looking at something very personal, but feeling very empty and even… envious.

He would never have that kind of reunion. Not with his parents, at least.

“Sweetheart, I’m sorry.” Raven muttered against the hood that Anna Marie was wearing over her head, probably for this very purpose. “I’m so very sorry, but there wasn’t any… I couldn’t stay.”

“But _Mom_ ,” Anna Marie started, and then faltered as though she just couldn’t figure out how to say it, and just looked at Charles instead.

Raven frowned, and looked at Charles. “You’ve all been tip-toeing around something since Sasuke figured out who I was. Just _what_ is going on, Charles?”

The Professor smiled, just the tiniest bit. “He isn’t dead, Raven.”

Sasuke could hear the sharp intake of breath, even from all the way over where he was.

“Who?” Raven demanded, her embrace of Anna Marie visibly tightening. “Which…?”

Charles’s smile widened, and one word was really all that he needed for his answer. “Kurt.”

Sasuke had an inkling that the man had sent out a call psychically, because Kurt bamfed into his lap half a second later.

Raven stood, slowly, taking in the sight of her child for the first time in over a decade. Anna Marie moved to the side, excited enough for this occasion that she didn’t try to press for more time of her own.

“ _Hello, mother_.” Kurt didn’t bother with English, nor try to get closer to Raven. The young mutant simply sat in the Professor’s lap, with a nervous grin and an excitedly waving tail that threatened to cut off ‘Uncle’ Charles’s nose.

Raven took one step forward. Then another. Then she broke out into a run, scooping Kurt up into her arms when she reached the wheelchair and…

Sasuke turned away again. Crying people almost _always_ meant the moment wasn’t something he was supposed to see.

“Well, it’s nice to see them playing happy families.” Tony muttered, squatting down beside Sasuke. “Do you know who Kurt’s dad was?”

“Some red teleporting demonic mutant in Europe that people always thought was the devil.” Sasuke said, remembering the secondhand account he’d gotten from Kurt and Anna Marie, which they themselves had heard from the Professor.

“He was quite the charmer.” Hank joined them a second later. “I was never quite sure of his intentions, but he and Raven didn’t seem to mind getting together for a few afternoons back when she was already married.”

“Whoa, wait what? This sounds like telenovela-type drama.” Tony turned to Hank. “Tell me more.”

“Not much to tell. Raven was married to a rather wealthy man at the time. Nice guy, very rich, completely human, dreadfully in love, treated her like a princess and all that. But he wanted an heir, and he wasn’t exactly… the most fertile of men.” Hank put it as delicately as he could with a child present. “And he saw that a good friend of his was getting along with his wife and apparently decided that he didn’t mind if the kid wasn’t _technically_ his so long as he got to raise it.”

“I’m guessing it didn’t work out like that.” Tony made a sympathetic face.

“Not really.” Hank shook his head. “The midwife went wailing into the town about demons, a mob got rustled up, the husband got killed, and Raven tried to escape with Kurt by going into the river on a small rowboat. She passed out due to some injuries after several hours on the water, and woke up to find that she was being resuscitated by someone on a beach and Kurt was nowhere to be seen. She’d had his name sewn into all his clothing before he was born, so at least the people that found him knew that much, but Raven… she never found out he was alive before disappearing.”

“You couldn’t use Cerebro?” Sasuke asked, remembering the machine.

“It doesn’t work that way, kiddo. Trying to find a specific mutant, especially a child or an infant, runs the risk of causing brain damage in the target. Raven was already convinced he was dead, and we didn’t want to give her hope only to be the cause of the child’s actual death.” Hank shrugged. “It seems to have all worked out in the end.”

“Yeah, only now I’ll be needing a new nanny.” Tony complained.

“I’m old enough to not need one now!” Sasuke complained right back. “I’m almost a legal adult in Konoha!”

“Yeah, in your village. Because of ninja rules. Not here in the US, which is comparatively modern, and that’s saying something, considering the kinds of people we’ve got piling up in all our weirdest nooks and crannies.” Tony wanted to be open to other cultures. He usually was.

But again: _ninjas_. Legal adult at twelve, or whenever you passed the test (which could be as young as _five_ , apparently). Ready to kill whenever you became an adult. Forced to work for a living the second you passed that exam, unless you happened to have a support net of parents ready to catch you.

Seriously, that place gave him the creeps and he was _from_ there, sort of.

“But,” He held up a hand, “I think I can trust you enough with the little _henge_ thing for you to stay with me or Pepper or Obie most of the time, instead of making you stay home with a nanny. As for Konoha… I really would feel better if there was someone taking care of you there.”

“There are orphans in my class that have been living on their own for years!” Sasuke argued.

“Sasuke, I don’t know if you know this, but living on your own is… a lot of work.” Tony scratched the back of his head. “We’ll talk about it later.”

“Boys?”

Sasuke turned to look at the Professor, who was wheeling over to them now. The man smiled and nodded at the school. “Maybe we should give them some more privacy. There’s lunch inside, if you’re hungry.”

“Got any burgers?” Tony asked, standing up straight. “And don’t you want to talk to your sister a bit longer?”

“She’ll be staying a bit longer than expected.” The Professor smiled. “Thank you for convincing her to visit, Sasuke.”

Sasuke looked to the side and tried to keep his face blank.

(He wasn’t sure if he wanted to smile or pout or even cry. He was happy for them, really, but envy was a powerful, powerful thing.)

(Tony’s arm across his shoulders is at least a bit of a reminder that he isn’t alone.)

Well, at least lunch at the school is usually pretty tasty.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hopefully the wait was worth your while.


	16. The Festival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Sasuke decides on a default disguise and finally has a chance to show off his normal-person skills in Konoha.

**September 21, 2006**  
**7:42 PM**  
**Malibu, California**

“This is really what you’re going with?” Tony asked, crossing his arms and leaning back on the stool he was using as a seat.

“Is there something wrong with it?” Sasuke chanced a glance at the reflective glass of the doors. The henge didn’t _seem_ like it was wonky at all.

“I think what Tony is trying to say is that he isn’t sure if it’s a good idea to use your dead cousin as an inspiration for your disguise.” Pepper said, translating Tony’s sentiment as delicately as she could.

Sasuke looked back at the doors. Shisui’s face stared back.

“Why not? I know the face better than most, and I can change my mannerisms much more easily if I have something to base them off of.” Sasuke glanced down. “And he didn’t die when everyone else did, so I won’t have flashbacks, if that’s what you’re worried about. I’ve even used him for _henge_ before, with Ms. Douglas, remember?”

“There’s also the fact that your cousin looks about fifteen.” Pepper offered. “Not quite old enough to follow us around pretending to be a bodyguard.”

Sasuke frowned at a criticism he couldn’t quite think of a counterpoint to, and then shrugged and reapplied the henge. An older version of Shisui, maybe twenty-five years old, now stood in his place. “Is this better?”

Pepper and Tony glanced at each other. Tony shrugged, still a little uneasy, but incapable of really arguing why using Shisui as a basis for disguise might be a bad idea.

“I suppose this will work for now.” Pepper finally said, when it became clear that no one else was going to say anything. “Now, let me walk you through how you should act when you’re with us, because there’s a good chance that the rules and standard operating procedures will be different from what you’ve been taught as a shinobi.”

“I can learn it.” Sasuke promised.

o.o.o.o.o

 **October 10, 2006**  
**5:31 PM**  
**Konohagakure no Sato**

The Kyuubi festival was one of the largest events of the year, and certainly the largest of the ones that Konoha alone hosted. Every country and village had a handful of festivals that no one else celebrated, even if other festivals were more common. The Kyuubi festival, for instance, was Konoha’s way of honoring the victims of the Kyuubi’s rampage and the Yondaime’s sacrifice to defeat it.

This was Sasuke’s first year going alone.

He was eleven years old, which was considered more than old enough to wander about unaccompanied by parents. Most children, however, had friends to run about with, if they took the opportunity to ditch their families. With Tony back in the States and Ms. Darkholme finally reunited with her family, Sasuke had no one to go with.

He couldn’t skip, of course. That was just disrespecting the dead.

(There was nothing to commemorate the Uchiha massacre, of course. There was no victory that day, not even a bittersweet one.)

Sasuke stared at himself in the mirror, noted the bags under his eyes that only seemed deeper for the dark blue of his festival kimono, and took a deep breath. He squeezed his eyes shut as he breathed out, and when he opened them again, his face had smoothed over into the blank, contemptuous mask that he wore out in public whenever he was in Konoha.

“Into the breach,” He muttered to himself as he left the house, taking the packed dirt road out of the Uchiha district and towards the festival grounds. The lights and music reached him before he reached the crowds, but it was a close thing.

“Hello, Uchiha-kun.” One of the vendors waved, smiling. He was standing behind a tank of fish, countless paper nets arranged behind him. “Care to play?”

“No,” he said. Pepper and Raven’s voices mixed in his head, memories of reprimands floating past. He grudgingly added, “Thank you. Maybe later.”

“Alright. Goodbye, Uchiha-kun.” The vendor turned to the next set of potential patrons, and once again tried to entice some festival-goers to play.

“Sasuke-kun!”

Sasuke fought the urge to stiffen as the high pitched squeal reached him with a pair of skinny arms around his shoulders. They were stronger than they looked, as only befit the girl they belonged to.

“Ino.” He struggled a little. “Get off.”

With one last squeeze, Ino released him, and Sasuke turned around to face her, holding back a sigh.

“I wasn’t expecting to see you here!” She gushed. Had she been less annoying, Sasuke might have gone so far as to compliment her on her kimono, or the flower in her hair, because Ino (and her father, and her mother, and her cousins) had a good eye for color and fashion, and even Sasuke could admit that she looked good.

“It’s the Kyuubi festival. Everyone goes.” He wondered how quickly he could get out of this conversation.

“Well, yeah, but that makes it really hard to find anyone if you don’t plan things out beforehand.” Ino pouted. It was cute. Sasuke wanted to leave.

 “How about we leave Uchiha-kun alone now, Ino?” Ino’s dad put his hand on his daughter’s back, gently pushing her away from Sasuke. “I’m sure he has plans of his own.”

Sasuke knows the man is trying to help, considering the sympathetic look on his face. On the other hand, he _didn’t_ have any plans of his own, or anyone to find and hang out with. And honestly… Ino was better than nothing. “Not particularly.”

“So Sasuke can come with us!” Ino insisted, grabbing her father’s hand and tugging until he looked down at her puppy eyes.

Ino’s dad tore his eyes away from his daughter and looked at Sasuke, raising an eyebrow. “You sure about that, kid?”

“So long as nobody hugs me.” Wow, that had been almost Tony-like. He promised himself not to tell Pepper that he was taking after his uncle, ever.

Ino squealed and grabbed his sleeve, dragging him off through the crowd, her parents following sedately behind.

As the night progressed, Sasuke found that Ino wasn’t terrible company, once she’d mellowed out a little and come down from the high of getting to be with Sasuke for a little. She dragged him into a few games, and he agreed to about half. Towards the end of the night, she pulled him over to a stand at the edges of the festival grounds, the areas that bordered the cemetery, filled with vendors that sold flowers and incense and other offerings for the dead.

“Hey, Fu-nii-chan!” Ino bounced up to the table and smiled to the frazzled-looking older teen that was manning it. “Fu-nii-chan, this is Uchiha Sasuke! Sasuke-kun, this is my cousin Fu!”

“Hey there, kid.” Fu waved at Sasuke, who dipped his head back in acknowledgement. “Ino-chan, have you seen your parents anywhere? The fridge I was keeping the spare stock in broke down.”

Ino’s face grew uncharacteristically serious, and she nodded. “I left them a few stalls back, ‘cuz they were talking to Shika’s parents. I’ll go get my dad.”

“Thanks, Ino-chan.” Fu watched her go with a tired smile, and then caught sight of Sasuke’s expression. “Something wrong?”

“I, ah…” Sasuke bit his lip as he tried to figure out how to phrase his offer. “My uncle’s an engineer. I… He’s been teaching me. I’m nowhere near his level, but I’m pretty good with appliances, so I could take a look if you want? If it’s a simple problem, then I should probably be able to fix it, or at least tell you how to fix it, if something needs to be replaced.”

Fu puffed out his cheeks and blew out a sigh. “Well, if you say so. Break anything, though, and you’re the one paying for the professional repairs.”

“Understood.” Sasuke nodded and, after a second’s consideration, vaulted over the counter. “Where’s the fridge?”

“Around back.” Fu lead him behind the showcase to the glass-front refrigerator, filled with flowers of various colors. “I have a toolkit in the back, if you want to get one of the panels off.”

“That would probably be a good idea.” Sasuke nodded distractedly, checking over the cord to make sure it wasn’t simply a matter of the energy not making it from the socket to the machine. After a second’s thought, he unplugged the machine and plugged his phone in, to see if the plug itself was working. It was, so that was good news, but it didn’t tell him much about what the problem actually was.

“JARVIS?” He asked, pulling the fridge away from the wall as he waited for a connection to the AI to spring to life. “Can you tell me anything about common problems that show up in this model?”

“What model, Sasuke?”

Sasuke leaned over to look at the front, just as Fu came back with the toolkit. “Uh… Shibashi, FN-2300. It’s a Konoha-based company, I think.”

Sasuke got to work on removing the panels, ignoring Fu almost entirely, as JARVIS rattled off a short list of the most common technical difficulties that cropped up with the appliance in question.

Sasuke peered at the mess of wires and piping that made up the back of the fridge, and then snorted. “Fu, I think I found your problem.”

“Yeah?”

“You’ve got rodents.” Sasuke pointed at a small cluster of wires and cables towards the bottom of the machine, and almost laughed as Fu caught sight of the evidence that they’d been chewed clean through. “I can replace the wires, if I get some replacements and maybe a soldering iron.”

“I’ll, uh, I’ll tell Inoichi.” Fu pinched the bridge of his nose. “That’s… kind of embarrassing.”

“Less common than you’d think, but small animals have been causing trouble with technology since the beginning.” Sasuke was partially quoting Tony on the latter half, but considering he’d only offered in the first place so he could show off…

Ugh, he really _was_ spending too much time with his uncle. Pepper was going to be so disappointed.

“Fu?” Ino’s dad called from the front of the kiosk, and the teenager hurried off as Sasuke kept looking around to see if there were any other problems. There was nothing readily apparent, at least, so he leaned down again and started checking out where everything connected to, so he could figure out what, exactly, the right way to fix this was.

“Kyaa!” And _that_ was Ino. “Sasuke-kun is so smart!”

Sasuke did his best to ignore her. “Ah, did Fu tell you what the problem was?”

“Yes, he did.” Inoichi’s arms were crossed. “I wasn’t aware you knew anything about engineering, Sasuke-kun.”

Sasuke shrugged awkwardly. “My uncle’s been teaching me. The fridge is pretty basic, so even if the problem was less obvious it shouldn’t have been too hard.”

“Aa.” Inoichi nodded, letting the silence afterward stretch to the point where even Sasuke and Ino could tell it was getting uncomfortable.

“Would you like me to fix it, or would you rather get a professional?” Sasuke finally said, when the silence got to the point of ridiculousness.

“Let’s see what you can do.” Inoichi said, folding his hands behind his back in a way that implied he’d be putting them in his pockets if he wasn’t wearing festival clothing. “I’ll walk you to the hardware store. There should still be someone manning it.”

“Is it usually staffed during things like this?” Sasuke stood up, brushing himself off, and mentally ran through the list of what he’d need to fix the appliance.

“With this much electricity running outdoors all at once, and little children and drunk people stumbling into anything and everything? They make more money than you’d think just providing for emergencies. No one wants something to go down in the middle of a festival.” Inoichi informed him. “Ino, stay here with your mother. Help Fu with the arrangements.”

Ino pouted for a second, probably because she couldn’t go with Sasuke, but nodded. “Okay, daddy.”

Sasuke missed the look that passed between Inoichi and his wife as they walked away.

“So, you said your uncle taught you… that?” Inoichi said after they were about a block further back into the festival grounds.

“Yeah. He’s kind of…” Sasuke made a vague motion with arms, meant to somehow indicate ‘a big deal,’ or maybe ‘really, really good,’ “with electronics.”

“Oh?” Inoichi smiled. “Have I heard of him?”

Sasuke paused, running through what little he knew of Ino’s dad in his head, and coming to a conclusion that he really should have gotten to at least a few minutes ago. “…if you’re as high-ranked as I think you are, then you probably know everything from his blood type to his shoe size.”

Inoichi threw back his head and laughed, loud and sudden enough that Sasuke almost entered a combat stance in reflex. He barely managed to stifle a jump as it was.

“Aa, we’re not quite that interested in the minutiae, but yes, I do know of Stark Tony.” Inoichi chuckled, and Sasuke hoped the man hadn’t noticed his instinctive flinch at hearing his uncle’s name said the right way. He’d spent far too much time in the west for anything other than ‘Tony Stark’ to sound natural.

“So you know who taught me how to work with technology.” Sasuke grumbled. “Why ask?”

“I wanted to see if you’d name-drop or not,” Inoichi said, just as they reached the hardware store. He pushed the door open and gestured for Sasuke to go in first. “And I wanted to see if you’d try to exaggerate your abilities.”

“It’s just some chewed-through wires,” Sasuke’s voice was a mumble as he browsed through the wiring section. “And they’re not all that hard to replace. It’s a fridge that uses standard-model equipment, so the wires are sold in those weird bundles with pre-made ends. And if we can’t find that, I _could_ technically splice the wires back together and hold it together with electrical tape long enough for you to hire someone that has access to the right parts.”

“That’s very kind of you.” Inoichi said, and Sasuke tried to ignore the niggling, highly accurate voice that was telling him that Inoichi was humoring him and not taking him entirely seriously.

Whatever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I can’t pull anything more out of that scene. There was nothing of worth left and I’m tired of trying to figure out how to end it.
> 
> I have been having so much trouble writing recently ugh.


	17. The Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which secrets are told, kept, revealed, and mistakenly come across in the middle of one of the only parts of Manhattan where alleys are actually enough of a thing that teens with superpowers can face down groups of criminals and nobody even notices.

**December 9, 2006**  
**12:21 PM**  
**Westchester, New York**

“Okay, but you’re wrong.” Sasuke insisted, looking Anna Marie dead in the eye. “It’s completely uncalled for and unnecessary.”

“It’s cute and they make each other better.” She argued back. “Why do you even hate it so much? What bothers you about ‘em?”

“He’s, like, literally a hundred times her age!” Sasuke jabbed a finger at the computer screen with the open wiki page. He could feel Kurt and David rolling their eyes behind him, and Kitty was already distracted, but this was important, dammit. “I know he says nine hundred, but he spent at _least_ a full millennium as the eighth doctor, and was four hundred and fifty as the first, which gives us a minimum of a millennium and a half, _plus_ all the time spent as two through seven and whatever time the ninth put into the Time War!”

“You’ve seen the way he checks his ears in the mirror in the first episode,” Anna Marie pointed out. “He’s only been Nine for a really short time then.”

“That doesn’t change the fact that Rose is nineteen and the Tenth Doctor is closer to nineteen _hundred_.” Sasuke pointed out. “Not to mention the general power imbalance. The Doctor is practically a god and she’s just a particularly lucky and athletic human. She isn’t unimportant, but she’s practically a baby compared to him.”

Anna Marie crossed her arms and huffed. “I still think they’re cute.”

“And I’m still glad she’s gone and am absolutely looking forward to the new season, starring _someone other than Rose_.” Sasuke was a very mature young man, and so stuck his tongue out in Anna Marie’s direction, garnering exactly the same response from her.

“Are you two done arguing about boring stuff yet?” Kitty asked, leaning back through her chair to stare at them. “Because it really is. Boring, I mean. Nobody cares except you.”

“The internet does!” Anna Marie immediately said. “The internet cares a _lot_.”

Kitty made a face. “But there’s so much other stuff on the internet that isn’t boring.”

Sasuke and Anna Marie shared a look. They may have disagreed on the particulars, but they did agree on the importance of cheesy science fiction.

David sighed, once more wondering why they were all in his room instead of somewhere else. Kurt patted him on the shoulder consolingly.

o.o.o.o.o

**December 9, 2006**  
**3:46 PM**  
**Westchester, New York**

“So…” Sasuke wasn’t normally prone to filling up silences with random words that were largely designed to fill up said silences, but the lack of conversation was currently stifling. Kurt had asked him to talk privately, so they’d gone outside and sat on a stone wall that cut off the edge of a hill to make room for a walkway, dangling their legs over the edge.

When someone asked you to talk and then sat in clearly nervous silence for several minutes, it generally got very awkward, very quickly. Living with Tony had exposed Sasuke to the tactic of filling awkward silences frequently enough that it now felt strange to revert to the silent habits that he’d had for several years after… well, after Itachi.

“Kurt?” Sasuke finally said, after his earlier attempt did nothing to get his friend to talk. “Is there a point to you asking me to come here, or are we just going to sit in silence until dinner?”

Kurt flinched, but seemed to jolt out of whatever haze had gripped him. “I need to tell you something.”

Sasuke waited, and when an explanation didn’t follow, gestured impatiently for Kurt to keep going. “And?”

“I don’t… I don’t know _how_ to tell you.” Kurt said, fingers twisting around each other.

(The back of Sasuke’s mind commented that it was lucky shinobi opportunities were nonexistent outside of the Elemental Nations; having only three fingers per hand would have made learning hand signs an absolutely terrible experience.)

“Start at the beginning.” Sasuke more ordered than suggested, because when it really came down to it, he could _try_ to be sensitive and patient, but he ultimately had very shallow reserves of both virtues. “Or at whichever part is most important.”

Kurt stared for a second and then, like it was being torn out, blurted, “I think I’m trans.”

Sasuke blinked once. Twice. “What?”

Kurt deflated. “I know I’m only thirteen and a lot of people think that—”

“No, stop, _Kurt_.” Sasuke grabbed his friend by the shoulders. “I don’t know what that word means. I said ‘what’ because I’m confused. English isn’t my first language either. I _literally_ have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“…Ah.”

Sasuke let go of Kurt’s shoulders and turned back to face out from the hill. Languages were… people got over their pride very quickly when learning a new language. It was hard, thankless work that rarely stuck or made sense like, say, math or chakra control. Sasuke, when learning English, had had to let go of his pride and learn to ask for the meanings of words if he wanted to get anywhere, and that difficulty in adjusting to English was something he and Kurt had bonded over.

“I think…” Kurt paused, tongue darting out along lips as though trying to taste the words to figure out which ones to use, though it could have just as easily been a symptom of nerves. “I think I identify more as a girl than as a boy, despite what my body is like and what my birth certificate says.”

Sasuke mulled over the words for a bit, parsing them out. “Okay. Do I need to change how I talk to you?”

Kurt stared at Sasuke for a few moments, wide-eyed. “I… not yet. I haven’t told anyone else, yet.”

“Not even your mom or sister?” Sasuke frowned. “Wouldn’t the Professor know, anyway? Or Ms. Frost? Or Dr. Grey?”

Telepaths.

Telepaths _everywhere_.

“They try to stay out of our personal lives unless there’s an emergency. I think the Professor only allows a passive scan of emotions, so he can pick up panic and things that can cause or be caused by bad situations.” Kurt stopped. “Um… no, I haven’t told Mother or Anna Marie.”

“Because…?” Sasuke had a feeling he knew why, but he wanted to be sure. Konoha’s shinobi population was largely ambivalent on the subject of sexuality so long as bloodlines didn’t die out and deprive the village of useful weapons, but gender roles were much more rigidly enforced.

He still wasn’t entirely sure why, but they were.

(Tony had thrown his hands up in the air after a story that hit rather strongly on the subject, and used his favorite excuse of “Ninjas!” which almost seemed to be a curse when it came out of his mouth by now. Sasuke had been confused and somewhat insulted initially, but he’d realized soon enough that Tony’s habit was his way of inserting humor into a situation that made him uncomfortable.)

(The situation, of course, was ninjas.)

(Just their existence, really.)

“I do not know how they will take it.” Kurt said, staring morosely at ~~his~~ _her_ feet. “You are… you are rarely here, and you deal with a life that is more fantastical than even that of mutants. You are a ninja, so you know how to keep secrets. You are safer to tell, because even if you didn’t approve, you wouldn’t tell anyone.”

Sasuke shifted, acutely uncomfortable. What Kurt had said wasn’t _wrong_ at all, but it was a bit awkward to hear it said aloud. “I guess?”

He rolled his next thought around his head a bit more before he said out aloud into the awkward silence that had sprung up. “I think you should tell your mom. Or someone else at the school. Anna Marie adores you, and I think David would understand no matter what.”

Kurt shrugged, shoulders hunched inwards. “Maybe.”

There was a pregnant pause that stretched to the point of awkwardness.

“Do you have a name picked out?” Sasuke asked, trying to steer towards what was probably a safer topic.

“I want something that starts with the same letter, and is German.” She said. “I like Kerstin and Kharmen, but I am not sure yet. Certainly not Katherine or anything similar; it would cause great confusion with Kitty, I think.”

Sasuke nodded along.

“Do you need anything else?” He said, when no other questions came to mind. He felt like there ought to be something else to say, but he just… couldn’t really think of anything relevant.

“Not really.”

o.o.o.o.o

**June 2, 2007**  
**7:27 PM**  
**Stark Mansion, New York**

Sasuke stood behind Tony, face impassive as he watched the guests that wandered through his uncle’s 37th birthday party. He was wearing his Shisui-based disguise, the henge with his cousin’s face and a three-piece suit.

He also had a kunai holster at his leg, hidden under the solid illusion that was henge, and had a fake gun in a fake holster attached to his fake belt.

Henge was useful.

“Having fun?” Pepper asked as she stepped up next to him, watching Tony and Obadiah schmooze with some random government official.

“Not particularly, no.” Sasuke scanned the room again to check for possible threats. “Happy?”

“No sign of anything yet.” The voice chirped in his ear, using the small devices Tony had designed himself. “And can I add that I still don’t feel comfortable making an eleven-year-old the visible defense?”

“Almost twelve,” Sasuke said before he could stop himself. “And with shinobi training. I was taking down horse-sized boar before you even met me.”

“Boys,” Pepper’s voice held a warning. “Behave.”

“Yes, Ms. Potts.” Happy sighed. “You feel like trading out at any point kid, you just let me know. Sure as hell can’t be fun for a kid to be at this thing.”

“Hn.” Sasuke didn’t say it out loud, but Happy was right. The party was, despite being a party, _incredibly_ boring. “I’ll check with you about that in fifteen minutes.”

Those fifteen minutes passed much as the first hour and a half had, with more people arriving all the time. Sasuke knew that, as a shinobi, he’d be getting even longer shifts, averaging on eight or more hours, for clients that he cared about far less than his Uncle.

That said, he wasn't getting paid for this and honestly had no obligation to be there, other than sheer paranoia and filial piety, neither of which were all that important to anyone except Sasuke, and even he was flagging in his devotion to the concepts. He held a champagne glass up to his face, eyeing his reflection in the glass and feeling the weight of Pepper’s disapproving gaze. If he drank even a single sip, he was in trouble.

The reflection of Shisui’s face, bored and impassive as his cousin’s had never actually been in life, stared back at him.

“Happy, I’m ready to switch out.” He said after examining his reflection for a bit. Henge didn’t require a massive amount of chakra for upkeep the way some techniques did, not after initial setting, but there was still a small, steady drain on his reserves that was starting to get annoying.

They performed the exchange more or less flawlessly, and Tony didn’t even acknowledge it. Sasuke made his way out of the room and up the stairs to the private area. There were at least two closed doors with some kind of clothing item on the doorknob, which he pointedly ignored on his way to the bathroom to ditch the henge.

He locked the door behind him, dropped henge, and fixed himself up as well as possible. While no one really paid attention to children at these things, a child that wasn’t well-dressed and clean was going to garner some questions. So long as he was more or less presentable, he was also more or less invisible.

A knock sounded from the door. “Hey, are you done? I gotta pee!”

A girl, maybe his age. He made a face at the mirror and then sighed and went to open the door.

“Eh?” The girl, with black hair and eyes, and pale skin, could have fit in with any number of clans in Konoha if not for the European cast of her face. There were Asian features, sure, but there was definitely a mix. “Who’re you? I saw a bodyguard come in here.”

Sasuke thought a few words that would likely have gotten Raven to threaten to scrub his mouth with soap, back when she’d been around. “He climbed out the window.”

The girl looked past him at the admittedly large window, brow furrowing in consternation. “Why?”

“I didn’t ask.” That was a great excuse, actually. It wasn’t like anyone would expect him to know if the supposed bodyguard hadn’t said anything. “Who are you?”

“Kate Bishop!” The girl stuck out a hand, and he could tell that she was trying to seem mature and important. It was cute enough that he felt the sudden urge to pat her on the head. He wasn’t entirely sure where the condescension had come from, but he was sure there was at least one adult in his life that was that much of an ass.

He shook her hand, and then stepped out of the way. “The bathroom’s all yours.”

Kate stared him down for a second, and then said. “Stay here. You’re the only other kid here and I’m bored.”

She closed the door in his face before he could come up with an excuse, and all Sasuke could think of was how badly everything was going to go if Kate happened to mention his existence to anyone. _Someone_ was going to question Tony as to which guest had brought him, and he couldn’t just disappear before she came back out because that would make her even more likely to complain to her parents about him.

He resolved to ask her to keep their short friendship a secret, because civilian kids _loved_ being entrusted with stuff like that.

(Tony and Pepper, upon hearing the night’s events, were not amused.)

o.o.o.o.o

**July 23, 2007  
Dubai, United Arab Emirates**

Sasuke had no idea why Tony chose this city for his twelfth birthday, but it was… impressive.

o.o.o.o.o

**September 14, 2007**  
**2:03 PM**  
**New York City, New York**

Sasuke shifted the bag in his arms to one hand, pulling out a phone to check the time. He had a few hours left until Tony was finished, and that meant he had plenty of time to… entertain himself, basically. He’d gone shopping for parts for the newest project Tony had set him on, refusing to let him use any of the materials they had in the NYC Stark Labs and insisting Sasuke find and buy them on his own time.

Sasuke still wasn’t entirely sure why, but it did mean he had an excuse to explore the city on his own. Chinatown, for instance, was nice and vaguely familiar, in the sense that every fifth or tenth store or restaurant was Japanese instead of Chinese. Seeing Shisui’s face reflected in the windowpanes was barely startling him anymore, too.

His ears caught the slightest noise coming from an upcoming alleyway, and he was in a ready stance before his brain had even caught up to recognize the noises as those of a fight. He crept forward, putting away his phone after pressing a few buttons to mute it and turn on the recording. He carried the bag low to the ground, so he could drop it with minimum damage if needed. He didn’t have many weapons, and certainly didn’t want to pull them out in public, but against civilians, his fists would be good enough, assuming his henge held.

When he peered around the corner, he saw nothing. So he followed the sounds further, and climbed to the top of the nearest building via fire escapes and chakra-enhanced jumps. When he popped his head up to look over the roof, he didn’t quite believe what he was seeing. This wasn’t because he’d never seen anything of the like before, but rather that he’d never seen its ilk outside of the Hidden Continent.

(Outside of Konoha, basically, because while he’d traveled the world, he hadn’t quite managed to get to parts of the Elemental Nations that weren’t less than fifteen miles away from his hometown.)

A girl only two or three years older than him, with long, straight green hair that reached her mid-back was facing away from him, arms outstretched at a group of men in what appeared to be surplus tactical clothing.

Sasuke could have accepted the hair as a wig and the standoff as a matter of reputation rather than power, if not for the dozen floating guns around the girl, all facing away from her and towards the men.

“—thought you could back out on your end of the deal?” She said, with an accent Sasuke couldn’t place and a tone that bode ill. The back of his mind, the part that sounded like Tony, mused that this would all look a lot more dramatic at night, instead of with bright, bright sunlight. “You told me you knew where my father was. You are going to give me that information. Now.”

Sasuke wasn’t entirely sure what to do. On the one hand, it was a dozen men against a single teenage girl. On the other hand, the single teenage girl seemed to be the one calling the shots and possibly being the bad guy. It was entirely possible that the best decision to make was to call the police.

The girl made a frustrated noise and scrunched up her hands. Sasuke lurched, going for a tackle that would never make it in time, but his fears were unfounded; rather than shooting the men, the girl had sent the guns careening towards them, knocking each one out with a slam of metal to the temple. A second later, her fists twisted and came in towards her chest, and each gun curled in on itself with a screech of metal. She spun to leave, jumped off the side of the building and _floated_ down to the alleyway. She turned to exit, and froze.

“Hi.” Sasuke said, arms crossed and leaning against the wall where the alley hit the street. He jerked his head up towards where they’d both just been, before he caught on to the plan and beat her to the ground. “Nice show.”

The girl eyed him warily. “Yeah?”

“Mm-hm.” Sasuke didn’t really know what he was doing, but he wanted more information on the situation. Shisui always had been very good at getting girls to talk, through some combination of charm and a pretty face that Sasuke still couldn’t perfectly mimic, no matter how hard he tried. But hey, maybe doing it under duress was the trick to doing it right. “So, there a story behind this?”

“Depends on how much you heard.” The girl had a pretty face, even though it was currently twisted with exhaustion and suspicion. “You local?”

“I heard some. And no, I’m not.” His home was Konoha, or arguably Malibu. New York was… a vacation house, at best. “You?”

“Sorta. Lived in France for a few years. Nice place.” She was edging towards the alley wall. “Why are you here?”

“Shopping.” He jiggled the plastic bag looped around his wrist. “And I heard the sounds of a fight coming from over here. You said something about your father?”

“He’s in prison. No one will tell me where.” She was almost halfway to the exit. “Who are you?”

“Shisui.” He said before he could stop and think it over. “Shisui Uchiha. And yourself?””

“Lorna Dane.” She was just a few feet away, now. “You don’t seem surprised by… how I fight, let’s say.”

“Yours aren’t the strangest powers I’ve seen.” Sasuke twisted his henge just the slightest bit, and the Sharingan sprang to life… or seemed to, at any rate. “Telekinesis?”

“Magnetism.” Lorna slipped around the corner and into the larger street. “See ya, I guess.”

Sasuke watched her leave, then brought a hand down to his pocket to pull out his phone. “JARVIS, you got that?”

“Yes, Mister Sasuke.”

“Please tell me you know what happened.”

As it stood, Sasuke didn’t see Lorna again for over a decade.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Me putting the final scene in Chinatown happened because I basically couldn't think of any other place in Manhattan where the streets are narrow enough that this could feasibly happen.


	18. The Graduation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasuke graduates and meets his team. It's about as normal as one can expect.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hate going through the Stations of the Canon. They're exhausting.

**February 16, 2008**   
**12:42 PM**   
**Konohagakure**

Sasuke looked down at his hands, and the hitai-ate that was there.

He was a shinobi now.

Huh.

Onto his forehead it went, snug against his skull, and he made his way out to the Academy yard. He thanked his lucky stars that his surname was near the beginning of the Hiragana alphabet, because that meant he could escape before most of the girls got out. Before most people in general got out, actually. Shino, Kiba, and Chouji were already done, metal glinting on their heads. He gave them a short nod as he exited the Academy yard and headed home. He had a call to make.

(He awkwardly ignored the sight of Naruto on the swingset, looking morose and lacking a hitai-ate, because that was definitely not a situation he wanted to get involved in. Good at comforting people, he was not.)

The call went about how he expected, actually.

“I knew you could do it. You’ve been top of your class for a while, haven’t you?” Tony’s voice was joking, mostly. “I’m proud of you, though, kiddo. You’ve been working towards this for a long time.”

Sasuke wasn’t entirely sure if this was the kind of praise that most kids got (there was an undercurrent of “duh, of course you succeeded,” that left him feeling a bit underwhelmed), but he was aware that his Uncle was trying, so he took the congratulations for what they were. “I know I said I didn’t care if you came to my genin exam, but my first Chuunin exam is probably in the next two or three years.”

“I know, kiddo. I promised I’d come to that one.” Tony might have been laughing, there. “Trust me, I’ll be there no matter what.”

“Unless you’re dying.”

“Unless I’m dying.” Tony agreed, because this had recently become a _thing_ for Sasuke, and he was willing to play along with it. Sasuke knew he was getting a bit strange about some things, but he’d seen Tony push himself through enough science-induced injuries for the sake of a breakthrough that Tony doing something important despite being in the middle of dying was a legitimate concern.

At least, Sasuke thought so.

“You’re meeting your team tomorrow.” Tony said, pointing out the tiny little issue that was liable to crop up. “Anxious?”

“No.” Sasuke said immediately, glad that he was inside his own house and not somewhere that would lead to him getting psycho-analyzed by a dozen overly paranoid ninja. “I’m just not sure I’ll be placed with someone I can easily work with.”

“Teamwork is called work for a reason, kid.” Tony pointed out. “I’m not exactly a team player either, but I do know that it’s something that takes time and effort, no matter who you’re working with. If I were on a team with no one but Pepper and Rhodey, I’d still have trouble making it work unless I tried really hard. With anyone else, it would be even worse.”

“I know, Uncle. The fact that it’s going to be so hard is what I’m worried about in the first place.” Sasuke made a face and walked over to his fridge, checking over the contents. He could make… eggs, maybe. “There’s a number of people in class that are probably going to cause trouble if they’re placed with me, no matter how much effort I, personally, put in.”

“Is this about the girls, again?” Tony asked.

“Mostly.” Sasuke admitted, pinching the phone between his ear and shoulder as he started setting up his after-school snack. “There are a couple of boys that like to pick fights for whatever reason.”

“Are you being a dick?”

“…I don’t _think_ so. If I was acting like you, at least I’d know how to fix the problem.” Sasuke said, and smirked as Tony sputtered on the other end of the line.

“Rude!” Tony finally exclaimed. “I’ll have you know that I am the _epitome_ of class.”

Sasuke didn’t say anything.

“…I _am_ , and you know it.”

“Uncle Tony, are you pouting?”

“Absolutely not. I am a grown man. Adults don’t pout.”

“Sulking?”

“What did I do to deserve a sassy little brat like you in my life? I’m a good person!” Tony paused, “Mostly!”

“You try.” Sasuke allowed. “Mostly when Pepper reminds you.”

“You wound me.” Tony said. “But _anyway_ , back to the point. Do you actually know what’s making the guys in your class hate you?”

“…I’m Rookie of the Year?” Sasuke hazarded. “And they want to fight the strongest person in the class to prove themselves?”

“Ah, the hated genius problem. Yeah, no, I had the same issue. Still, at least you’re the same age as your potential teammates. You don’t want to know how much it sucks when everyone you work with is ten years older than you and treats you like a kid that got in on money and daddy’s reputation instead of legitimate skill.” Tony laughed, though he clearly wasn’t amused by the memory. “Your problem might actually have a solution.”

“You think?” Sasuke frowned at the food he’d taken out. The rest would need two hands, minimum, once the frying pan finished heating up.

He shrugged and put the phone on speaker.

“Depends on how stubborn and/or desperate they are.” Tony said. “You might be able to talk them around right away, and you also might have to put effort into building the team for weeks before seeing them start to soften up.”

“And the girls?”

“I was always more than happy with the fangirls, but… if you do get one of the girls crushing on you put on your team, maybe tell her that you refuse to date until both you and your potential significant other are at a certain rank and you’ve worked together enough to be friends first?” Tony didn’t sound nearly as sure as Sasuke hoped he would.

“So… basically force them to either give up or become better kunoichi?” Sasuke asked. That didn’t sound too bad.

“You could say that you know people are after your eyes, so you want any girl you date to be capable of defending herself and her children should you eventually get married and have kids.” Tony suggested. “Or something like that.”

“It’s a good starting place.” Sasuke said, by now in the middle of frying a pair of eggs. “I can’t immediately think of a way for it to backfire.”

“I can.” Tony said brightly. “But only in dark, dark ways that I don’t want you thinking about.”

Sasuke snorted. “Right.”

o.o.o.o.o

**February 18, 2008**   
**1:12 PM**   
**Konohagakure**

The teams had been announced a little after eight that morning.

Sasuke and his new team ended up waiting for their teacher for about five hours.

(He really hoped this wasn’t an indicator of future behavior, but honestly, it probably was.)

Sasuke had thought about declaring his supposed new rules for dating when he was stuck with Sakura in a room for several hours, mostly alone, but had decided to wait.

Or chickened out. Either-or, really. There was something almost predatory about the girl, when he looked past the sweet, giggly surface. Like a really cute dinosaur. The pink hair was camouflage, a distraction meant to make you underestimate the ruthless creature beneath.

Probably, anyway.

He wasn’t sure if he was wary of her suddenly treating him like Naruto, or if he just didn’t want to deal with her crying. He’d had more than enough of weepy women (and men, and children of various genders) while visiting the Xavier Institute. Granted, crying there was more often caused by intolerant relatives or bad grades than anything else, but there was still more crying there than in Konoha’s Ninja Academy. They were civilians, though. They were more likely to cry in general.

Sasuke kind of just… settled in and tried to ignore Sakura and Naruto until their teacher showed up. For the first twenty or so minutes, he passed it off as trying to be professional, which had the advantage of being mostly true. After that, he’d spent too long being silent to break the quiet without it being awkward.

He pulled out the phone that Tony had given him about an hour in, a protoype of the next generation of Starkphone, trying to see what needed to be done to keep Apple from getting the majority market share like it seemed to be trying to do. Granted, Sasuke mostly just used things like the pedometer, music, some study aids, and JARVIS, but he could still report back on things like battery life and signal strength compared to older models.

(Tony had other people using the beta versions the “adult” apps, like the news and the stock tracker and the mobile banking stuff.)

It was honestly surprising that it took Naruto four hours to finally confront him about it in a way that didn’t involve glaring from a distance and making passive aggressive comments that only netted him criticism from Sakura.

“Hey bastard, what are you working on?” Naruto was suddenly about three inches from Sasuke’s face, expression somewhere between curious and aggressive. The mixture mostly just ended up looking a little constipated.

“Naruto! Stop being rude!” Sakura grabbed Naruto’s shoulder and yanked him away with surprising strength, all things considered. Her actions were a bit hypocritical, considering how rude she often was, but not exactly unappreciated. Sasuke wasn’t a fan of having people stick their faces into his personal space.

“Studying chemistry.” He answered honestly. “My uncle said that even if I’d graduated from the Ninja Academy, I still had to keep up with some civilian subjects.”

“Eh? You still have to study?” Naruto looked like he’d bitten into a lemon. “That sucks.”

Sasuke shrugged. “It’s not that bad. I’ve actually been allowed to start experimenting a little with the electrical engineering recently.”

Naruto blinked. “What’s that?”

“…a science thing.” Sasuke said after struggling for a few seconds to actually explain. “Using electricity to make things like lightbulbs and computers work.”

“Oh. Why didn’t you just say that?” Naruto made a face.

“Because saying ‘electrical engineering’ is quicker?” Sasuke shrugged, feeling a little helpless.

“You have an uncle?” Sakura interrupted, probably feeling left out of the conversation. She blushed and looked away when he turned towards her. “You don’t talk about your family much, and the only adult we ever really see you with is that lady with the darker skin, and she disappeared last year…”

“Ms. Darkholme. She was my caretaker whenever I was in Konoha.” Sasuke made a face. “My parents died when I was seven, and my uncle doesn’t live in Fire Country, so there were arrangements.”

“What about the rest of your clan? Couldn’t they take you in since your uncle was so far away?” Sakura asked.

Sasuke stared at her.

He turned to look at Naruto, who seemed just as expectant.

He blinked, and then couldn’t help but ask, “Are you seriously telling me you never heard about the Uchiha Massacre?”

Two shaking heads now, with Sakura seeming a bit taken aback, while Naruto just seemed confused.

“Okay. That’s… not exactly fine, but I guess you were young enough to forget since it didn’t directly affect you.” He wondered, for a moment, how many of the others in class had no memory of the massacre. A few of the clan kids certainly remembered, but if even Sakura didn’t know… “When I was seven years old, my older brother killed the entire Uchiha clan, save for me. I’m not sure why he left me alive. My uncle survived because he doesn’t live in the Hidden Nations, and he’s only a quarter Uchiha anyway. He’s, technically, my mother’s cousin.”

Sakura’s face was stuck in a parody of horror. Sasuke shifted away in case she decided it was time to try comforting him or something; he’d grown used to physical contact from some people, but his classmates were not among that count.

Naruto frowned for a few seconds before saying, “That’s kind of fucked up.”

“Naruto!” Sakura screeched, a high-pitched noise that made Sasuke want to cringe.

_She’s smart and relatively competent, but that attitude…_

He’d deal.

“What? It is! Who the hell just kills their family like that? Who just…” Naruto gestured wildly with his arms, almost smacking Sasuke in the face. “Throws all of that away?”

Sasuke abruptly remembered that Naruto was an orphan too, and had been for much longer, with far fewer resources.

He should probably have addressed that.

…Nope.

“Well, apparently, my older brother.” Sasuke said as blandly as he could manage, catching one of Naruto’s flailing arms and shoving it away from him. Naruto, of course, ended up absorbing the momentum in such a way that he fell off the desk he’d been perching on with a squawk.

Sakura squeaked as she scrambled away, and Sasuke looked back down at his Starkphone and hoped he could go back to studying, instead of engaging in awkward conversations about subjects he really didn’t want to talk about.

Neither of them bothered him, thankfully, until their teacher showed up. By that point, granted, Sasuke was almost wishing someone _would_ start asking uncomfortable questions again, if only to assuage the boredom.

“Maa,” the man said, acting as though there wasn’t chalk dust all through his hair. “My first impression is… I don’t like you. Meet me on the roof.”

Sasuke felt a few choice insults run through his head, and resolutely did not say any of them.

o.o.o.o.o

**February 18, 2008**   
**1:17 PM**   
**Konohagakure**

Kakashi eyed his students.

They watched him back, visibly nervous.

Well, genin were genin for a reason. They’d lose that anxiety eventually. Sasuke had probably lost most of the battle-related anxiety already, at least.

“So!” Kakashi clapped his hands together and smiled at them. “Let’s all introduce ourselves! You know, name, hobbies, likes, dislikes, dreams, that sort of thing.”

The three glanced at each other, and tiny little Sakura suggested he go first, to show them how he wanted it done.

Obviously, he did it in the least helpful way possible, because that was fun. Also because it would hopefully get them to maybe do some independent research and practice their information gathering, but that was a long shot.

Sakura and Naruto introduced themselves about the way he expected them to, with gushing odes to Sasuke and ramen respectively. Sasuke himself seemed a little disturbed by Sakura’s barely restrained commentary and Naruto’s declaration of dislike, but they could work on that.

“My name is Uchiha Sasuke. I like…” he frowned and seemed to think on that, “tomatoes and visiting the friends I’ve made in America, and my uncle and some of the people he’s close to. I dislike… sweets, betrayals, and _the Church of Humanity_.”

Kakashi had no idea what the last thing Sasuke said was; he didn’t speak English all that well. He’d have to ask later.

“I don’t know if I’d call it a hobby, but I study a lot of science, because it’s important to my uncle. And I guess watching science fiction shows to practice my English while I’m in Konoha is a hobby. As for dreams… to get some revenge for the Uchiha Massacre, I suppose, and reestablish my clan.”

That was _much_ more stable-sounding than most massacre survivors came off as. He’d had a few years to get better, though. And a number of years of therapy, going by his file.

“Well, now I know that we can sign up as possible volunteers for missions to the world outside the Hidden Nations!” Kakashi clapped his hands, waited for their faces to brighten, aaaaand, “Assuming you pass, of course.”

And there came the dismay. Ah, what a lovely sound.


	19. The Beginning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The plot is here, but that honestly doesn't mean much.

**February 19 th, 2008**   
**5:32 PM**   
**Konohagakure**

“And then he just _left_.” Sasuke finished narrating the events of the second genin exam to Tony. “He didn’t untie Naruto or tell us when to meet up tomorrow or anything.”

 “Did _you_ untie Naruto?”

“He should know rope escape techniques from the Academy already.”

“Sasuke.”

“ _Yes_ , I untied him.” Sasuke grumbled. “But only after he struggled enough for me to realize he actually needed the help.”

“And the girl?”

“Sakura is… very affectionate.” Sasuke said as diplomatically as he could. Tony wasn’t fooled by it for a moment.

“Did you tell her the thing?”

“…No.” Sasuke admitted as quietly as he could. “She’s… it’s weird. I know I’m stronger than her and that she’s not really all that good at any of the practical aspects of being a ninja, but there’s something about her that still scares me.”

“As much as that Ino chick?”

“No, because Ino reminds me of Dr. Frost and that’s even _more_ terrifying.” The Yamanaka as a whole were mind-readers and a lot of them looked like Dr. Frost, who was, in Sasuke’s humble opinion, one of the scariest women he’d ever met. Ino was the only Yamanaka that he interacted with regularly, though, and she was actually one of the highest ranking students in the class, even if she didn’t act like it. And she was interested in him. And that was all just… too much.

Sakura and Ino both had the whole “slightly aggressive fangirl” thing going on, and that would have been unnerving anyway, but Ino had the upper hand when it came to scary.

(He was going to have to introduce Ino to Dr. Frost one day, he knew. He was not looking forward to that day.)

“Well, you’re starting missions soon, right?” Tony drew Sasuke back to the present. “That should be fun, right?”

Sasuke frowned. “You start getting twitchy whenever I mention missions, Uncle.”

“I was given some very interesting information on that front, and also your Hokage put me into contact with your new teacher.” Tony’s voice was sunny, and Sasuke suddenly had a sinking feeling in his gut.

(The sinking feeling was proven correct when he found out what D-Rank missions, the standard fare for new genin, actually entailed.)

o.o.o.o.o

**March 3 rd, 2008**   
**6:03 PM**   
**Malibu**

Sasuke’s stories about his ‘fun’ as a genin were pretty much the biggest source of humor and distraction that Tony had these days. The stories tended to be silly, inane, or outright hilarious, especially when Sasuke tried to relate his ham-handed attempts at bonding with his teammates.

Tony needed that humor and distraction.

“Find anything, Pep?” He asked, looking over at where the woman in question was still looking through the files he’d handed her. They’d been working late for days now, ever since Tony had stumbled across a few inconsistencies that JARVIS couldn’t find an explanation for.

(A decade ago, Tony might have overlooked such an inconsistency as a simple error by the sales department or something, but years of caring for a ninja and gaining ninja-style paranoia by exposure had made him a much more suspicious person.)

“Nothing. I made a few calls to General Ross, but I just got his assistant, and then it was just getting passed around from person to person as they tried to figure out what was going on.” Pepper reached up to tuck a few escaped hairs behind her ear, and Tony’s eyes followed the movement with a vague sense of longing. “I’d say that they’re trying to fool us on purpose, but they wouldn’t. Not now that we’re in the final stages of the anti-Hulk equipment he asked us for. Same goes for SHIELD, if they want those quinjet prototypes done any time soon.”

“So we have no idea where the weapons are?” Tony leaned back in his seat and pinched the bridge of his nose.

“Everyone seems to think that someone else has them, or that someone else has an answer that can help, or that someone else was responsible for moving them.” Pepper sounded almost as frustrated as Tony felt. “Nobody has any answers.”

“Any word from Major Prentiss?”

“He says that there’s no record of any shipment on that day from us.” Pepper replied. “Similar stories with the others, where they never ordered in the first place, or they did but not as much as our records show, and so on.”

“But we’re still getting paid somehow.” Tony finished. “Someone’s still shelling out money for incredibly dangerous weaponry and we have no idea who.”

Pepper shrugged. “Did JARVIS find anything?”

“Ghost accounts and shell companies, sometimes through the military itself, but not always. Most of the stuff with SHIELD checks out, at least.” Tony dragged his hands down his face and groaned. “How the hell did we miss this?”

Pepper didn’t say anything, and when Tony looked at her, it was to find that she was biting her lip and looking even more worried than before.

“Pepper?”

“I think it’s an inside job, Tony.” She admitted. “The cover-ups are too clean, and some of this _couldn’t_ have happened unless it was someone that had inside access and… and a lot of influence.”

“So a member of the board, a department head, a liaison, that sort of thing.” Tony felt like breaking something. “Do we have eyes in current warzones? The Middle East, anything? Please tell me we can find out where at least some of these are ending up.”

“Nothing yet,” Pepper told him.

Tony swore.

o.o.o.o.o

**April 23 rd, 2008**   
**2:37 PM**   
**Konohagakure**

“I’m tired of these D-Rank missions, old man!” Naruto shouted at the Hokage, and Sasuke thought that, maybe, if he hoped hard enough, the floor would rise up and swallow him. Or swallow Naruto. Sasuke wasn’t picky.

“Oh?” The Hokage was _humoring_ the dumbass.

“Give us something cool to do!” Naruto kept shouting, and after a few more exchanges, Sasuke was introduced to his first C-Rank mission.

He wasn’t super impressed.

o.o.o.o.o

**April 24 th, 2008**   
**9:34 AM**   
**Konohagakure**

“I’ve just got a really bad feeling about this mission.” He confided when Sakura kept asking about why he was acting so strange, half an hour outside the village. “Like something is going to go horribly wrong.”

“What are you talking about?” Naruto butted into the conversation, “This is mission is gonna be awesome, dattebayo!”

Sasuke’s eye twitched a little as Sakura started yelling at Naruto for interrupting her ‘private conversation with Sasuke-kun!’ Whether it was due to Naruto’s interruption or Sakura’s response wasn’t up for debate, because the answer was ‘both.’

It was a little sad, he realized, that the civilians he’d befriended acted more mature than the shinobi he was on a team with. After a few moments, he also realized he’d said this out loud.

Sakura seemed… hurt, to be blunt, while Naruto was already shouting at Sasuke for being an asshole. Kakashi’s face wasn’t betraying anything, but Sasuke would have guessed he was disappointed.

(Tazuna was still drunk, and didn’t really seem to be paying attention.)

“I’m sorry,” Sasuke said before it could go any further. “I didn’t mean to say it out loud.”

“But you do think it’s true.” Sakura pointed out after they all digested the apology that didn’t really cover the part that had actually hurt.

“Well… yes.” Sasuke looked away, “But that doesn’t mean I should say it, since it’s pretty easy to guess that it wouldn’t make either of you happy.”

“And you aren’t going to apologize for thinking it’s true or go back on your words, are you?” Kakashi asked, and though it seemed mostly rhetorical, Sasuke answered anyway.

“I’m not going to change what I think or lie to an ally just because it might save them some hurt in the short term.” Sasuke tried to explain why he didn’t want to take back what he’d said. He wasn’t… he didn’t _want_ to hurt them, no, but the part he regretted was saying it out loud, not thinking it at all. It was true, even if it was unkind.

There was nothing wrong with thinking the truth.

“Wait, since when do you have friends?” Naruto demanded. “And civilians?”

“Since a year or so after I started living with my Uncle. He’s a civilian, and so are a lot of the people he knows.” Sasuke frowned. “And they’re good people, even if some of them are really weird.”

Not in the mutation sense. But in the ‘Remy was probably going to burn someone’s tongue off with the spices he stuck in his food’ and the ‘Ororo had all the Twilight books and actually _liked_ them for some reason’ and ‘David liked jazz and trashy emo music and refused to listen to why the latter was a bad thing’ sense.

“What are they like?” Sakura asked, as though trying to get her mind off of the insult Sasuke had leveled at her, or maybe just trying to figure out _how_ a civilian could be more mature than a shinobi at that age.

“I…” Sasuke’s mind blanked as he scrambled for a way to talk about the people he knew back in New York without breaking the NDAs he’d signed years ago. “David’s probably the smartest person I’ve ever met, and I’ve met a lot of smart people because of my uncle. He speaks like eighteen languages and he’s younger than us, and he’s really good with technology, but he mostly just hides in his room. Anna Marie can read people really well, but her opinions on this show we watch are _terrible_. Kitty’s good with computers and she’s really… bouncy, I guess. Kur—Kerstin is the only one that’s older than me, and she’s really quiet a lot of the time, but… I think Naruto would get along with her.”(1)

That was a bit of a scary thought.

“Yeah? How’s that?” Naruto demanded.

“Kerstin and Kitty tend to play pranks. I’d assume that you three would either compete to be the best or join forces and accidentally destroy us all.” _Keep the tone flat, expression blank, don’t let on that it’s an exaggeration and maybe they’ll understand that it’s a joke._

Sasuke had been given advice on a lot of things from a lot of people over the years. Humor was one of them.

“You have friends that _play pranks?_ ” Naruto demanded, as though this information would lead to him reevaluating everything he’d ever known about Sasuke.

“I guess? I mean, I don’t join in, but—”

This was the point at which a nearby puddle exploded into a pair of Kiri nukenin that proceeded to kill Kakashi.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (1) In case you forgot, Kerstin is one of the names that was brought up as a possible new name for Nightcrawler while transitioning to femme-presenting.
> 
> This chapter took me a lot of effort to do, because we’re getting into canon now, and nothing is quite so boring to write as Stations of the Canon.


	20. The Bridge

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Conclusion to the Wave Arc.

**May 12, 2012**  
**4:17 PM**  
**Helicarrier**

“Wait,” Steve interrupted, ignoring Tony’s affronted pout. “You became a member of the military at _twelve?_ ”

Sasuke glanced at Tony. “He didn’t make that clear earlier?”

“I thought you meant you were… running numbers or doing courier missions, or in some kind of boot camp, not…” Steve trailed off, and the look on his face was one of horror.

“See, that was basically my reaction for years.” Tony said, leaning forward and gesturing vaguely. “Their system is a literal shitshow.”

“Thank you _so_ much for disparaging my entire culture and way of life. Truly, you are a supportive family member.” Sasuke drawled, though he didn’t seem to be all that insulted.

“What part of ‘I don’t approve of turning children into soldiers’ has changed in the last ten years?” Tony asked. “And don’t pretend you don’t agree, kid. You’ve complained about some of this bullshit to me enough.”

Sasuke shrugged.

“I am rather curious as to the nature of the test you mentioned.” Thor said, when nobody said anything, the conversation stalling out. “You did not include much detail as to what happened there.”

“Kakashi wanted to see if we were capable of teamwork. We were.” Sasuke answered with the careful abruptness of someone who wanted you to know how very carefully you would need to tread in the conversation.

“Oh, I can answer this one.” Tony said, trampling all over the conversation in turn. “Because he used a bunch of prototypes that he’d made for a project I set him, like flashbangs and some distraction-based tech.”

“That doesn’t explain the embarra—” Steve started to say, but Tony cut him off.

“His _teammate,_ on the other hand, used a clone technique and a temporary transformation technique to turn into a harem of naked women as a distraction.”

There was a small patch of red high on Sasuke’s cheeks, and he stared woodenly at the wall.

“They were _twelve_.” Steve may not have been the innocent prude that everyone thought he was, but… _twelve_.

Tony shrugged. “I’m not going to excuse it.”

“He taught the same technique to an eight-year-old,” Sasuke said, as though this would somehow make the situation better. His eyes only indicated boredom. “Granted, the kid is twelve _now_ , and I wouldn’t be surprised of he’d somehow moved on to teaching the kid actual offensive techniques, but if you want to be offended at a child using a perverted technique, I’d be more concerned about the eight-year-old.”

Steve stared.

“Anyway, moving on. The mission to Wave was important because—”

o.o.o.o.o

**April 27 th, 2008**  
**4:27 PM**  
**Wave Country (Nami no Kuni)**

Zabuza was _terrifying_.

Okay, so Sasuke had seen people die around him before. Hell, he’d seen people die just three days ago, when the demon brothers had attacked them on the road. He’d felt killing intent, and he’d seen death.

Yet somehow, Zabuza made him freeze up.

He considered, for just a moment, electrocuting the water with the tech he had in his bag. But it would take too long to set up, and Kakashi was on the water too. Not to mention all the fish.

“Hey Sasuke.” Naruto whispered, and Sasuke kind of wanted to smack him upside the head, because Zabuza was a master of _silent killing_. He could _almost definitely_ hear them. “I have an idea.”

o.o.o.o.o

**April 28 th, 2008**  
**10:42 AM**  
**Wave Country (Nami no Kuni)**

“I hate this mission so much.” Sasuke groaned, carefully drying out the plastic bags that contained most of his tech. It wasn’t a lot, and at least most of it had stayed dry on the inside, but getting the tech OUT without getting it wet was going to be a hassle.

His phone had only somewhat survived the ocean, and he was fairly certain that he was going to have to replace parts of it to make sure it stopped glitching.

And he was in the middle of nowhere, which meant jury rigging, which meant he was going to have to _tell Tony about it_.

That would inevitably lead to a lengthy discussion of what he did wrong and what he could have done better, and while Sasuke knew it was only done to help him develop his skills, it was still annoying and occasionally disheartening.

“How’s Kakashi?” He asked instead of continuing to dwell on how to fix his phone so that JARVIS stopped glitching out.

“Unconscious, still. I’m not expecting him to wake up for a day or two, but I’m not an expert.” Sakura said, plopping down next to him and taking a look at the plastic bags filled with tech. “So, um… what is all this?”

She’d been a little more subdued than usual since Sasuke’s accidental criticism of her maturity, which he wasn’t sure how to feel about. Relieved? Guilty?

“Tech. Most of it’s weapons, but some of it is other random stuff.” Sasuke gestured to the groups he’d sorted them into, by function. “Grenades, most of them flash-bangs, because my uncle doesn’t want to trust me with explosives until I can prove I know how to take them apart and put them back together again without blowing myself up. I don’t know what to call that group other than ‘noisemakers’, because they’re built to roll away and make noise to distract an enemy. Those little grey spheres are actually EMPs, which… honestly, I doubt I’ll ever need them in the Elemental Nations, but my uncle says it’s always a good idea, so I’ve got three.”

“What’s an EMP?”

“Electro-Magnetic Pulse.” Sasuke said in English, and then translated. “They’re mostly only good for knocking out electronic equipment. Anything that’s more than a little sensitive gets fried. On a low setting, it’s just knocked out for half an hour. On a high one, it can short-circuit it well enough to actually emit sparks and cause an electrical fire, if there’s anything to serve as kindling nearby.”

“Oh.” Sakura looked back down at the little groups of electronics. “And the rest?”

“Just things that I’d expect I need to fix the other things. Transistors, soldering gun, that sort of thing.” Sasuke frowned. “Which I’m actually going to have to do, since my phone’s glitching out from the water it got hit with.”

“It wasn’t in a bag?”

“The bags are there to keep the tech dry, because I knew we’d be going to Wave, but…  it seemed more efficient to keep the phone within easy reach, since I can’t use it very well through the bag like the grenades, and it isn’t something that I’ll only rarely use, and with warning, like the EMPs or the noisemakers. Obviously, that backfired.” Sasuke finally reached over to one of the bags and opened it to grab a tiny screwdriver, pliers, and what looked like a set of tweezers. “I’m going to start taking it apart to get a look at the damage. I can tell you want I’m doing while I do it, if you want.”

The blush on Sakura’s cheeks, just barely visible before, deepened, and Sasuke cursed himself. “Okay, Sasuke-kun!”

Well. It was a work in progress.

o.o.o.o.o

**May 1 st, 2008**  
**4:27 PM**  
**Wave Country (Nami no Kuni)**

“Bingo,” Sasuke muttered as he watched his phone flare to life. He’d only gotten back from the tree-climbing exercises half an hour ago, but despite his exhaustion, couldn’t get to sleep. Naruto was somehow _still_ out there, and Sasuke absolutely did not want to imagine how or why.

“JARVIS?”

“Hello, Master Sasuke. How may I help you today?”

“What information can you get me on Gato and on Wave’s legal policies regarding corporations and such?”

o.o.o.o.o

**May 4 th, 2008**  
**11:03 AM**  
**Wave Country (Nami no Kuni)**

Sasuke never found out what it was, exactly, that Naruto said to Inari to get him to stop moping. He was just glad he didn’t have to get involved.

He _did_ have to get involved on the bridge, but this time, he had a plan. Sort of. He did until he got trapped in the ice mirror cage, anyway, and then he was just getting pelted from every angle by lots and lots of senbon. After a certain point, he sort of just hoped to high heaven that ice was as good a conductor as water, that the chakra would enhance a current instead of negating it, that the mirror were as connected as they looked, that whatever he hit the mirrors with would transfer to the fake hunter nin if he just made his attack affect them all, and tazed one of the mirrors. (1)

The fake hunter nin spasmed and stumbled out of one of the mirrors. They recovered the ability to stand fairly quickly, but by that point, Sasuke had come around behind them and put them into the kind of hold that put _exactly_ the right kind of pressure on the arteries to induce fainting. They were stronger than Sasuke, but the electric shock had done enough to slow them down that it didn’t matter in the end. As the fake hunter nin lost consciousness, the ice mirrors melted, and Sasuke held on just a few extra seconds to make sure his opponent was _properly_ insensate, rather than faking it or only partway there.

“Kyaaah, Sasuke-kun! So cool!”

“Dammit bastard, you couldn’t have waited a few more seconds? I wanted to be all cool and show up at the last moment like a real hero!”

Sasuke made a weird noise in the back of his throat that even he couldn’t entirely define, but it definitely indicated his utter lack of amusement. “Well, maybe if you’d _shown up on time_ , you wouldn’t have had this problem.”

“Hey, I had to save Inari’s mom from the guys that showed up to kidnap her!” Naruto protested, and while sleeping in to save Tsunami wasn’t really something Sasuke thought he’d done on _purpose_ , he could acknowledge that Naruto had definitely helped by keeping the woman safe. “Uh… dude. Sasuke. Your eyes.”

Sasuke blinked for a moment, staring at Naruto and completely _not_ understanding, and then scrambled for a kunai that would be reflective enough to show his—

_Sharingan._

Holy smokes.

“Uh, earth to bastard, we got shit to do?”

With a small start, Sasuke stopped staring at his eyes and shoved the kunai away. “Fine. What do we do about Kakashi?”

“Uh… I could storm them with clones?” Naruto suggested, like it wasn’t his plan for literally everything. “Or we could, I don’t know, use one of your bombs?”

Sasuke pursed his lips and furrowed his brow. “If I could just get him to stay still long enough to _listen_ , I could talk him out of it, I think.”

Naruto gave him a slightly incredulous look. Sakura was less doubting, but there were still shades of it.

“Not because I’m _persuasive_ , I just have access to information that he doesn’t.” Sasuke waved them off, and then hesitated for a moment. In the end, he just cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted. “He’s not planning on paying you!”

“I guessed!” Zabuza shouts back, currently in the middle of trying to overwhelm Kakashi’s lone kunai with his massive sword. Sasuke has no idea how the kunai wasn’t breaking, but whatever. “That’s what intimidation tactics are for!”

“He hired an army to kill you so he could get out of paying you!” Sasuke continued, and with that, something in Zabuza’s face, as hidden as it is, _shifts_.

“And how the hell would you know?”

“He has a camera in his office for long-distance video conferences. He doesn’t bother to check to see if it’s on, and it’s possible to access it remotely if you know how. I just… hacked it.” Well, JARVIS had hacked it. But the point remained that Sasuke had video evidence. “He’s hoping you and Kakashi will kill each other off, or at least weaken each other to the point where the army has easy pickings.”

“Seriously?” Naruto asked, apparently not understanding the meaning of being discreet.

“Yes, and I have video evidence.” Sasuke said after a moment, if only to drive the fact home. “If you’re planning on intimidating your way into getting paid anyway, why not just give it a moment now, and make sure you can take down his army with minimum effort, instead of fighting what _seems_ to be a losing battle against one of Konoha’s best?”

“I’ve got a reputation to uphold, kid. Nobody wants to hire a missing nin that doesn’t get the job done.”

“And a reputation for taking out those who try to cheat you?” Literally all Sasuke was doing by this point was stalling, but it seemed to be working, mostly.

A mocking laugh came from the end of the bridge, and Sasuke gave a tiny sigh of relief as he was proved right.

(Tony had always been a great advocator of talking your way into a better position.)

o.o.o.o.o

**May 4 th, 2008**  
**3:02 PM**  
**Wave Country (Nami no Kuni)**

“Well, they’re no longer hostile, but we can’t just let them go.” Kakashi said, once Sasuke got around to asking what the hell was going to happen now that Gato was dead. “We don’t even know what’s going to happen to Gato’s company.”

“It was privately owned and he didn’t name an heir or otherwise organize what would happen to it, so by Wave’s laws, all the assets revert to government ownership.” Sasuke quoted JARVIS almost word for word.

Kakashi raised his lone visible eyebrow. “Still doesn’t give us a solution for the Kiri nukenin.”

“Haku isn’t a nukenin,” Naruto chimes in, sitting right next to the incredibly pretty boy in question.

(“I’m a boy.” Haku said, and Sasuke blinked.)

(“Okay, then. He/him pronouns it is.”)

(Haku had giggled when Naruto squawked in offense that _Sasuke_ hadn’t freaked out over Haku looking like a girl.)

(Later on, when Haku found him alone and asked, Sasuke just explained about Kurt and all the queer theory he’d subsequently learned about.)

(“I’m not going to ask about what’s in your pants, or how you were born. But whatever the circumstances are, I’m not going to be offended or shocked just because I made a faulty assumption about someone’s gender based on how they present. I should probably just stop making assumptions in general, really, but most of the world still goes by presentation equals gender identity, and some people get offended if I ask their pronouns, because they’re too conservative and think I should just be able to tell, so… anyway. Yeah. That’s why I didn’t freak out, since you asked. No matter how pretty you are or how much pink you wear, if you say you’re a boy, then that’s what I’ll go with.”)

(“You think I’m pretty?”)

“Technically speaking, as I was never a Kiri shinobi in the first place, I cannot be a nukenin. I’ve also kept under the radar well enough for them to have very little idea that I exist.” Haku clarified, and Kakashi sighed.

“You still tried to kill us.”

“Konoha and Kiri don’t have extradition treaties, or even any kind of agreement to go after one another’s criminals in the first place.” Sakura mused. “I don’t even think it would be illegal for us to aid in the Kiri revolution.”

“It would be an _act of war_ , Sakura-chan.” Kakashi stressed, and kneaded the heel of one palm against his temple. “Amongst many other things.”

Sasuke let it all wash over him, considering, and then asked, “But what if we just… got them jobs outside of the Hidden Continent?”

There was a pregnant pause, followed by Kakashi’s very strong “ _No, Sasuke._ ”

“Why not? We don’t have to kill them or hand them over to the authorities, which is good because then Naruto isn’t going to mope around and—”

“Hey!”

“—get his feelings all over the place. We don’t have to leave them taking missions that ultimately damage Konoha’s economy by taking lower payments and working against our interests. And we can discreetly help enable a change in leadership in Kiri, which would only help us in the long run, for obvious reasons.” Sasuke shrugged. “I mean, we’d probably have to fake their deaths or something, but it’s a solution, right?”

Kakashi looked like he wanted very much to groan and bury his head in his hands. “The Hokage is going to disapprove.”

“Not if we get Naruto to endorse the idea at the top of his lungs.” Sasuke retorts, because the Hokage’s soft spot for Naruto is kind of a massive open secret. “Or get him to use the Sexy technique. Or just give the Hokage a sad look. You _know this to be true_.”

“Before you lot keep arguing,” Zabuza interrupts before Kakashi can reply again, “I’d like to ask if we get any input on this, and also where the hell you think we’d be able to get jobs in the first place, considering we don’t exactly have legal means to exit the country.”

Sasuke glanced at Kakashi, who just sighed and made a ‘go ahead’ motion.

“Ever heard of Stark Industries?”

o.o.o.o.o

**(1) Ice is actually a _worse_ conductor than water. Assume that Sasuke’s tazer worked because of the chakra in the ice or something.**

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It took me this long to write because I couldn’t convince myself that rewriting the Wave Arc would be anything other than boring. It still was, in places, but I ultimately got the whole thing done in less than two days once I actually sat down and did it. Yay?
> 
> I really hate rehashing canon, guys. That’s why almost all the scenes you see are where/how things went different.
> 
> I headcanon Haku as genderqueer. Not sure if he’s genderfluid or binary trans or bigender or what, but he sure as hell ain’t cis. Even I’m not sure what he was declared at birth, so just go with whichever headcanon makes the most sense to you, so long as it follows the “he isn’t cis” part.
> 
> By the way, should I add Young Avengers and other fandom tags for things that have been popping up in-fic but not entirely in-focus (like Kate and David, and that one really small cameo by Billy)? Or should I leave them out?
> 
> ALSO I feel that I should mention that this was foreshadowed way back in like... Chapter 5, I think? Who managed to guess who "Mr. White" was?

**Author's Note:**

> This story begins in medias res, and future scenes will jump between the main story and the backstory. As a rule, each scene will begin with a timestamp and a location for ease of understanding.
> 
> This story contains a minimum of original characters (a nurse providing exposition, a waiter asking for orders, etcetera).
> 
> This story will contain a number of characters from non-MCU Marvel franchises (such as various mutants, the Young Avengers, and the Inhumans). However, the majority of these characters will not be introduced for a number of years in-story, and those that are introduced early on will be introduced piecemeal so as to make things easier for MCU fans that are not general Marvel fans. Characters that are present in Marvel but not in the MCU are liable to have their personalities, histories, and possibly even looks tweaked, as per the pattern set up by other universes Marvel as set up (e.g. compare mainstream (616) Kate Bishop to Ultimate (1610) Kate Bishop).


End file.
